[Misc] Mundane celebrity encounters

[Yes Chef]

Due to being close mates with Wiiilllll from TFI Friday, I actually have countless celebrity encounters from the all the shows I spent in the upstairs bar bit. However I’m going to discount all those, and instead do any other random ‘mundane’ meetings. That’s more in keeping with the spirit of the thread, I think.

My compulsory BHAFC one is that I twice served ex-Albion winger Neil Smillie in Reading ASDA. He was full of compliments for his time at the club.

On a packed Friday evening flight from LHR to Edinburgh once, I was pleased to see the middle seat next to me was the only empty seat. Right up to the moment we were about to push back from the gate, when on came then-PM Gordon Brown, who without the slightest fuss plonked his considerable frame into that Economy Class middle row middle seat and got on with some paperwork. Serious elbow tennis ensued.

Other random plane buddies include Louise Redknapp and Princess Michael of Kent. Though not on the same flight. Or directly next to me.

Like others, I have a ‘motorway service station’ plus ‘gents urinals’ story combo. Mine was the entire Leicester rugby union squad. Including Martin Johnson, the definition of a man giant. (And no I didn’t check out his ‘Johnson’.)

I went to the same schools as Eddie Izzard, so for the best part of 8 years he was around - though several years above me. He once told me off for trying to jump the lunch queue. I later returned the favour to Sussex & England cricketer Ed Giddins, who was a few years lower than me, and actually a bit of a cheeky shit at the time.

University was at Reading in the late 1980s, and then I hung around there for a few more years. As someone very much into music, I was therefore on nodding terms with local bands of the time such as Chapterhouse and Slowdive. I also did loads of gigs around then, so have the almost-inevitable ‘Miki from Lush’ anecdote too. This was being in the front row of a solo gig by Tanya Donelly in Harlesden, when someone started persistently digging and wriggling into my ribs in a determined effort to create a new space next to me, when there really wasn’t room. I turned round prepared to be pissed off, only to realize it was the aforementioned Miki from Lush. So I let her in. Being squashed up next to her for the next 90 minutes didn’t seem much of a hardship.

My first ever job was at a company run by ex-Nationwide presenter Michael Barratt. It was in Maidenhead, and he was very much ‘in’ with the Bray-dwelling 1970s-BBC-famous crowd. The likes of Ernie Wise and Michael Parkinson often dropped by to use the fax machine or share a Friday afternoon whisky. One of those three - I won’t reveal which - once made the unforgettable remark to me that “one of the biggest regrets of my life is that I’ve never made love to a black woman.”

For several years after I then worked for a company that did loads of work for Virgin. We frequently went to Richard Branson’s Notting Hill house to discuss projects with him, as well as attend his parties. Prince Andrew was at one of those. Dancing. He does sweat. Athlete Denise Lewis at another, stood on her own looking a bit lost. Fueled by the free Red Bull and Vodka promo, I decided to just go over and talk with her - she was really nice.

My current company does loads of work in Saudi Arabia, and I’ve presented stuff to MBS about a dozen times now. You rarely get more than a few minutes, so I’ve yet to make small chat about Newcastle Utd with him. Let alone murdered journalists and human rights etc. Maybe one day.

To finish on as rubbish a contribution as possible, I one wandered around IKEA at the same time as boxer Anthony Joshua. Sorry, can’t remember what he was buying, though appreciate that kind of detail makes these threads.

I can assure you, Ed Giddins learnt his lesson.

He was in front of me in a massive queue in Barbados airport when an attractive woman tried to flirt her way ahead in line - he sent her packing.


More (unrelated) Ed Giddins news- he tried to get off with my girlfriend in a ropey Eastbourne nightclub, the sneaky RAT

 

[Rugrat]

And, of course, I got my Hannah's mixed up with my Noeles.

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You had me worried there. Hannah Gordon = a finished off Fiona Bruce

 

[Happy Exile]

Was the Hannah Gordon encounter anywhere near Weybridge? I spoke to her in a hotel near there back in 1974. Lovely lady.

It was indeed

 

[El Presidente]

I once stood behind Animal from the Anti-Nowhere League at WH Smith on the M6. He bought some crinkle cut McCoys, a can of Tango and a copy of OK magazine for his missus.

 

[BN9 BHA]

I once stood behind Animal from the Anti-Nowhere League at WH Smith on the M6. He bought some crinkle cut McCoys, a can of Tango and a copy of OK magazine for his missus.

So what?

 

[Austrian Gull]

I saw Rick Wakeman outside Chichester cathedral just as I was making my way to the train station to go to Chelsea away in the league cup.

I said 'weren't you in a band in the 1970s?'

He said 'Yes'

Some of the above might not be entirely true

I saw him at Ely Cathedral!

 

[Soton Seagull]

Had a wee next to Robbie Coltrane at the Hove dog stadium in the mod 90s. No small talk etc, perfect mundanery!

 

[Soton Seagull]

Showed Supergrass singer Gaz Coombes to his prebooked seat at the odeon when I was back from uni and doing a summer job there.

 

[Herr Tubthumper]

As this thread isn’t really “mundane” l’ll rise above my Phil Mitchell in a municipal swimming pool and mention the musicians I have spotted on planes: Morrissey (spent a lot of time complaining), Hot Chip, in addition to Hot Chip as a group I have also seen Alexis Taylor on his own twice) The Kooks (yeah, I know, but they were on the flight , two of the Sex Pistols (I sat behind Paul Cook), Pete Tong, the guv’nor himself the late great Andrew Weatherall, Artic Monkeys plus management and some crew (I got very drunk with these guys).

 

[Jesus Gul]

Sir Paul Smith asked me if I was here to see him when peering into his Covent Garden shop on a deserted Saturday morning in the late 90s. I was killing time waiting to see a recruiter round the corner...always wondered where my career would have taken me if I'd taken a chance and said 'yes Paul'

 

[Guinness Boy]

Roly from Grange Hill asked me if i had any pills in The Gardening Club, Piccadilly in 1996.

Yeah he was an infamous clubber. So, believe it or not, was Chesney Hawkes.

He was in the Zap on the Friday of the first Love Parade weekend here (I can still remember Sister Bliss was DJing). Me and my brother thought it would be hilarious to take turns to annoy him, until his entourage got rather upset.

Yep. Chesney Hawkes had an entourage.

 

[Stumpy Tim]

I sat next to Judy Murray on an outside court at the US Open earlier this year. Some loud Americans started trying to talk to her but were shut down very quickly so I decided against saying anything. Fierce woman that one

 

[brighton terra]

Many years ago I was in the Queens Hotel gym and John Hannah was on the adjacent treadmil.

 

[The Lemming Stomper]

Charlie George tried to get a late dog bet on when I worked in the betting shop at Goodwood racecourse...

When he said ' do you know who I am? ' I replied ' the bloke who's not had a bet in this race'

 

[brighton terra]

My partners Dad was recently sat in a Hove cafe with Roger Taylor and Brian May. He was talking to them for ages without realising who they were. They were in town to sell a couple of guitars.

 

[brighton terra]

Vernon Kay and Tess Daly parked up outside our house in Robert Street and asked if parking was free on a Sunday.

 

[Herr Tubthumper]

Quite a few sports people over the years. Literally sat next to Pascal Gross on the Berlin flight one Sunday morning. I cannot think of many nicer people I have met; he was such a lovely guy and as I have already mentioned in other threads helped me with my German homework.

Another good one is a Xmas lunch over here a few years ago. One girl said her husband would be along later, when quizzed she said he was working, I asked what did he do to be working on Xmas day and a bit sheepishly said he was a sportsman. I pressed again and she said he was doing press (they played on Boxing Day). It turned out her husband is Niels Giffey who at the time was captain of the Berlin Alba basketball team and who recently won the basketball world cup with the national team. I know basketball isnt a big deal in the UK but it is over here. He was also a lovely guy, f***ing tall (even when he was seated he towered over me) and fun to be around. I got a bit drunk and spent some time waddling around in his massive trainers.

 

[Mellotron]

As this thread isn’t really “mundane” l’ll rise above my Phil Mitchell in a municipal swimming pool and mention the musicians I have spotted on planes: Morrissey (spent a lot of time complaining), Hot Chip, in addition to Hot Chip as a group I have also seen Alexis Taylor on his own twice) The Kooks (yeah, I know, but they were on the flight , two of the Sex Pistols (I sat behind Paul Cook), Pete Tong, the guv’nor himself the late great Andrew Weatherall, Artic Monkeys plus management and some crew (I got very drunk with these guys).

Ah you just reminded me.

At Latitude Festival 2008. Sigur Ros were playing. Me and my friends were enjoying them, but there were some chavs nearby taking the piss out of Jonsi’s high voice and generally being annoying and well, not what you expect in a Sigur Ros crowd.

The “chavs” turned out to be the Arctic Monkeys.

 

[Herr Tubthumper]

I also had a brief encounter with Ian Wright in Brighton. I was walking along New Road and there was a sudden down pour. I ran for cover, as did others, and ended up in a door way with Ian Wright and a couple of film crew. Rather startled I said 'you're Ian Wright' . He laughed and confidently said 'yes, I am'. He said he was filming something or other. The clouds broke and we both went on our way.

 

[Smirko]

Played Black Jack next to Stephen Mulhurn at the Grosvenor on the seafront a few years ago. Very amiable chap.