bn1&bn3 Albion
Well-known member
Saw this posted on the Middlesboro forum, writing about Burnley...
Burnley have a very strange compass as a football club. They employ Joey Barton, spend 8m on Andre Gray and sent off the Belgian Prince back home after a few months whilst claiming they haven't spent any money. Dyche has even admitted the club doesn't have any real scouting network, which is why the crux of their dealings next season will be yet more overpriced players from the Championship. (What's the betting they'll try and buy Friend or Clayton from us? Is that Barry Bannan's agent on the phone?)
Eddie Howe - the one, the only, pretty much built their strike-force. Austin and Ings were all brought in on his watch, Vokes was signed and scouted by him (as he previously played with him at Bournemouth) and Jay Rodriguez (remember him?) was reignited under his management. Owen Coyle almost sold him for nothing iirc.
Dyche has come in with his strong ginger chin and just grafted some discipline at the back. But let's make no bones about this, they are limited in certain areas and are limiting themselves. I like Burnley (my grandad is from Burnley) but I'm just a little saddened that they seem to be stuck in this perma-loop of hovering between 17th in the Premier League and the Championship playoffs.
Listen if we don't go up, at least it will be Brighton going up instead and at least they offer something different to Burnley. At least they'll spend money, go out and buy some attractive players and set in stone something useful for the next few years and gain some admirers both at home and abroad. Burnley will go up, buy some average British players, get relegated, buy more overpriced British players, go up, get relegated, ad-nausem. Its boring. Who the *** wants that?
I probably seem like a snob when I say this, but they don't seem like a Premier League club or even one that is comfortable being a Premier League club. Their u18 team plays in League 3 (ours were PL champions last year) and they play in an ugly outdated stadium. (Well two of their stands are ugly and outdated.) Honestly, they are basically Wimbledon for the Netflix generation. Do you really think they are gonna go up, buy a player like Shinji Okazaki and then take the league by storm, while gaining a ton of new admirers around the globe? Hell no. They are the ugly bridesmaid that nobody wants to shag at the reception.
They are boring. They look boring. They play boring. They have boring players. They have a boring future.
There is actually a street not too far from Turf Moor which is named after my great granddad. He was a massive philanthropist to the town. So come at me Clarets fans - I don't care. I don't hate your club or your town. I hate what you are trying to do, which is to systematically bore the *** pants off me and every single football supporter in the world by having the aesthetic qualities of a door-stop. Sign a *** foreign player, play something different to 4-4-***-2 and try to project an image to the rest of the world that doesn't perpetuate the stereotype that your fans have six fingers and Burnley is a backwards inbreeding ***-hole. You're going to the Premier League now. Stop acting like a homeless man stumbling around Harrods. You deserve to be there, so act like that and I won't find you so odious for the next 12 months.
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