Jack Straw
I look nothing like him!
I stayed there once. The staff were all dressed in black, and none of them seemed to know what to do. There must have been builders in, because there was this relentless "thump-thump" noise whilst I was there.
One evening, a fire broke out in the kitchen, apparently it was arson. I watched whilst all the staff were quickly evacuated from there. Everyone got out safely, apart from one person, who must have been a contractor working there, as he was wearing shorts and a colourful top. This poor person must have had mobility issues, as every few yards, he fell over. I really felt sorry for him, especially when I saw him later, sitting on the floor crying his eyes out.