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[Brighton] Is Portslade any fun?









Live by the sea

Well-known member
Oct 21, 2016
4,718
Pizza varies a lot . There’s the nasty tastes like processed muck from the likes of Dominios etc or there is some decent more homemade style from the likes of morelle zorelle ( spelt wrong probably) .

We have Don Filippo Restaurant on the upper east side on Lexington’s that serves heavenly pizzas !
I do miss them .
 








marlowe

Well-known member
Dec 13, 2015
4,293
........

My primary hobbies include:
- Football
- Drinking
- Smoking all sorts of things (not massively important but a plus)
- Women
- Walking in nature
......

If you expect our help and guidance you need to be a bit more specific regarding your hobbies and interests, especially with respect to women, which I see you have listed amongst your hobbies.

Are you interested in women with a view to social and/or sexual intercourse with them, or does your interest only extend to sidling up to them in confined spaces and sniffing their hair?

If it's the former I'm afraid I can't offer any advice, but if it's the latter I'll be only too pleased to offer any help and guidance you need.
 


Cowfold Seagull

Fan of the 17 bus
Apr 22, 2009
22,114
Cowfold
I guess you've never had a decent pizza.

It's all down to personal taste l suppose. The only time l have eaten a decent one was in Naples, where of course the pizza originated. So may pizzas that one can buy here though have very little resemblance to that.

I believe the thick crust variety so popular here was an American bastardized version of the original invention.
 


Bakero

Languidly clinical
Oct 9, 2010
14,883
Almería
It's all down to personal taste l suppose. The only time l have eaten a decent one was in Naples, where of course the pizza originated. So may pizzas that one can buy here though have very little resemblance to that.

I believe the thick crust variety so popular here was an American bastardized version of the original invention.

There's been a pizza revolution in the last 10 years or so. Plenty of places now do a more than passable neapolitan style pizza. Not sure where your best option is from Cowfold but I'm sure someone can point you in the right direction.
 




Cowfold Seagull

Fan of the 17 bus
Apr 22, 2009
22,114
Cowfold
There's been a pizza revolution in the last 10 years or so. Plenty of places now do a more than passable neapolitan style pizza. Not sure where your best option is from Cowfold but I'm sure someone can point you in the right direction.

Heyyy l'm sure you are absolutely right, I'm told there is a good one at Preston Circus, Fatto Mano l believe it's called, actually run by Italians l believe.

As l say though it all comes down to personal taste, when it comes to fast food l love fish and chips, pizza not so much.

Enjoy your napolitana or pepperoni, or whatever variety you like, it's just not for me!
 


Bakero

Languidly clinical
Oct 9, 2010
14,883
Almería
Heyyy l'm sure you are absolutely right, I'm told there is a good one at Preston Circus, Fatto Mano l believe it's called, actually run by Italians l believe.

As l say though it all comes down to personal taste, when it comes to fast food l love fish and chips, pizza not so much.

Enjoy your napolitana or pepperoni, or whatever variety you like, it's just not for me!

I think we're on the same page. I've no idea why people go for Domino's when there are so many better options, but as you say, each to their own.
 


BN41Albion

Well-known member
Oct 1, 2017
6,826
It's all down to personal taste l suppose. The only time l have eaten a decent one was in Naples, where of course the pizza originated. So may pizzas that one can buy here though have very little resemblance to that.

I believe the thick crust variety so popular here
was an American bastardized version of the original invention.

When was the last time you ordered a pizza?! Vast majority of pizza places sell thin crust neapolitan style pizza here!
 




fork me

I have changed this
Oct 22, 2003
2,147
Gate 3, Limassol, Cyprus
I'm thinking about doing this thing - https://www.folkhogskola-england.se/ - studying on a "folk high school", three months in Sweden and three months (28 March to June something) in Portslade. While it says it is only 8 minutes by train from Brighton (and one hour from London but who wants to go there?), if I know myself correctly I'll primarly spend my days within walking distance, meaning the joys of Portslade would be important.

My primary hobbies include:
- Football
- Drinking
- Smoking all sorts of things (not massively important but a plus)
- Women
- Walking in nature

So basically I'm wondering if there is any local football team there? Any good pubs? Are people in Portslade the... smoking kind of people? Are the ladies nice? Is there some good parks and other recreational areas?

There's some OK pubs in Portslade, but there's nothing to keep you there. The bus to Brighton goes from almost right outside the Swedish folk high school so it really isn't any bother.

As for women, unless things have changed drastically over the last 30 years you'll find them inside the Swedish Folk High School....
 


monty uk

Well-known member
Sep 25, 2018
641
In this marvellous tourist guide to Portslade there is no mention yet of Portslade’s finest attraction.

The Camera Obscura in Foredown Tower, perched high on the hillock that is north Portslade.

It is, according to the website, no less than “the largest Camera Obscura in the South East.” Of two. Though why the south East of England should need more than one is a moot point. Importantly, “There is a toilet”.

The building also doubled as the water tower for a hospital for infectious diseases last century. This may, or may not, be relevant to the last point.

Known around the world (at least in places to which people have escaped from Portslade) this unique attraction (it’s the only attraction in Portslade since Aldi is shut and the blue plaque to HWT, the musical guru of NSC, has not yet been attached to a suburban wall lower down the hillock) is a fine example illustrating the magic of lenses and mirrors that projects an outside view onto a table in a darkened room. The image, I can vouch although memory fades after 50-odd years, is identical to that seen by looking out of the windows – yet smaller and not quite so easy to see. Quaint though.

It is 100% more popular than the Royal Pavilion, (since I have never been). And on a par with Hove Museum (which I have also been to once). And of far greater interest than that dreadful Booth Museum of poor dead stuffed animals in Dyke Road. But not so good as the Engineerium – although each to their own of course.

Quite why it hasn’t yet featured in this marvellous travelogue (eat your heart out Palin and your scruffy Bradshaw) is unfathomable. Perhaps Portslade, nay the whole of the South East of England, is not ready for it.

Swanny, dear Swanssonn, are you?

By the way, it’s not open to any old bod. You have to make special arrangements to visit. Only the select few may go.
 


Eeyore

Colonel Hee-Haw of Queen's Park
NSC Patron
Apr 5, 2014
25,901
This is incorrect.

There are lots of women here who are under 55 and 16 stone.

But they're all lesbians.

Big Bertha of Bampfield Street is 54 and sways both ways.

I'll forward her details to Swanny. She cooks a mean quiche.

I'll give his details to large Larry too. Can't be choosy at 2am. Swanny can have a smoke too. Just to numb himself.
 




birthofanorange

Well-known member
NSC Patron
Aug 31, 2011
6,499
David Gilmour's armpit
I'm thinking about doing this thing - https://www.folkhogskola-england.se/ - studying on a "folk high school", three months in Sweden and three months (28 March to June something) in Portslade. While it says it is only 8 minutes by train from Brighton (and one hour from London but who wants to go there?), if I know myself correctly I'll primarly spend my days within walking distance, meaning the joys of Portslade would be important.

My primary hobbies include:
- Football
- Drinking
- Smoking all sorts of things (not massively important but a plus)
- Women
- Walking in nature

So basically I'm wondering if there is any local football team there? Any good pubs? Are people in Portslade the... smoking kind of people? Are the ladies nice? Is there some good parks and other recreational areas?

My better half did exactly that (she's from Svappavaara). It really IS shit - she moved in with me, from Portslade to Hove (having attended the 'folk high school') within a few days of meeting me. 20 years on, she's still here. :)
My advice, stay where you if you like pizzas and puff - you'll thank me one day.
 


Whitechapel

Famous Last Words
Jul 19, 2014
4,408
Not in Whitechapel
I think we're on the same page. I've no idea why people go for Domino's when there are so many better options, but as you say, each to their own.

To be fair I don’t order Dominos if I fancy pizza. I order Dominos if I’m hanging out my arse and need something greasy to make me feel slightly more human. I’d assume a fair chunk of their business is because of that. Although I’ve stopped buying Dominos entirely since they stopped doing the double decadence base - an absolute travesty. :(
 


Swansman

Pro-peace
May 13, 2019
22,320
Sweden
Short update... I've decided to do this and this weekend I will be moving to a folk school on some island here in Sweden for two months before heading down to England. Excited!
 






Guinness Boy

Tofu eating wokerati
Helpful Moderator
NSC Patron
Jul 23, 2003
37,339
Up and Coming Sunny Portslade
Short update... I've decided to do this and this weekend I will be moving to a folk school on some island here in Sweden for two months before heading down to England. Excited!

You should probably be aware of the "no horses" local by-law that's just come in here. Very strictly enforced by the killer dogs they keep for Swedes in the pub.
 


MattBackHome

Well-known member
Jul 7, 2003
11,873
Bad timing - we've just banned all smoking here and all women have been forcibly deported to Southwick
 


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