[Albion] Getting an albion joke into a grooms speech

[Bry Nylon]

"I call my wife's legs Dunk and Duffy, because (insert punchline)..."?

...they'll be balls bouncing off them all night long?

 

[Simontheseagull]

Tell her there are three loves in your life and she comes a very close second and she’s lucky

 

[East Staffs Gull]

You could say that the run up to the wedding has been very stressful, until Palace beat Cardiff.

 

[tedebear]

She's forbidden anything to do with the Albion? Are you sure you want to marry her?

This is the same question I'm asking?

 

[Seasidesage]

You stand up, you look lovingly into your misses eyes, you raise your glass...

"OLE OLE OLE OLE, BRUNO, BRUNO!"

Winner winner Chicken dinner!

 

[Paulie Gualtieri]

“An Englishman walks into his third premier league season.....”


Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk

 

[Coldeanseagull]

Just remember. A thirty second laugh at the reception at her expense will stay with you FOREVER!
Women DO NOT FORGET!
Just sayin'

 

[Barham's tash]

"I call my wife's legs Dunk and Duffy, because (insert punchline)..."?

....”because now we’re married i expect them to shut up shop and stop all the fun in the final third.”

 

[Jack Straw]

"I call my wife's legs Dunk and Duffy, because (insert punchline)..."?

...they're never more than five yards apart.

 

[bWize]

When I got married nearly 40 years ago, my best man painted a horrible but perhaps realistic picture of my demeanour when the Albion weren't doing well and went on to say that my wife had better realise that she was marrying me for better, for worse, and even if the Albion lose. ( And on that day we actually went down 4-1 at Liverpool...)

Honeymoon go well?

 

[Eeyore]

There is probably a going down / not going down reference somewhere, but it might depend on the audience etc...

Or staying up....

 

[hart's shirt]

Choose Frankie Valli's 'Can't Take My Eyes Off You' as your first dance together.

She'll be impressed.

And when it comes to the chorus, she'll never know about your secret love...

 

[Durlston]

"I can promise my new wife there'll be no problems staying up although it'll be very hard for her at times". "As for our love life......" *take out some viagra from your pocket*

 

[marlowe]

You could always lull your wife into a false sense of security and let her believe she got her way... that is until the ultimate moment of your wedding day when you come to consumate your marriage. Let her rip your clothes off you with wild abandon but make sure she leaves your trousers till last. When she seductively removes them she'll discover you're wearing an Albion themed thong

 

[Postman Pat]

How about a bit of poetry:

I love you more than football
I can’t tell a lie
Before I ever met you
I was Brighton till I die

I thought that the Albion
Would always take first place
But that all changed on the day
I first saw your face

I love you more than Tony Bloom
The Amex and BRUUUUNNNOOOO
I love you more than Murray
I want you to know

I love you more than football
And I will for ever more
But for now I need to ask
Anyone know the footy score?

 

[Gritt23]

My nephew managed it, when he got married back in 2017. Delivered it very well actually. Went something like .....

"So, here we are, what a magnificent day. It's not been a straightforward journey to get to this point, and I know many people here probably never thought this day would ever actually arrive. But here we are, playing Man City today, Brighton ARE in the Premier League! What were the chances that it would eventually happen on the same day as my wedding. Sorry about that, I've never been great with planning."

Went down a storm in Cornwall, or at least it did with half of the Wedding guests.