There's a massive elephant in the room, in that, we've all seen her fanny. Surely someone cleverer and wittier than I (that's all of you) can come up with a minge pun?
OT
I played football against a guy who had an arm amputated from the elbow down. When the ball struck the upper half of the amptated one, our right back shouted "Stump ball Ref!!"