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How do you say no to Brighton beggars?









papajaff

Well-known member
Aug 7, 2005
4,028
Brighton
This is interesting. After a conversation with them, do you then give them money?

What I'm saying is, sometimes I give them money. Can't do that all the time but they do appreciate being acknowledged. I can't just ignore them, they may have ended up like that through bad luck.

Saying hello is good manners and costs nothing. If they tell me to **** off, wouldn't bother me. But no-one ever has.
 


Paris

Well-known member
Jul 17, 2010
4,127
13th district
I say the classic "Sorry mate. I don't have any change"
Sometimes I do give change but not all the time.

Or when I leave a club absolutely wankered after failing to pull, "no **** off I don't have any ****ing change".

Shortly followed by "Sorry for being rude back then. If you don't mind me asking...how much for a BJ? Oh and can you drive me home as well? I'll be using my taxi money"
 


Creaky

Well-known member
Mar 26, 2013
3,862
Hookwood - Nr Horley
I'll no doubt be accused of contributing to the problem but I very rarely say, "no", especially when asked politely.

The price of a cuppa isn't going to break me and, 'there but for the grace of God'.
 




Triggaaar

Well-known member
Oct 24, 2005
53,187
Goldstone
Absolutely and your explanation is a clear and good one
Thank you.
although I'm still not convinced I agree with it.
No problem.
If I say sorry I want to be genuine.
I understand that. I say it because it's a polite way of saying no, and I can empathise with their plight, even if I'm not extremely sorry.

And I'm not sorry not to give them money (because I feel it won't help them)
Well maybe you're a bit sorry that you can't help them.

And i think people are saying sorry for not giving them money, they're not saying sorry for the situation the homeless person has found themselves in?
My guess is that it's mostly just because it's a polite way of saying no.

And it was a put down, you appear to want to feel superior.
:lol: I read and post on NSC for a mixture of keeping up with Brighton stuff, and entertainment. Over-reacting, posting with outrage and generally taking the mick entertains me, that's all :) Selfish, sure, but I'm here for my own entertainment, no one else's. This isn't a public service. As for my superiority, that's just inbuilt. You'd be the same if you were as great as me.

Edit - I heard three other people tonight say No thanks btw!
It's weird though, right?
 


herecomesaregular

We're in the pipe, 5 by 5
Oct 27, 2008
4,654
Still in Brighton
What I'm saying is, sometimes I give them money. Can't do that all the time but they do appreciate being acknowledged. I can't just ignore them, they may have ended up like that through bad luck.

Saying hello is good manners and costs nothing. If they tell me to **** off, wouldn't bother me. But no-one ever has.

Fair enough, although after both acknowledging them and having a conversation, personally, I think it would be hard then just to walk away without giving money. There by the grace of god though and walk a mile in my shoes etc. Might well try that though, thanks for the insight.
 










Commander

Arrogant Prat
NSC Patron
Apr 28, 2004
13,562
London
Jeez - how unlucky can one family be?

Indeed.

Saw the same guy a few weeks later being chased down the street with a bottle of vodka in his hand by a Tesco's security guard. Just one thing after another for the poor chap.
 




herecomesaregular

We're in the pipe, 5 by 5
Oct 27, 2008
4,654
Still in Brighton
Thank you.
No problem.
I understand that. I say it because it's a polite way of saying no, and I can empathise with their plight, even if I'm not extremely sorry.

Well maybe you're a bit sorry that you can't help them.

My guess is that it's mostly just because it's a polite way of saying no.

:lol: I read and post on NSC for a mixture of keeping up with Brighton stuff, and entertainment. Over-reacting, posting with outrage and generally taking the mick entertains me, that's all :) Selfish, sure, but I'm here for my own entertainment, no one else's. This isn't a public service. As for my superiority, that's just inbuilt. You'd be the same if you were as great as me.

It's weird though, right?

No worries, NSC and all it's members is a superb forum imo. I am very rarely offended by anything on it, and often laughing out loud, occasionally frustrated though by the ripping into posts often quickly inputted, especially when on phones with too much autocorrect haha.

I'm open to changing my opinion (it really annoys me when people are of blinkered, fixed opinion) - without debate and criticism it is hard to stay open minded in this stupid, modern world.
 


Cheshire Cat

The most curious thing..
Shake my head and walk on.

In central Liverpool the vagrants are all completely zonked and unconscious at 9.00 am, presumably on Spice or some-such (the pavement can't be that comfortable and quiet in the rush hour). Except for the Roumanian (probably) Big Issue sellers who seem to be permanently pregnant and are well organised. By 5.30pm the vagrants seem a little more awake.

Hanover Street, Church Street and Lord Street are particularly popular venues, and the city centre is beginning to smell of wee.

There has also been a recent surge in pop-up tents in doorways - which are marginally less disgusting than the soiled quilts.
 






Triggaaar

Well-known member
Oct 24, 2005
53,187
Goldstone
No worries, NSC and all it's members is a superb forum imo.
You're welcome :D
I am very rarely offended by anything on it, and often laughing out loud
Likewise. I can only think of one time I've really been offended :mad:
occasionally frustrated though by the ripping into posts often quickly inputted, especially when on phones with too much autocorrect haha.
They can be funny though. I like how stupid such criticisms are.

I'm open to changing my opinion (it really annoys me when people are of blinkered, fixed opinion) - without debate and criticism it is hard to stay open minded in this stupid, modern world.
Likewise (not that others would notice).
 


el punal

Well-known member
Aug 29, 2012
12,550
The dull part of the south coast
I just completely and utterly ignore them. May seem hard hearted, but I follow the advice of the homeless charities - which is don't give them money. They'll spend it on the very things that got them there in the first place - drink or drugs. I also wonder if some/most are professional beggars who piss off home at the end of the day thinking "You mugs - ta very much."

My other point is that we live in one of the most affluent countries in the world, and in comparison to many others no one is wanting in the basic requirements to live i.e. food and shelter. So excuse me if I show no pity, and yes, I accept that many have had an awful time in their lives and for that they have my sympathy. Unfortunately the begging side of it cuts no ice with me. I will donate money to the homeless charities, I might even offer to give a "beggar" a cup of tea, but give money to someone demanding it with some sickly sob story to feed their habit - no chance.
 


Nixonator

Well-known member
Feb 8, 2016
6,737
Shoreham Beach
Will buy or offer to buy them food or a coffee if I see them on the way to lunch.

Many of them decline the offer, some the cheek of asking for the change instead.
 


BNthree

Plastic JCL
Sep 14, 2016
11,457
WeHo
Usually just say something noncommittal like "nope, not today" and stroll on.
 






Cloughie

New member
Jun 7, 2009
426
It's definitely got worse. I used to live in Brighton about 13 years ago and only started working in the city again recently, and it was one of the first things I noticed. I always feel bad saying no, but judging by the amount of northern accents it always seems to me like a lot of them come to Brighton because it's a good place to beg. That's probably a simplistic view, but I bet there aren't loads of beggars in Newcastle with southern accents.

When I lived in London a guy came up to me just before Christmas one year, in tears, and said he'd just heard that his kid had been rushed to hospital and that he didn't have the cash for the taxi fare and was there any way I could help him out. He was so clearly genuine, and so clearly distressed, that I gave him a tenner. He was so grateful and touched and I went on my way feeling very happy that I'd done a good deed at the time of year for giving, and all that.

About 6 months later the same guy approached in the same place with the same story.

Think that's the last time I gave cash to a beggar.


Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk

I volunteered at a charity combating homelessness whilst at university. It amazed me that they asked people not to give anyone money, but to direct them to facilities where they could receive proper help with accommodation, food, cleanliness, education etc. On reading the story quoted, unfortunately it rings true from many, many of the things I experienced myself over the 12 months I worked there.

It goes without saying that there are plenty of geniune cases, but these people tend not to beg for cash to survive. They have their own ways of staying warm, getting food etc without disturbing the general populace. As sad as it sounds, you probably don't notice many of these people as they're off doing their own daily rituals when you're off working, taking your kids to school and so on.

On more than one occasion I stayed overnight at their emergency housing facility, which housed 12 people overnight on a first come, first served basis. In order to stay there you had to be at the residence before 9 o'clock, not intoxicated (with drink or drugs) and abide by the rules etc. If, on some occasions the beds weren't all filled we used to go out into town to see if we could find any people on the streets who could do with a meal, hot shower, warm bed etc. I was astounded at some of the abuse we received from the very people we were trying to help. Obviously this wasn't the textbook response, but I'd wager it was about 50% of the people we approached refused help on the basis that they couldn't do drugs or get hammered.
 


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