[Humour] Joke Du Jour

[Guinness Boy]

A software developer walked into a bar, but he couldn't buy a drink because he'd run out of cache.

So he leaves the bar and heads to a pet shop. “Have you got a Python?” he asks. “I’m sorry sir, our last one escaped to java” cones the reply. The developer says “Was that his cage? Looks a bit basic”.

Just thought I’d write a sequl for you.

 

[essbee1]

So he leaves the bar and heads to a pet shop. “Have you got a Python?” he asks. “I’m sorry sir, our last one escaped to java” cones the reply. The developer says “Was that his cage? Looks a bit basic”.

Just thought I’d write a sequl for you.

Despite having no money he still feels quite JOVIAL. go FORTH he thinks to himself and thinks about ringing his friend MIRANDA to cheer himself up. Let down once more
he thinks to himself oh 'f OCCAM' all.

 

[Bodian]

Surely he wouldn't 'run out of cache' would he? He'd actually have 'filled his cache'.

 

[Birdie Boy]

Maybe it was a RAM issue and he forgot his cache.

 

[FatSuperman]

A software developer walked into a bear, but he couldn't buy a drink because he'd run out of cache.

I think that may be the bear from this story;

A bear is quietly drinking a pint in his local, when a ‘lady of negotiable affections’ approaches him and asks if he’d like a good time. He growls at her to go away and carries on enjoying his pint. A short while later the woman returns and makes the same offer. He roars at her that he is not interested and she wanders off. After another brief pause she comes back to ask for a third time, this time she doesn’t finish her sentence before the bear gobbles her up and washes the snack down with the rest of his beer!
He signals to the bar tender that he’d like another drink.
The bartender says “no, we don’t serve druggies in here”.
The bear responds that he’s never taken drugs.
“Yes you do”, says the barman... “that was a ‘bar bitch you ate’”


TRUE STORY

 

[essbee1]

I think that may be the bear from this story;

A bear is quietly drinking a pint in his local, when a ‘lady of negotiable affections’ approaches him and asks if he’d like a good time. He growls at her to go away and carries on enjoying his pint. A short while later the woman returns and makes the same offer. He roars at her that he is not interested and she wanders off. After another brief pause she comes back to ask for a third time, this time she doesn’t finish her sentence before the bear gobbles her up and washes the snack down with the rest of his beer!
He signals to the bar tender that he’d like another drink.
The bartender says “no, we don’t serve druggies in here”.
The bear responds that he’s never taken drugs.
“Yes you do”, says the barman... “that was a ‘bar bitch you ate’”


TRUE STORY

Well, there's 30 seconds of my life I can't get back.

 

[FatSuperman]

Well, there's 30 seconds of my life I can't get back.

That is the unique angle I’m going for in my bid for poster of the year 2019

 

[Wellesley]

I tried paying contactless once but I couldn't see a thing.

 

[Jack Straw]

Well, there's 30 seconds of my life I can't get back.

I didn't mind 30 seconds on that. Quite a good effort I thought. Reminded of me of why there's no head-ache pills in the jungle.

 

[essbee1]

I didn't mind 30 seconds on that. Quite a good effort I thought. Reminded of me of why there's no head-ache pills in the jungle.[/QUOTE

Are the parrots allergic to ibuprofen?

 

[Jack Straw]

I didn't mind 30 seconds on that. Quite a good effort I thought. Reminded of me of why there's no head-ache pills in the jungle.[/QUOTE

Are the parrots allergic to ibuprofen?

No, they just can't get hold of any.

 

[Eeyore]

Is there not a recovery program he could run ? Surely his cache is not lost. Can't the bar man hold on ?