Joke du Jour

[The Timekeeper]

The Silent Fart

An elderly couple was attending church services.

About halfway through, she leaned over and whispered to her husband,

'I just let out a long silent fart. What do you think I should do?

He replied, 'Put a new battery in your hearing aid.'

 

[Simster]

So when are you telling the joke then?

 

[The Timekeeper]

? Mmmm

 

[Marc]

that...joke...was...SHITHOUSE!

 

[Dick Knights Mumm]

I liked it.

 

[Flavor Flav]

lol brilliant

 

[Jimmy Grimble]

Not bad that.

 

[Icy Gull]

Probably based on a factual occurence, still pretty lame though.

 

[¤DãŃn¥ §êãGüLL¤]

Your joke sucks bro, sorry.

 

[Robot Chicken]

I'm one of those people that likes to have a shit while I'm reading.

This is also the reason why I'm banned from Waterstones.

 

[SeagullTim]

I'm one of those people that likes to have a shit while I'm reading.

This is also the reason why I'm banned from Waterstones.

Fan of sickipedia are we?

 

[Robot Chicken]

Fan of sickipedia are we?

Caught in the act

 

[Happy Seagull]

Subject: Morality test
This test only has one question, but it's a very important one. By giving an honest answer, you will discover where you stand morally. The test features an unlikely, completely fictional situation in which you will have to make a decision. Remember that your answer needs to be honest, yet spontaneous. Please scroll down slowly and give due consideration to each line.

THE SITUATION:

You are in England , York to be specific.
There is chaos all around you caused by a hurricane with severe flooding.
This is a flood of biblical proportions.
You are a photo-journalist working for a major newspaper, and you're caught in the middle of this epic disaster. The situation is nearly hopeless.
You're trying to shoot career-making photos.
There are houses and people swirling around you, some disappearing into the water.
Nature is unleashing all of its destructive fury.

THE TEST:

Suddenly, you see a man in the water.
He is fighting for his life, trying not to be taken down with the debris.
You move closer... Somehow, the man looks familiar...
You suddenly realize who it is... It's Gordon Brown!
You notice that the raging waters are about to take him under forever.
You have two options:
You can save the life of Gordon Brown or you can shoot a dramatic Pulitzer Prize winning photo, documenting the death of one of the country's most powerful men!

THE QUESTION:

Here's the question, and please give an honest answer...

Would you select high contrast colour film, or would you go with the classic simplicity of black and white?

 

[Skint Gull]

I actually thought the joke was pretty funny. I'm afraid Happy's joke was bloody awful mind you, just about as predictable as they come

 

[Questions]

Subject: Morality test
This test only has one question, but it's a very important one. By giving an honest answer, you will discover where you stand morally. The test features an unlikely, completely fictional situation in which you will have to make a decision. Remember that your answer needs to be honest, yet spontaneous. Please scroll down slowly and give due consideration to each line.

THE SITUATION:

You are in England , York to be specific.
There is chaos all around you caused by a hurricane with severe flooding.
This is a flood of biblical proportions.
You are a photo-journalist working for a major newspaper, and you're caught in the middle of this epic disaster. The situation is nearly hopeless.
You're trying to shoot career-making photos.
There are houses and people swirling around you, some disappearing into the water.
Nature is unleashing all of its destructive fury.

THE TEST:

Suddenly, you see a man in the water.
He is fighting for his life, trying not to be taken down with the debris.
You move closer... Somehow, the man looks familiar...
You suddenly realize who it is... It's Gordon Brown!
You notice that the raging waters are about to take him under forever.
You have two options:
You can save the life of Gordon Brown or you can shoot a dramatic Pulitzer Prize winning photo, documenting the death of one of the country's most powerful men!

THE QUESTION:

Here's the question, and please give an honest answer...

Would you select high contrast colour film, or would you go with the classic simplicity of black and white?

Surely with a digital SLR there is no film so the choice of ASA or Din would not come into it.
And you would be taking digital if you needed to send the shots to a newspaper.
I would though be considering shutter speed priority with a drowning.