[Humour] Joke du Jour..

[The Clamp]

A woman rings 999

What’s your emergency?

I think my husband is dead

Okay, follow my instructions. Please go and make sure he is dead.

A brief silence followed by a loud bang!

Okay, I’ve done that. Now what?

 

[Dick Swiveller]

I hope she called the Gas board as that bang could have been a gas explosion. Terrible if her husband died and she lost her house.

RIP husband.

 

[Foul Play Rocks]

Very sad story.
#prayforhusband

 

[Thunder Bolt]

I've watched that series Ambulance. The first thing they always say is 'Is the patient breathing'.

 

[Highfields Seagull]

Surely the operator would follow the pre-determined standard script.

 

[Gazwag]

Very strange that a professional emergency services call operator would expect a lay person to ascertain if a person is dead or not

 

[Bry Nylon]

I've watched that series Ambulance. The first thing they always say is 'Is the patient breathing'.

A woman rings 999

What’s your emergency?

I think my husband is dead

Okay, follow my instructions. Is the patient breathing?

A brief silence followed by a loud bang!

Okay, I’ve done that. Now what?

Nope. Doesn't work as well like this.

 

[Peter Ward]

Everyone on here today seems to have developed Aspergers syndrome. By the way, who led the Pedants Revolt? Which Tyler.

 

[essbee1]

A definition of a joke for the benefit of Clampie:

"A thing that someone says or writes to cause amusement or laughter, especially a story with a funny punchline".

Please try again.

 

[The Clamp]

Nope. Doesn't work as well like this.

I know emergency calls don’t follow the joke’s procedure. It would be quite a long drawn out and unfunny joke if it did! ��

 

[The Clamp]

A definition of a joke for the benefit of Clampie:

"A thing that someone says or writes to cause amusement or laughter, especially a story with a funny punchline".

Please try again.

Yet voted the funniest joke in the world. I am as shocked as you are.

Genuinely voted funniest joke ever.


By everyone


Ever


Everyone

 

[KZNSeagull]

The emergency operator is complicit in a crime here. I trust that they and the wife are prosecuted to the full extent of the law.

 

[essbee1]

Yet voted the funniest joke in the world. I am as shocked as you are.

Genuinely voted funniest joke ever.


By everyone


Ever


Everyone

Fair enough Clampo.

Here's my defense: 'My other half loves Birds of a Feather - laughs uncontrollably at it. Perhaps the people voting were of the same ilk'. QED.

(btw I would rather stick needles in my nackers than sit through an episode of that sh*te)

 

[LlcoolJ]

Fair enough Clampo.

Here's my defense: 'My other half loves Birds of a Feather - laughs uncontrollably at it. Perhaps the people voting were of the same ilk'. QED.

(btw I would rather stick needles in my nackers than sit through an episode of that sh*te)

The rules of NSC state that any mention of dreadful TV sitcoms is replied to with "What about that Mrs Brown's Boys? It shit!". So there you go.

 

[Jack Straw]

Can you have more than one "Joke du Jour" in one day?

 

[Mo Gosfield]

Everyone on here today seems to have developed Aspergers syndrome. By the way, who led the Pedants Revolt? Which Tyler.

I sincerely hope not. As a father of a sufferer, I know what it means. On a personal level it touches a raw nerve when it is used as a throwaway line, trying to be clever.

 

[Gazwag]

Yet voted the funniest joke in the world. I am as shocked as you are.

Genuinely voted funniest joke ever.


By everyone


Ever


Everyone

I bet it wouldn't have if it was the husband on the phone....

 

[B52]

A woman rings 999

What’s your emergency?

I think my husband is dead

Okay, follow my instructions. Please go and make sure he is dead.

A brief silence followed by a loud bang!

Okay, I’ve done that. Now what?

Well I thought it was amusing, so there!

 

[Tim Over Whelmed]

Can you have more than one "Joke du Jour" in one day?

Non

 

[essbee1]

Well I thought it was amusing, so there!

Do you like Birds of a Feather?