I lost everthing tonight

[Lady Gull]

I have just text you Sean - feel free to text me whenever you want - xx

 

[GoldWithFalmer]

Just have to say. As a newbie to NSC I've found the support offered to Falkor throughout this thread pretty amazing.
Hats off to you all, and best wishes to Falkor. Hope everything works out.

oi you!! stick about,i already like you and don't worry when people get silly or binfest/rude.... just saying

 

[DarrenFreemansPerm]

Stay strong Falkor

 

[Muzzy]

Get the help mate, it's the only way forward for you. Your boys won't want you to be like this I'm sure of it. Get the help that is available to you and be the best dad that you can possibly be for them. You cannot do that as things are at present!

All families go through ups and downs and come through with just a few battlescars. That's just the way it is. Be strong and fight your demons for your boys sake that's all that matters for now. Good luck bud x

 

[Uncle Spielberg]

I'm laying in bed crying and praying the police knock on my mums door any time soon.

I can't accept what I know and heard tonight and to me in my life my this is one blow I can't take. I feel I need help I want help but If I ask for it a fear il never seey boys again. I'd rather be dead than have the fear of never seeing them again.

I been accused of lying about what I heard tonight, no one will believe me, and have all shot me away this is a constant battle I face with my sister my only blood relation no one believes she can do no wrong, yet she is being investigated by social, I stood ip against her tonight and lost my life, my family think I should have just accepted what I heard? Rather than questioning why she is telling people she has cancer.

My sister is my last connection to my birth and now she might aswell be dead.

You can talk to me mate. Anytime 24/7. You will get over this.

 

[Worthingite]

I'm laying in bed crying and praying the police knock on my mums door any time soon.

I can't accept what I know and heard tonight and to me in my life my this is one blow I can't take. I feel I need help I want help but If I ask for it a fear il never seey boys again. I'd rather be dead than have the fear of never seeing them again.

I been accused of lying about what I heard tonight, no one will believe me, and have all shot me away this is a constant battle I face with my sister my only blood relation no one believes she can do no wrong, yet she is being investigated by social, I stood ip against her tonight and lost my life, my family think I should have just accepted what I heard? Rather than questioning why she is telling people she has cancer.

My sister is my last connection to my birth and now she might aswell be dead.

Firstly, I am glad you are here. Second - We are ALL here for you, no matter what.

I don't know the full story of what is happening, but all I can say is get some rest, the people who love you and know you best will realise what this is doing to you. Please, stay strong for your little un's and please understand that they need you so much. Take some time out from your family, and as I say, rest up. You will find clarity comes with a clear head. If needs be (and this has helped me in the past), write a letter - either to someone imaginary, or to the people that are involved. Tell them your side of the story in this letter. You then have a choice - send that letter if you think it will help - or do what I did, and just keep it. You should find that writing it down will help you make sense of everything and come up with ideas on it.

I really hope it helps, I know I don't know you very well, but you seem like such a lovely guy. If you need ANYTHING - someone to talk to, a bit of time out, whatever, message me.

Please, Look after yourself mate.
Pete

 

[SK1NT]

I'm laying in bed crying and praying the police knock on my mums door any time soon.

I can't accept what I know and heard tonight and to me in my life my this is one blow I can't take. I feel I need help I want help but If I ask for it a fear il never seey boys again. I'd rather be dead than have the fear of never seeing them again.

I been accused of lying about what I heard tonight, no one will believe me, and have all shot me away this is a constant battle I face with my sister my only blood relation no one believes she can do no wrong, yet she is being investigated by social, I stood ip against her tonight and lost my life, my family think I should have just accepted what I heard? Rather than questioning why she is telling people she has cancer.

My sister is my last connection to my birth and now she might aswell be dead.

Mate i dont know the ins and outs but i DO know from on here that you are a decent bloke... Whatever has happened and is getting you down...NOTHING IS WORTH BEING DEAD FOR... it would be selfish on your little'uns mate...hang in there and be strong and things will get better... :hug:

 

[Falkor]

Can you clarify. Is your sister lying about having cancer? or can you not accept that she has cancer?

What ever the truth of this situation, you can deal with it, after reading your blog it shows that you can deal with shit!

She is lying, about cancer.

My family just won't accept it.

My dad don't believe I have mental health issues even though I been admitted to hospital a number of times. He won't let any of us question what where doing. To me he won't accept his parental needs, he takes good but not the bad.

I love people after my past a I have I love, issue for me is I get so angry at times as I fear for the ones I love.
Tonight my anger is on a different level my heart feels likes it's being danced on, I am broken. 26 years I feel like I'm 96 I can't do it I just can't.

 

[Greg Bobkin]

I'm laying in bed crying and praying the police knock on my mums door any time soon.

I can't accept what I know and heard tonight and to me in my life my this is one blow I can't take. I feel I need help I want help but If I ask for it a fear il never seey boys again. I'd rather be dead than have the fear of never seeing them again.

I been accused of lying about what I heard tonight, no one will believe me, and have all shot me away this is a constant battle I face with my sister my only blood relation no one believes she can do no wrong, yet she is being investigated by social, I stood ip against her tonight and lost my life, my family think I should have just accepted what I heard? Rather than questioning why she is telling people she has cancer.

My sister is my last connection to my birth and now she might aswell be dead.

Falkor, sounds like hell for you, but PLEASE take care and try and think positive. Never give up, it WILL get better.

The rest of NSC, you've done yourselves proud tonight. Take a bow son(s) (and daughters, esp. Lady Gull). Once again, when things go beyond petty arguments or debates about football or players, we've come together for the good of one of our own.

 

[turienzo's lovechild]

when i saw the opening post and the amount of pages i'll be honest i feared the worst....well done to all those involved

falkor- i've been in some pretty dark places and all i can say is that talking ALWAYS helps........you seem to have a lot of good friends on here so please talk to someone

 

[GoldWithFalmer]

My sister is my last connection to my birth and now she might aswell be dead.

?

Maybe,but things can change(leave the door ajar so to speak) but those boys? They are what you are here for and we all are here,some more,some a lot some very little,others none at all are here for YOU!!!!!!

 

[BBassic]

Mate, I'm awful with advice both following and giving but I'm sending good thoughts your way.

 

[martyn20]

She is lying, about cancer.

My family just won't accept it.

My dad don't believe I have mental health issues even though I been admitted to hospital a number of times. He won't let any of us question what where doing. To me he won't accept his parental needs, he takes good but not the bad.

I love people after my past a I have I love, issue for me is I get so angry at times as I fear for the ones I love.
Tonight my anger is on a different level my heart feels likes it's being danced on, I am broken. 26 years I feel like I'm 96 I can't do it I just can't.

Yes you can, you really can. I know it's tough and you can't find a solution in your head, I know it's all a jumble right now and that's why you know it's not the time to make any big decisions. There is a future even if its hard to find it right now, hang on mate.

 

[BadFish]

She is lying, about cancer.

My family just won't accept it.

My dad don't believe I have mental health issues even though I been admitted to hospital a number of times. He won't let any of us question what where doing. To me he won't accept his parental needs, he takes good but not the bad.

I love people after my past a I have I love, issue for me is I get so angry at times as I fear for the ones I love.
Tonight my anger is on a different level my heart feels likes it's being danced on, I am broken. 26 years I feel like I'm 96 I can't do it I just can't.

You can do mate, You can fight on, you can deal with this situation, but it will take time and maybe a little help. Please accept some help from your friends on here or talk to a stranger, the Samaritans we are all just a PM or phonecall away!

 

[pipkin112]

I'm laying in bed crying and praying the police knock on my mums door any time soon.

I can't accept what I know and heard tonight and to me in my life my this is one blow I can't take. I feel I need help I want help but If I ask for it a fear il never seey boys again. I'd rather be dead than have the fear of never seeing them again.

I been accused of lying about what I heard tonight, no one will believe me, and have all shot me away this is a constant battle I face with my sister my only blood relation no one believes she can do no wrong, yet she is being investigated by social, I stood ip against her tonight and lost my life, my family think I should have just accepted what I heard? Rather than questioning why she is telling people she has cancer.

My sister is my last connection to my birth and now she might aswell be dead.

I don't know you fella, but there are people that you do have a connection with on NSC, so get in touch with them, and have a private chat with them about your problems.

 

[oldalbiongirl]

Yes you are 26. Not 96. You have a lot of years to sort all of this stuff out in your head. You can get there and remember you have little ones who will always look up to you. No matter what others think. You clearly love them so think about them before deciding you cant carry on. Yes you can and thinking of them will inspire you and give you the strength to carry on. Think of their futures, what you want for them, what you want them to become. Stay strong and be there to see it. Thinking of you.

 

[BadFish]

This can be fixed!

 

[StonehamPark]

Tonight my anger is on a different level my heart feels likes it's being danced on, I am broken. 26 years I feel like I'm 96 I can't do it I just can't.

Sean, we don't personally know each other outside of NSC and I really hope that you can see all of the positivity from so many people on here tonight.
There's always someone to talk to, even if it's just on NSC with people you don't know too well.
Remember your kids will be yours forever, nothing will change that.
Also, things could be worse. You could have been born a Palace fan!

Send me a PM if you want to chat buddy, I'm around all night.

 

[Marxo]

Can only add my best wishes, keep your head up mate.

 

[Muzzy]

I'll put something to you a little bluntly mate but don't take this the wrong way.

Your kids have a right to a father, you don't have the right to take that right away from them.

Try and forget about your sister for a while and think about the little ones. Their love for you is unconditional. Don't ever forget that.

Man hugs for you pal.