- Oct 17, 2008
- 14,575
Warning - mega post.
Welp, it's that time again. FM 2017 Beta is well and truly out and I'm really enjoying it so far. Couple of random crashes (it's a beta after all) but nothing too infuriating as I set autosave fortnightly. Every season there is something before the first patch which is ridiculously wrong. It's the same with every game! Previously it has been; too many penalties, too many red/yellow cards, too many injuries, that kind of thing. Then it gets patched and job's a gooden. Don't ask me why this happens! This year, the ball hits the post/bar at least twice a match, normally from mishit crosses. Lots of goals from the ball rebounding back off the keeper, too.
I decided this year that, despite playing an Albion career every game since CM 96/97, we're actually a bit too good now! With the ground, the money, the great chairman, great squad etc to be honest I don't think it'd be a challenge. So I started unemployed at the very bottom rung and this is what has happened so far;
CURRENT GAME DATE
7th August 2017
CURRENT TEAM
Barnet FC
LEAGUES RUNNING
Brazil (All)
England (All)
France (All)
Germany (All)
Italy (All)
Scotland (All)
Large database
I began unemployed with my real details (30-something, English, fat *******, blue/white Albion tie in case they decided to suddenly sack Hughton and I got an interview). Started on National C (lowest) licence as a 'tactical' manager with 'Semi Professional' ex-playing experience.
I applied for every job going until finally getting an interview - for Conference South relegation candidates Bishop's Stortford. My blue and white interview tie sealed the deal, as luckily they play in Albion's colours, plus by promising them I'd play route one football. I began to consider myself the Egil Olsen of the non-league scene and started wearing wellingtons to matches. (Why isn't there an option for this??).
Things started badly after an almost-immediate bust-up with my new chairman, Ian Kitteridge. First of all, he completed nixed my suggestion to find a parent club, as any income received would be 'negligible'. I pointed out that we only had £20k in the bank and about seven fit players, but Ian held firm. With my wage-free loanee idea pooh-poohed, I suggested a 'trial day' to try and sign anyone half decent in the Hertfordshire region, but was told that all the locals were too shit to play for us, despite us losing our first friendly 1-6 at home to a fellow Conference South side.
I realised that I had a tough job on, losing the next two friendlies heavily, so focused on being as defensive and boring as possible. I switched from my trademark 4-2-3-1 Wide to a rigid 4-5-1, playing route one, very narrow and even ordered the groundsman to narrow the pitch. Sadly, due to skinflint ******* Kitteridge refusing to buy a lawnmower to trim the pitch, we got the youth team boys in with a pair of scissors each. It took three weeks.
Desperately needing to strengthen the squad (nearly all of whom were playing on a non-contract basis for appearance money only), I resorted to signing former Albion failure and noted gambling addict Lee Hendrie on a pay-as-you-play basis. This had huge ramifications as the fans immediately took a disliking to Lee, telling me his signing was an 'aberration'. He turned out to be utter shit. In fact, over the course of the season 99 (!!) trialists came and went. Inexplicably, former Barcelona player and Swedish captain Patrick Andersson joined as Chief Scout. With no transfer budget, Roy Essandoh (remember him?) as my assistant and a tiny £4k per week to spend on wages, recruitment was tough.
I landed Oxlade-Chamberlain though! Alex's brother. On loan.
My nightmare positions were goalkeeper and striker, in fact by November I had used five goalkeepers in league matches. Eventually, Brazilian Evandro Rachoni took the captain's armband from the hapless (and luckless at the bookies) Lee Hendrie and made the position his own.
Things started reasonably well, with my defence holding up nicely, going unbeaten in our first ten league games and conceding only twice. We were extremely lucky in this spell as we seemed to have one shot on target per match and score it, while keeping eleven men behind the ball home and away. A sudden 0-3 defeat to eventual champions Ebbsfleet United saw us come unstuck. We briefly got things back on back before three consecutive 4-0 hammering, two at home, including our first and only televised game against Charlton in the FA Cup First Round. Due to it being a BBC broadcast, I made a point of saying I don't pay my licence fee during my post-match interview, I was just about to start on a tirade about Jimmy Savile before Manish Bhasin cut me off, the smug *******. Still, it was a sell-out and Kitteridge got to line his pockets. We now had over £300k in the bank and I hadn't seen a penny of it.
The FA Trophy saw a limp first round exit in a tricky tie away at Aldershot, but by now I was starting to lose faith in the direction we were taking. This is for two reasons;
Firstly, I was offered a new contract, for less than my part-time physio was earning. When I tried to haggle, they played hardball. We were fourth in the league at the time!
Secondly, as almost my entire team were playing without contracts - and unwilling to sign them because they felt the club was too small - towards the end of the season I lost my best player and only consistent performer, Reece Hall-Johnson, to League Two Mansfield for nothing. We then lost key centre-back Zac Fagan for the same reason to bloody AFC Fylde! This, coupled with a minor mutiny after I decided to fine thug-like midfielder Lee Sawyer for getting his THIRD straight red in 14 games, all for two-footed lunges from behind, I decided it might be time to further my career.
As the season reached its climax, and distracted by (unsuccessful) job interviews at Wrexham, Accrington Stanley, Wycombe Wanderers, Mansfield Town and York City, we reached the playoffs on the final game of the season. A win saw us finish in 5th, the final playoff spot, and the joint highest ever finish in The Blues' 147 year history. Kitteridge offered me another contract, with an extra £25 per week to sweeten the deal. If I wasn't actively looking to leave before, I was now, no matter what happened in the playoffs.
We were drawn against Wealdstone. We won the first leg at Woodside Park 1-0, on a terrible surface due to constant flooding and having to also train there.
Our constant indiscipline (worst disciplinary record in all of the leagues - I checked) was our eventual downfall. Already trailing 0-1 in the return fixture, but hanging on in the tie, we were once again reduced to ten men when useless Aston Villa loanee Joonas Sundman was sent off. I decided to park the bus and play for penalties, and it worked! Then... heartbreak as we lost 9-8 in a thrilling penalty shootout. Arse.
Immediately after the match I pulled a Gus, telling the press that I feel I had taken the club as far as they can go (I failed to add 'under that **** Kitteridge', my one regret) and began applying for every available job again ala Ruel Fox. I reluctantly signed a one year deal with just one day remaining on my contract, however.
I finally successfully interviewed for and was offered the Boreham Wood and Gateshead jobs (both in Conference National) - and the Barnet job in League Two. I held on for the Barnet job - and got it! A huge fictional payrise to over £600 p/w and a chance to manage in league football. Last season they finished a respectable 12th but I've inherited a weakish squad (or maybe I'm just getting my excuses in early). I'll update my progress at The Hive in the next edition!
IN OTHER NEWS
Man Utd won the Premier League by 14 points, with Swansea, Sunderland and Hull (on 18 points and two wins all season) going down.
Man Utd have just signed 29 year old Gonzalo Higuain for £53m, potentially rising to £84m.
England lie in second in World Cup 2018 qualification, trailing Scotland on goal difference. A 1-1 draw against Lithuania being the lowlight so far.
The Albion finished 5th, with Newcastle winning the league with 100 points, 19 points clear of Norwich in 2nd. We lost on penalties to Brentford in the playoffs, who subsequently beat Aston Villa to win promotion to the PL.
Welp, it's that time again. FM 2017 Beta is well and truly out and I'm really enjoying it so far. Couple of random crashes (it's a beta after all) but nothing too infuriating as I set autosave fortnightly. Every season there is something before the first patch which is ridiculously wrong. It's the same with every game! Previously it has been; too many penalties, too many red/yellow cards, too many injuries, that kind of thing. Then it gets patched and job's a gooden. Don't ask me why this happens! This year, the ball hits the post/bar at least twice a match, normally from mishit crosses. Lots of goals from the ball rebounding back off the keeper, too.
I decided this year that, despite playing an Albion career every game since CM 96/97, we're actually a bit too good now! With the ground, the money, the great chairman, great squad etc to be honest I don't think it'd be a challenge. So I started unemployed at the very bottom rung and this is what has happened so far;
CURRENT GAME DATE
7th August 2017
CURRENT TEAM
Barnet FC
LEAGUES RUNNING
Brazil (All)
England (All)
France (All)
Germany (All)
Italy (All)
Scotland (All)
Large database
I began unemployed with my real details (30-something, English, fat *******, blue/white Albion tie in case they decided to suddenly sack Hughton and I got an interview). Started on National C (lowest) licence as a 'tactical' manager with 'Semi Professional' ex-playing experience.
I applied for every job going until finally getting an interview - for Conference South relegation candidates Bishop's Stortford. My blue and white interview tie sealed the deal, as luckily they play in Albion's colours, plus by promising them I'd play route one football. I began to consider myself the Egil Olsen of the non-league scene and started wearing wellingtons to matches. (Why isn't there an option for this??).
Things started badly after an almost-immediate bust-up with my new chairman, Ian Kitteridge. First of all, he completed nixed my suggestion to find a parent club, as any income received would be 'negligible'. I pointed out that we only had £20k in the bank and about seven fit players, but Ian held firm. With my wage-free loanee idea pooh-poohed, I suggested a 'trial day' to try and sign anyone half decent in the Hertfordshire region, but was told that all the locals were too shit to play for us, despite us losing our first friendly 1-6 at home to a fellow Conference South side.
I realised that I had a tough job on, losing the next two friendlies heavily, so focused on being as defensive and boring as possible. I switched from my trademark 4-2-3-1 Wide to a rigid 4-5-1, playing route one, very narrow and even ordered the groundsman to narrow the pitch. Sadly, due to skinflint ******* Kitteridge refusing to buy a lawnmower to trim the pitch, we got the youth team boys in with a pair of scissors each. It took three weeks.
Desperately needing to strengthen the squad (nearly all of whom were playing on a non-contract basis for appearance money only), I resorted to signing former Albion failure and noted gambling addict Lee Hendrie on a pay-as-you-play basis. This had huge ramifications as the fans immediately took a disliking to Lee, telling me his signing was an 'aberration'. He turned out to be utter shit. In fact, over the course of the season 99 (!!) trialists came and went. Inexplicably, former Barcelona player and Swedish captain Patrick Andersson joined as Chief Scout. With no transfer budget, Roy Essandoh (remember him?) as my assistant and a tiny £4k per week to spend on wages, recruitment was tough.
I landed Oxlade-Chamberlain though! Alex's brother. On loan.
My nightmare positions were goalkeeper and striker, in fact by November I had used five goalkeepers in league matches. Eventually, Brazilian Evandro Rachoni took the captain's armband from the hapless (and luckless at the bookies) Lee Hendrie and made the position his own.
Things started reasonably well, with my defence holding up nicely, going unbeaten in our first ten league games and conceding only twice. We were extremely lucky in this spell as we seemed to have one shot on target per match and score it, while keeping eleven men behind the ball home and away. A sudden 0-3 defeat to eventual champions Ebbsfleet United saw us come unstuck. We briefly got things back on back before three consecutive 4-0 hammering, two at home, including our first and only televised game against Charlton in the FA Cup First Round. Due to it being a BBC broadcast, I made a point of saying I don't pay my licence fee during my post-match interview, I was just about to start on a tirade about Jimmy Savile before Manish Bhasin cut me off, the smug *******. Still, it was a sell-out and Kitteridge got to line his pockets. We now had over £300k in the bank and I hadn't seen a penny of it.
The FA Trophy saw a limp first round exit in a tricky tie away at Aldershot, but by now I was starting to lose faith in the direction we were taking. This is for two reasons;
Firstly, I was offered a new contract, for less than my part-time physio was earning. When I tried to haggle, they played hardball. We were fourth in the league at the time!
Secondly, as almost my entire team were playing without contracts - and unwilling to sign them because they felt the club was too small - towards the end of the season I lost my best player and only consistent performer, Reece Hall-Johnson, to League Two Mansfield for nothing. We then lost key centre-back Zac Fagan for the same reason to bloody AFC Fylde! This, coupled with a minor mutiny after I decided to fine thug-like midfielder Lee Sawyer for getting his THIRD straight red in 14 games, all for two-footed lunges from behind, I decided it might be time to further my career.
As the season reached its climax, and distracted by (unsuccessful) job interviews at Wrexham, Accrington Stanley, Wycombe Wanderers, Mansfield Town and York City, we reached the playoffs on the final game of the season. A win saw us finish in 5th, the final playoff spot, and the joint highest ever finish in The Blues' 147 year history. Kitteridge offered me another contract, with an extra £25 per week to sweeten the deal. If I wasn't actively looking to leave before, I was now, no matter what happened in the playoffs.
We were drawn against Wealdstone. We won the first leg at Woodside Park 1-0, on a terrible surface due to constant flooding and having to also train there.
Our constant indiscipline (worst disciplinary record in all of the leagues - I checked) was our eventual downfall. Already trailing 0-1 in the return fixture, but hanging on in the tie, we were once again reduced to ten men when useless Aston Villa loanee Joonas Sundman was sent off. I decided to park the bus and play for penalties, and it worked! Then... heartbreak as we lost 9-8 in a thrilling penalty shootout. Arse.
Immediately after the match I pulled a Gus, telling the press that I feel I had taken the club as far as they can go (I failed to add 'under that **** Kitteridge', my one regret) and began applying for every available job again ala Ruel Fox. I reluctantly signed a one year deal with just one day remaining on my contract, however.
I finally successfully interviewed for and was offered the Boreham Wood and Gateshead jobs (both in Conference National) - and the Barnet job in League Two. I held on for the Barnet job - and got it! A huge fictional payrise to over £600 p/w and a chance to manage in league football. Last season they finished a respectable 12th but I've inherited a weakish squad (or maybe I'm just getting my excuses in early). I'll update my progress at The Hive in the next edition!
IN OTHER NEWS
Man Utd won the Premier League by 14 points, with Swansea, Sunderland and Hull (on 18 points and two wins all season) going down.
Man Utd have just signed 29 year old Gonzalo Higuain for £53m, potentially rising to £84m.
England lie in second in World Cup 2018 qualification, trailing Scotland on goal difference. A 1-1 draw against Lithuania being the lowlight so far.
The Albion finished 5th, with Newcastle winning the league with 100 points, 19 points clear of Norwich in 2nd. We lost on penalties to Brentford in the playoffs, who subsequently beat Aston Villa to win promotion to the PL.
, who was bobbins and took them into the bottom half of the Championship. At that time I'd just won league 1 with Plymouth and applied for the job. I think the game gives you a bit more clout if you apply for the club that you register as the club you support at the beginning of the game because i got the job. Took Brighton up and spent 3 seasons turning them into a European force, before I let my contract run down. I spent over half a season unemployed because no juicy big clubs outside of England were available. So I joined RB Leipzig in Germany just to keep my oar in. They were rock bottom of the Bundesliga but I managed to get them into the last Euro cup spot on the last day of the season.
