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If you don't drink that much and go out with people who are borderline alcoholic....



Westdene Seagull

aka Cap'n Carl Firecrotch
NSC Patron
Oct 27, 2003
21,526
The arse end of Hangleton
For goodness sake get off your high horse. I've been down that road in helping. There's very little you can do to help an alcoholic. Unless THEY really want to give it up(few do) you are wasting your time.

Which shows how much you know, diddly squat. You must have been such a help with so little empathy, sympathy and understanding.
 




W.C.

New member
Oct 31, 2011
4,927
Up until getting shingles a couple of years back at 43 I had been a bit of a weekender from my teens. Then became a father last May so in even more and my tolerance has gone right down.
Mum and baby went away for a few days last week and I thought ooh, I'll have a couple of nights out. Had one, felt like shit the next day, when it came round to Saturday and my 2nd planned jolly, I just stayed in.

Partay!

As said people can get a bit funny when friends don't drink. Guilty of it myself. We tend to cane it a bit too much in the UK.
 


Biscuit

Native Creative
Jul 8, 2003
22,319
Brighton
I used to drink a fair bit while at University. Especially on Friday and Saturdays. As I've grown up, got a proper job, mortgage, baby etc I don't find the time, let alone the money to indulge in such a lifestyle. A couple of ex-housemates are still chasing the dragon at 35+, going out whenever they can and getting into a right state. They surround themselves with others of the same ilk, I think it makes them feel less like alcoholics - which they are - just functioning ones.

I'll have the occasional rum at home when the time is right, and through work/social circle I'll have the occasional big night - but that's all it is, occasional!

I must admit, having 'grown up' and out of it, I am a little too judgmental of people who still indulge in such a lifestyle,
 




cheshunt seagull

Well-known member
Jul 5, 2003
2,594
It can be a problem if you are drinking in rounds, particularly if your downgrading from pint to half or soft drink co-incides with your round, which is why I try and get the first round not to appear cheap. If you are sharing wine bottles at a meal the heavier drinkers always seem quite pleased if I am having less as it leaves more for them.
 




Thunder Bolt

Silly old bat
For goodness sake get off your high horse. I've been down that road in helping. There's very little you can do to help an alcoholic. Unless THEY really want to give it up(few do) you are wasting your time.

I understand exactly where you're coming from. I had two people in my family who wouldn't admit they had a problem let alone want to stop. One did eventually, but with no help from me. The other one is dead now.
 


BensGrandad

New member
Jul 13, 2003
72,015
Haywards Heath
Having been a very heavy drinker when I ran a pub, bottle of Remy Martin VSOP a day, then having mouth cancer I now drink very little just the odd London Pride or Tanquery Gin and tonic at home but what gets me is the insistence of my younger family members on having shots which in the most are awful tasting anyway.
 


atfc village

Well-known member
Mar 28, 2013
5,080
Lower Bourne .Farnham
Had a mate die a couple of Weeks back from Alcholism cremated him Monday ,Found out funnily enough at a game from his best mate . He was warned about 10 Years ago after ending up in Hospital . He stayed off it for 3 Years ,then slowly would have a glass of Wine which would last him the evening . I saw him at a game about a Week before he died and he looked terrible . A total waste for a lad of 50 who came from a very good background ,Easy to say you have a choice but it's an addiction and sadly one he lost . RIP Tim.
 






spence

British and Proud
Oct 15, 2014
9,953
Crawley
Had a mate die a couple of Weeks back from Alcholism cremated him Monday ,Found out funnily enough at a game from his best mate . He was warned about 10 Years ago after ending up in Hospital . He stayed off it for 3 Years ,then slowly would have a glass of Wine which would last him the evening . I saw him at a game about a Week before he died and he looked terrible . A total waste for a lad of 50 who came from a very good background ,Easy to say you have a choice but it's an addiction and sadly one he lost . RIP Tim.

Absolutely. You are right in that it's an addiction along with drug taking,smoking/gambling etc. Every addiction can be beaten though and most of that comes down to the individual themselves.Of course support and guidance etc from others help. All this is pointless unless you are prepared to give up the addiction yourself. I know people who have gone in very expensive rehabs and legged it after a few days or started to drink as soon as his/her course was over. There are others who simply don't want to stop no matter what you say or help them with.
I gave up smoking after 25 years and have been clean for 4 years now because i wanted to quit. I simply had enough of it. When you get to that stage it really helps in any addiction.
 


NooBHA

Well-known member
Jan 13, 2015
8,591
Me and Mrs Giraffe rarely drink. We are not tea total but we just don't like the next day feeling of being hungover and the waste of time of recovering.

But when you go out with people these days it seems it is very hard not to drink much without being a party pooper. We still have fun. We just don't feel the need to get totally slaughtered. I find it hard to identify with people that drink so much. Are we alone?

And surely if you can't come home and not drink of an evening that makes you an alcoholic?

I am the total opposite.

I hate the taste of alcohol but I love the feeling of being drunk. I used to drink loads when younger but not so much now because I am plastered drunk on 3 or 4 pints and just can't keep up with friends around me when they drink but I repeat I do like the feeling of being drunk. I do agree that hangovers are not good.

I can be quite humorous when drunk but I also have a tendency to tell people what I think of them when drunk so totally avoid drinking with work colleagues, especially the ones I don' like too much and stick to going out with people I am friends with when partaking of alcohol.

So I agree with you and don't drink too often but being drunk, well I just cant agree on that one. It's a nice feeling
 




BLOCK F

Well-known member
Feb 26, 2009
6,723
As many others on here, I love a drink , but at 70 next year, my capacity is much reduced from my heyday.
Tend to drink wine and I love a good port, cognac and malt whisky. Used to love drinking pints of ale, but now 2 pints is my limit as it just makes me feel bad, although at the time I enjoy it.
Hate feeling rough the next day, so I tend towards moderation, without always succeeding, but then I do suffer.
 




The Merry Prankster

Pactum serva
Aug 19, 2006
5,578
Shoreham Beach
I hate being around alcoholics. Have no time for them.

For goodness sake get off your high horse. I've been down that road in helping. There's very little you can do to help an alcoholic. Unless THEY really want to give it up(few do) you are wasting your time.

I hate being around them as well (and I'm a recovering one) but I have endless time for them if , and you've hit the nail on the head, THEY want to. Otherwise you're correct, it's a waste of time.
 




Diablo

Well-known member
Sep 22, 2014
4,385
lewes
Realistically how much is too much ?...21 units is the recommended weekly max intake for men....So ten and a half pints....I have approx 12 pints(24units) and two bottles of wine(16 units) a week with at least two days alchohol free.
So whilst I am nearly double recommended intake don`t feel I`m anywhere near alchoholic !! am I ???
 


studio150

Well-known member
Jul 30, 2011
30,227
On the Border
Just image if everyone agreed to go tea total fir a home game and donate usual beer money to charity.
 




Wellesley

Well-known member
Jul 24, 2013
4,973
Which shows how much you know, diddly squat. You must have been such a help with so little empathy, sympathy and understanding.

Maybe he tried everything to help and it didn't work. I don't know, but maybe he has suffered extreme mental stress and anguish because of an alcoholic family member and is perfectly entitled to feel the way he does. You have no idea about his reasons and personal circumstances, so maybe you shouldn't jump to conclusions about whether he was caring or not. So yeah, get off your high horse.
 






spence

British and Proud
Oct 15, 2014
9,953
Crawley
I hate being around them as well (and I'm a recovering one) but I have endless time for them if , and you've hit the nail on the head, THEY want to. Otherwise you're correct, it's a waste of time.

Well done on your recovery. I know it's extremely difficult to recover from. Sometimes it's not worth even discussing it on a forum as some take the moral high ground and then throw insults at you.
I certainly have a lot of experience in this from having partners to finding my landlords body one Sunday morning. Plus many friends and associates . In a lot of cases you are banging your head against the wall.
 


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