I've just had the worst two weeks off my life.

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dougdeep

New member
May 9, 2004
37,732
SUNNY SEAFORD
Just give her some space Kev, she may come around. Sorry to hear your sad news.
 




Sorry to hear your news. Whilst BHA binds us all, we are like one big extended family & if you feel that you need to air your feelings on this site, then there are enough of us who are mature & experienced to give advice in all facets of life.

My wife & I who have been married for 19 years have regrettably gone through 4 miscarriages, but we do have a lovely lad.

Life is a roller coaster & we don't always get what we want or hope for. It can also be horribly unfair & cruel.

Chin up, things will get better. Time really is a healer. The pain will always be there but the sharpnest will fade.

I hope in some small way I have been able to help
 




vegster

Sanity Clause
May 5, 2008
28,274
Bad luck Basil, I'm afraid to say that life does give everyone a serious kick in the balls from time to time. I, most certainly have had my heart broken before and it was devastating at the time. It will get better, have faith.

However its important not to descend to the level where you find yourself becoming an amateur film buff who works as an independant mortgage broker who thinks he can tip racehorses......that way lies the Dark Side...
 


patchamalbion

Well-known member
Feb 26, 2009
6,020
brighton
Thanks Wardy, I've got to now pluck up the courage and delete her from my Facebook and MSN. Should be fun, I'm not even on MSN at the moment because if I go on there, I will most probably say something regretful....

at times like this i wouldnt worry about facebook and msn,and i wouldnt delete her yet,she might change her mind and you will surely have to talk
 




Basil Fawlty

Don't Mention The War
at times like this i wouldnt worry about facebook and msn,and i wouldnt delete her yet,she might change her mind and you will surely have to talk

Tried that, before she went for her operation. She said I don't care about her and her boyfriend does, he gives more a shit then you do etc. I got a ear bashing from her in three texts, then Friday after I laid my heart down on the line for her the Thursday night when I was smashed, all I got from her was that I love my boyfriend and all this crap.
 


patchamalbion

Well-known member
Feb 26, 2009
6,020
brighton
Tried that, before she went for her operation. She said I don't care about her and her boyfriend does, he gives more a shit then you do etc. I got a ear bashing from her in three texts, then Friday after I laid my heart down on the line for her the Thursday night when I was smashed, all I got from her was that I love my boyfriend and all this crap.

sounds harsh but she doesnt sound like shes worth the effort then lad! the miscarriage is something you will never forget and is a horrible horrible situation but maybe time to rid your hands of her and get over it
 


Easy 10

Brain dead MUG SHEEP
Jul 5, 2003
62,429
Location Location
It doesn't sound to me as though either of you are ready to bring a child into the world.
As others have said, time is a great healer and this probably was just not meant to be. In the long run, you'll be ok. From what I know of you fella, you're far too young to go getting yourself tied down right now.

Enjoy life. Don't rush into responsibilty, because once you do, its with you forever. You've got YEARS in front of you before you think about settling down with kids.
 




little al

Crystal Palace fan
Apr 4, 2009
3,628
Aberdeen, United Kingdom
sounds harsh but she doesnt sound like shes worth the effort then lad! the miscarriage is something you will never forget and is a horrible horrible situation but maybe time to rid your hands of her and get over it

Easier said than done though. Most of us have been through the heartbreaking stage, and nothing anyone says makes it better. Time is a healer as the old saying goes, and its true, but thats not what he will believe at the moment unfortunately.

Take care geezer.
 


Wozza

Custom title
NSC Patron
Jul 6, 2003
24,389
Minteh Wonderland
Kev, if she was already off with someone else, having a baby together wouldn't have made you a couple. It wouldn't have made her love you.

It won't feel like it now, but in years to come you'll realise you've had a lucky escape.
 


tedebear

Legal Alien
NSC Patron
Jul 7, 2003
17,117
In my computer
Tried that, before she went for her operation. She said I don't care about her and her boyfriend does, he gives more a shit then you do etc. I got a ear bashing from her in three texts, then Friday after I laid my heart down on the line for her the Thursday night when I was smashed, all I got from her was that I love my boyfriend and all this crap.

Thats harsh Kev., but she's moved on and so must you. Remember what it feels like and don't give your heart away so freely next time until you're sure.

She wasn't for you, its obvious to us, but it will take time before its obvious to you.

P.S. Thanks for always having a smile and a thanks when you serve us at the tills - I keep meaning to tell you who we are but I think you may know...
 




shwoody1

Member
May 18, 2009
447
lewes
similar happened to me mate 10 years ago. now married with 2 0f my own and 2 boys that arent, but they are mine all 4 of them and love them all the same. i remember the exes mum saying it wasnt meant to be, at the time i could of throttled her but she was right, i am sure that in years to come you will have a happy ending to, i still sometimes wonder about the lost child but 1 look at what i have makes me realise how lucky i am, all the very best to you mate.
 




Shinbreath

Member
Nov 1, 2008
512
Hove...
Wow BF... You have just shared something pretty personal and to feel like you can do that with us means something.

At the end of the day we are one big family and should be there for one another come what may. Sometimes tragedies bring people closer and therefore through something bad comes something good.

I hope that everything ends up ok for you. All I can say is that there are times for happiness and times for sadness... You are clearly going through a time of despair but believe me that sometime in the future, there will be a time for happiness and laughter. It might not be now but the time will come.. Just hang on in there and believe it !!!

You will be happy again but you just gotta get through this. I'm sure your strong enough and if you stick with us, we'll see you alright...
 




Beach Hut

Brighton Bhuna Boy
Jul 5, 2003
72,327
Living In a Box
It's very unlucky Kev however as stated several others have been in this position including my wife who had a mis-carriage prior to Mini arriving.

Although upsetting at the time I tended to take the view this was what happened for some reason and moved on as you will.

It will take time however everything will appear much better in the not too distant future.
 




Beach Hut

Brighton Bhuna Boy
Jul 5, 2003
72,327
Living In a Box
Now it doesn't help when one of her friends is trying to accuse me off blaming her!

I suggest you have a time out for a couple of weeks from Facebook / MSN etc and do some quality thinking about what you want.

Wasn't this the one who suddenly decided she did not want to go to Turkey a year or so ago after you had paid for a holiday ?
 


alan partridge

Active member
Jul 7, 2003
5,256
Linton Travel Tavern
step back mate...for a long time. It will hurt for ages but eventually it won't

in the mean time, don't do/say anything you will regret in the future
 






Fazz62

New member
Aug 27, 2008
1,262
As some of you might know, or didn't know. I was going to be a father, but she had a miscarriage last month. To anyone who has been there and tried to get over it I salute you. But that isn't the worst of it. The mother of my child, the girl I loved broke my heart into smithereens. I don't care anymore if she reads this all not, but after laying my heart on the line to her last Thursday night, she breaks my heart and I seriously have been trying to get over her and what happened. I think I've finally succeeded, people have said it was for the best not to have a child with her, but it would off been amazing to be a father but it wasn't mean't to be. But what she did to me and saying she can't be FRIENDS with me if I love her and it would be to awkward is plain bollocks!!!!!

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