Joke du jour

[Soul Finger]

I met a 14-year-old girl on the internet. She was clever, funny, flirty and sexy, so I suggested we meet up.

She turned out to be an undercover detective.

How cool is that at her age?!

 

[Scoffers]

a pair of jump leads go in to a bar, the barman says, I'll serve you, but don't start anything

 

[Superphil]

2 bits of tarmac sat in the pub having a beer when a red piece of tarmac walks in. The first bit of tarmac says to the other "Don't mess with him, he's a cyclepath"

 

[SuperMario]

Two Palace slappers work in a hairdressers bloke walks in with dandruff, one slapper saids give him " head and shoulders" the other one looks confused and saids how do you give "shoulders"?

 

[Race]

I couldn't find the way out of a multi-storey car park once and stopped to ask this white-haired woman.

Amazingly, it was 80s singer Yazz.

Waste of f***ing time.

 

[El Presidente]

Ryan Giggs and his brother go to a bar.

The barman asks them what they want..

Ryan says "I'll have whatever he's having"

 

[Race]

i had my picture taken with R.E.M the other day

thats me in the corner

 

[Seagull on the wing]

Ryan Giggs and his brother go to a bar.

The barman asks them what they want..

Ryan says "I'll have whatever he's having"

Nice....very topical!

 

[tedlit]

2 bits of tarmac sat in the pub having a beer when a red piece of tarmac walks in. The first bit of tarmac says to the other "Don't mess with him, he's a cyclepath"

For some reason, I can't stop laughing at this. Well done.

 

[DIRK STEELE]