[Misc] Joke Du Jour

[Eeyore]

I found a couple of weevils in the house yesterday.

One of them had chewed through my furniture, the other was generally just striding around the house and having the odd nibble.

My neighbour asked me why I only threw the first one out.

I said it was because it was the lesser of two weevils.

 

[Tim Over Whelmed]

Do you not worry that the second weevil could become more troublesome and don’t you think your neighbour is becoming a little nosey?

 

[KZNSeagull]

Since when do Weevils stride? What a load of old tosh.

 

[Eeyore]

Do you not worry that the second weevil could become more troublesome and don’t you think your neighbour is becoming a little nosey?

Not at all. I'm out for the day. She said 'Weevil keep any eye on it for you'

 

[jakarta]

Not at all. I'm out for the day. She said 'Weevil keep any eye on it for you'

I'm presuming you have watched Master and Commander?

 

[Happy Exile]

Weevils will typically only eat damp or decaying wood so it's quite unusual for them to be tucking into your furniture. I'd suggest that weevil did you a favour by illustrating potential structural damp issues with your house but certainly by showing you that your furniture is in need of replacing. A timely insect intervention for sure.

 

[albionant]

Since when do Weevils stride? What a load of old tosh.

They wobble, but they don't fall down ........

 

[Stato]

I found a couple of weevils in the house yesterday.

One of them had chewed through my furniture, the other was generally just striding around the house and having the odd nibble.

My neighbour asked me why I only threw the first one out.

I said it was because it was the lesser of two weevils.

Surely the second, lazier one was the lesser of the two weevils.

 

[Bry Nylon]

Surely the second, lazier one was the lesser of the two weevils.

I concur.

I think for the joke to work in its literal sense, then @Eeyore has thrown out the wrong weevil.

 

[Guinness Boy]

Hans is weevil.

Doug too.

 

[Bodian]

It's mainly the larvae that do the damage - so there's little point in throwing out any adult weevil.

 

[MJsGhost]

Weevils will typically only eat damp or decaying wood so it's quite unusual for them to be tucking into your furniture. I'd suggest that weevil did you a favour by illustrating potential structural damp issues with your house but certainly by showing you that your furniture is in need of replacing. A timely insect intervention for sure.

Have you seen Eeyore's house?

 

[Nobby]

You've made a big mistake here - the second one could be thousands before you know it.

How do you get rid of weevils naturally?

Answer: Okay, there are several ‘tricks’ that can be used - for containers, make sure that the container seals tightly. Whether it is a screw top or otherwise - I find that if I get a dried bay leaf (Laurus nobilis) and tape it to the inside of the lid it prevents weevils from entering they reall...

www.quora.com

 

[Flounce]

I found a couple of weevils in the house yesterday.

One of them had chewed through my furniture, the other was generally just striding around the house and having the odd nibble.

My neighbour asked me why I only threw the first one out.

I said it was because it was the lesser of two weevils.

I heard a joke with exactly the same punchline whilst watching Master and Commander on Saturday

 

[el punal]

This joke is so old - weevil been there.

 

[Questions]

Since when do Weevils stride? What a load of old tosh.

Www.stridingweevils

 

[Jack Straw]

 

[smillie's garden]

Any relation to Wee Villy Gilmour?

 

[Eeyore]

I heard a joke with exactly the same punchline whilst watching Master and Commander on Saturday

I must have heard it from someone who heard it whilst watching watching Master and Commander on Saturday.

 

[Cotton Socks]

Do you have giant weevils or something?? I've only ever seen weevils in flour when my mum was going to make a pie for the first time in a year. That involved her blowing inside the flour bag and then sending me to the shop. They didn't even chew through a paper bag!