Julian Clary

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Danny-Boy

Banned
Apr 21, 2009
5,579
The Coast
Did anyone see Julian being interviewed on BBC South-East last night?

Just wondered if he spoke about his HIV scares.

Julian seems to think he was fortunate not to contract HIV, as at least two of his boyfriends did (they both died).

He says in his autobiography:

The fact that I did not contract the HIV virus during these years is entirely down to luck. I was young and gay and having sex with lots of different men, but I stopped having anal sex. This wasn’t a preventative measure on my part, but because I had an embarrassing problem that wouldn’t go away. A nasty business; anal warts.

It’s pointless speculating who gave them to me (this is a memoir, not a phone-book), but one penis I remember in particular may be the culprit. I met a skinhead type at Heaven (nightclub) who took me back to his South London council flat. He gave me a tab of acid and loosened his braces. We had sex for hours on his bed beneath an open window.

I remember watching the night sky lighten, the clouds drift past, dusk and then night again. I thought the trip would never end but I seemed unable to move from the bed. At one point I became enthralled with his penis and examined it closely. Tucked away under the folds of his foreskin were several mall, white, bogey-sized lumps. The clouds that floated by the window were now in the room with us, attached.

A month or so later a personal itching problem forced me to get a mirror, spread my bum cheeks and see what on earth the problem was. There were the small fleshy lumps again. A trip to the STD clinic named and shamed me as the carrier of anal warts. I was horrified…a weekly treatment of “Freezing” the little bastards ensued, but they seemed to flourish – fertilised, if anything by their ordeal, and ever increasing. After a while I learned to live with my dark discomfort and re-entered the sexual arena, sternly brushing away any gentleman caller’s hand or other body part that sought to investigate my nether regions.

Thus during those dangerous years my sexual activities did not, at least, put me in the high-risk category. That’s the only reason I’m still here, I suspect. Anal warts. God bless ‘em.


So there we have it. Our most pronounced homosexual performer suffered from anal warts. Can I claim this as a first mention of this affliction on NSC?
 






Icy Gull

Back on the rollercoaster
Jul 5, 2003
72,015
Too much information, the man has no shame. Why the f*** would you want to tell the world that??
 


Danny-Boy

Banned
Apr 21, 2009
5,579
The Coast
Too much information, the man has no shame. Why the f*** would you want to tell the world that??

The rest of the book "A Young Man's Passage" (sic) is full of the same candid quotes. I recommend it to any bi-curious males, it'll put you off the "scene" for lfe IMHO.
 


Icy Gull

Back on the rollercoaster
Jul 5, 2003
72,015
The rest of the book "A Young Man's Passage" (sic) is full of the same candid quotes. I recommend it to any bi-curious males, it'll put you off the "scene" for lfe IMHO.

f*** me he's even managed to find a grim title for the book as well :facepalm:.
 




Danny-Boy

Banned
Apr 21, 2009
5,579
The Coast
f*** me he's even managed to find a grim title for the book as well :facepalm:.

Yes I feel sorry for his Dad who was a police inspector apparently. Being the only son, I'm sure he must have LOVED seeing Jules grow up a bender, seemingly from the time he got a scholarship to a Catholic school in West London run by priests..say no more.
 


Was not Was

Loitering with intent
Jul 31, 2003
1,607
*points*

Sir, Sir - he said 'bender', Sir!
 






Elvis

Well-known member
Mar 22, 2010
1,413
Viva Las Hove
What! he's GAY!!!!!!
 


Gully

Monkey in a seagull suit.
Apr 24, 2004
16,812
Way out west
Yes I feel sorry for his Dad who was a police inspector apparently. Being the only son, I'm sure he must have LOVED seeing Jules grow up a bender, seemingly from the time he got a scholarship to a Catholic school in West London run by priests..say no more.

So you post something that is quite frankly disgusting and manage to throw in a bit of a homophobic jibe for good measure...which makes me wonder, having those views, why are you reading the autobiography of one of the most out men in Britain?
 


Danny-Boy

Banned
Apr 21, 2009
5,579
The Coast
So you post something that is quite frankly disgusting and manage to throw in a bit of a homophobic jibe for good measure...which makes me wonder, having those views, why are you reading the autobiography of one of the most out men in Britain?

I take it you've never read a book about Hitler, Stalin, Margaret Thatcher or any other person you consider to have been a force for evil rather than good then.

I posted what Clary wrote. And got published...
 




deletebeepbeepbeep

Well-known member
May 12, 2009
21,806
I take it you've never read a book about Hitler, Stalin, Margaret Thatcher or any other person you consider to have been a force for evil rather than good then.

I posted what Clary wrote. And got published...

Do you consider Julian Clary to be a force of evil? :shrug:
 


Danny-Boy

Banned
Apr 21, 2009
5,579
The Coast
Do you consider Julian Clary to be a force of evil? :shrug:

If his book expresses his inner mind about his sexual depravity, I guess I do. Mind you watching Frank Skinner's act on C4 earlier this week induced the same gut-wrenching feeling of utter nausea.

What is the common link? Both are TV "comedians" in a way that, unlike Norman Wisdom, you would not take your children to see. Or would you?:shrug:
 






deletebeepbeepbeep

Well-known member
May 12, 2009
21,806
Who played the homophobe card?

I haven't read Julians book but I don't think I would call engaging in permiscous activities and writing about them evil no.

Would you consider books of erotic high literature like The Story of the Eye evil?
 


Danny-Boy

Banned
Apr 21, 2009
5,579
The Coast
Who played the homophobe card?

I haven't read Julians book but I don't think I would call engaging in permiscous activities and writing about them evil no.

Would you consider books of erotic high literature like The Story of the Eye evil?

He's talking about me, Del-boy.

I would not know how to compare Clary's life-history with an erotic novel - I've never read "The Story of the Eye" (by the way is that the Hog's Eye?) but I am just sickened by Clary's glorification of his totally uncontrolled sexual behaviour at a time when everyone was being cautioned to exercise restraint.

The fact that two of his friends died should have told him something. But as far as I can see some gay men just go mad, mutiple sex acts in saunas etc. It's a form of ritualistic self-punishment if you ask me.

Clary overstepped the mark when in 1993, apparently just after one of his friends diedof AIDS, he co-hosted an awards ceremony at which then prominent MP Norman Lamont (then Chancellor) was in the audience.

Seeing him Clary decided to introduce his act with a risque joke:

"I've just been fusting Norman Lamont on Hampstead Heath." This was greeted with horror and the ensuing punch-line (ho-ho) was lost. Apparently it was "Talk about a red box...."

There was virtually a TV ban put on Clary for some years after this faux pass and only now is he seemingly been allowed onto chat shows again.
 


Nibble

New member
Jan 3, 2007
19,238
He's talking about me, Del-boy.

I would not know how to compare Clary's life-history with an erotic novel - I've never read "The Story of the Eye" (by the way is that the Hog's Eye?) but I am just sickened by Clary's glorification of his totally uncontrolled sexual behaviour at a time when everyone was being cautioned to exercise restraint.

The fact that two of his friends died should have told him something. But as far as I can see some gay men just go mad, mutiple sex acts in saunas etc. It's a form of ritualistic self-punishment if you ask me.

Clary overstepped the mark when in 1993, apparently just after one of his friends diedof AIDS, he co-hosted an awards ceremony at which then prominent MP Norman Lamont (then Chancellor) was in the audience.

Seeing him Clary decided to introduce his act with a risque joke:

"I've just been fusting Norman Lamont on Hampstead Heath." This was greeted with horror and the ensuing punch-line (ho-ho) was lost. Apparently it was "Talk about a red box...."

There was virtually a TV ban put on Clary for some years after this faux pass and only now is he seemingly been allowed onto chat shows again.

You are sexually repressed.
 


seagullsovergrimsby

#cpfctinpotclub
Aug 21, 2005
43,947
Crap Town
The punchline makes it into a joke rather than a statement on Norman Lamont's preferences which were being questioned at the time.
 




Danny-Boy

Banned
Apr 21, 2009
5,579
The Coast
You are sexually repressed.

Unfortunately a lot of people on NSC are anally repressed, and a lot more aren't.

I'm just a grumpy old man, who's having to get my kicks at the moment from wiping my faeces with little wooden sticks and post them off to see if I have Cancer or not.

But I haven't got anal warts though.
 




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