defrocked priest
Father Footy
I never had one in my life but now suspect I may have a bum grape.
What should I do?
What should I do?
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Hemorriods
- Thread starter defrocked priest
- Start date
Billy the Fish
Technocrat
Get some cream. I recommend germoloids, Preparation H made it worse for me, you also get good instructions, explanation of the condition and some dos and don'ts. I've had a couple of bad cases of the farmers, you know it's got bad when you take a dump and it looks like someones been murdered in your toilet, I should've gone to the doctor really, I knew he'd want to finger me though so that pretty much ruled it out.
defrocked priest
Father Footy
- Thread starter
- #4
cheers Billy.
to be honest I'm getting worried as there's no blood just the discomfort.I'm kicking myself for not ever having a colon scan.Now I'm wrestling with going to the doctor and getting fingered or physician heal thyself and giving the Germoliod a whirls.
to be honest I'm getting worried as there's no blood just the discomfort.I'm kicking myself for not ever having a colon scan.Now I'm wrestling with going to the doctor and getting fingered or physician heal thyself and giving the Germoliod a whirls.
mcshane in the 79th
New member
- Nov 4, 2005
- 10,485
Eat lots of brown bread and All-Bran - worked really well for me, makes your poo nice and soft and regular 
Billy the Fish
Technocrat
It is quite worrying isn't, I'm definately going to bite the bullet and get it checked out properly at some point. I'm quite careful with it these days, any hint of an itch and I use the cream so I tend not to get any inflammation, just the odd bit of blood on the toilet paper if I've been out on the piss alot. I wouldn't worry too much, the cream will probably settle it down but if you think it'll give you some peace of mind then the doctors can't be a bad thing, like I say I'm going to go one day.
clippedgull
Hotdogs, extra onions
They had this disease on 'embarrassing illnesses' channel 4 just the other day.
we got a good look at the womens back passage just as I was eating my aberdeen angus sausage sandwich
we got a good look at the womens back passage just as I was eating my aberdeen angus sausage sandwich
Sigull
'Arte et Marte'
From someone who ran the full course.....Tried every possible means of pain relief over several years, was so desperate I even tried to pop them with a pin!
. Finally had the dreaded op. (haemorroidectomy) Spelling?The pain after the op is excruciating,
and you cant leave until you poo (Through raw flesh)! But, it is defo worth it 8 years now in complete comfort,Nemesis
SERIOUSLY!
From someone who ran the full course.....Tried every possible means of pain relief over several years, was so desperate I even tried to pop them with a pin!
The pain after the op is excruciating,
Somebody I worked with years ago had the same op-he was told by the nurses that his first dump would be more painful than shitting a bowling ball. He held on for as long as possible (a couple of days because he was bricking it). He finally sat on the crapper, ready for hellish pain and there was none. The nurses were just being evil bitches
dougdeep
New member
Tom Hark Preston Park
Will Post For Cash
- Jul 6, 2003
- 72,359
Learn to spell?
Not a person on the planet who can spell THAT word without looking it up. Fact.
supaseagull
Well-known member
go to your quack and get some proctofoam.
defrocked priest
Father Footy
- Thread starter
- #13
...Learn to spell?
well then what is it?
Hemriods or Hemorrhoids.
Common doug you mean to tell me in all your time driving a lorry,you never had bum sore
?defrocked priest
Father Footy
- Thread starter
- #14
They had this disease on 'embarrassing illnesses' channel 4 just the other day.
we got a good look at the womens back passage just as I was eating my aberdeen angus sausage sandwich
dougdeep
New member
...
well then what is it?
Hemriods or Hemorrhoids.
Common doug you mean to tell me in all your time driving a lorry,you never had bum sore
My bum is nice and shapely thank you. Haemorrhoid, from the Greek,
defrocked priest
Father Footy
- Thread starter
- #16
kin ell off buy one letter...
i had mine removed in hospitol and 3 weeks later i was diagnosed with cancer so leaving it doesn't help i left mine for 12 years and they never bled but by christ they where painful and i was to embarrased to show them to the docter but i was glad i did in the end
defrocked priest
Father Footy
- Thread starter
- #18
glad to hear your on the up & up.
yeh this is indeed a wake up call, thats going to feck me sleep, dreams of colon cancer.