D
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This is a very interesting point. I have found myself with the boot on my other foot, so to speak, when I lived abroad for 4 years a long time ago. I tended to keep my head down and my mouth shut, with respect to nationality-realted issues, as a foreigner. Unlike some of the ex pat bores who daily invited 'why don't you sod off, then? comments from the locals - albeit they never said this. But there came a point when I had to decide whether to stay or go. I think that if I had stayed I would have grasped the nettle and gone native. I would have had to have done, in my book. Its only polite. And when I came back to England it was work and family rather than any sense of not wanting to be Canadian that swung it.
Ironically the boot has been on yet another foot with my lad. Born in Canada, living in the UK between age 3 and 6, he finally settled here when he was 12 (too complicated to explain). He got his UK citizenship when he was 20 (it is not a formailty by any means). Now he's very much a Brit.
I think that if you move permanently to another country, you should be humble, and do whatever you can to 'become' native. I have never been happy with the monoculture silos we have allowed to form in the UK. Not just allow, but encourage (by dumping or directing folk into particular areas, since the 1950s, rather than requiring dispersion and assimilation).
Unlike you I am hopeful that it isn't too late. It may take a long time, but eventually the kids, or the kids of the kids will say 'bollock to this - I'm English', as I see every day with the students I teach in London. Close my eyes and they all sound English (with the occasional jock - which has included a female Muslim jock who was so jock I wanted to bludgeon a Crankie). Open my eyes, and they are English. Admittedly they are middle class English, but En.glish nonetheless. There is hope here somewhere . . .
By contrast, a mate who works at a much 'lesser' higher education institute tells me that Muslim boys often harrass any Muslim female if they don't dress correctly . . . . my view is that on average this type of behaviour is more prevalent with the less gifted - fancy that!
All the best.
Trouble is we have let our guard down on Islam in the name of political correctness. I think the link to this article says everything about the last part in your post about Muslim females being told to dress correctly. I really don't want my daughter growing up in a society where women need to cover up and then that eventually becomes the norm, and it's worrying when I hear things like the UK is becoming more Islamic than other Islamic countries. It's not good for anyone especially females.
http://www.dailymail.co.uk/debate/a...lamification-fashion-terrible-blow-women.html
http://www.huffingtonpost.co.uk/201...i-faith-dignity-gowns-hospital_n_9385452.html