desprateseagull
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furday fun - why did the farmer cross the road..?
- Thread starter desprateseagull
- Start date
turienzo's lovechild
New member
- Oct 25, 2003
- 23,964
horse walks into a pub
"why the long face?" asks the barman
"i've got aids" says the horse
"why the long face?" asks the barman
"i've got aids" says the horse
Hercules Rockerfeller
New member
I went to the zoo the other day and the only animal they had was a little dog.
It was a shitzu
It was a shitzu
whats brown and sticky
a stick
a stick
TSB
Captain Hindsight
Hercules Rockerfeller said:
Oldy, but a classic
Lord Bracknell
On fire
I prefer this version ...Temporary Slim Bars said:Oldy, but a classic
What's a shitzu?
One with no penguins.
Tom Hark Preston Park
Will Post For Cash
- Jul 6, 2003
- 72,358
What's Good King Wenceslas' favourite pizza?
Deep pan, crisp and even
Deep pan, crisp and even
1
1066gull
Guest
ahahahahahahhaahahaturienzo's lovechild said:
hahahaha
you're so f***ing hilarious mate!
surrey jim
Not in Surrey
the south park aristocrats joke not safe for work, young kids, people easily offended
Hercules Rockerfeller
New member
surrey jim said:
That is effing funny!
The Timekeeper
FAT BOY 'NOT' SLIM
wot do you call a one eyed dinosaur...... doyoufinkhesawus
wot do you call a one eyed dinosaurs dog...... doyoufinkhesawus rex
wot do you call a gay dinosaur.... bloodysawarse
wot do you call a one eyed dinosaurs dog...... doyoufinkhesawus rex
wot do you call a gay dinosaur.... bloodysawarse
Johnny Crumplin Football
New member
How do you know there is an elephant sleeping in your bed?
It's got the letter E on it's pyjama pocket
It's got the letter E on it's pyjama pocket
Who invented fractions?
Henry the 1/8!
Henry the 1/8!
Stinkers Bridge
New member
How do you get an elephant out of a tree?
Get him to sit on a leaf and wait till autumn.
Get him to sit on a leaf and wait till autumn.
Trufflehound
Re-enfranchised
An old woman is getting very lonely and wants to get married one more time before she dies. So she places an ad in the lonely hearts column:
"Woman seeking man. Must be similar age (75). Must never run away. Must never hit me. Must be good in bed. Apply in person."
Two days later there's a ring on the bell. The woman opens the front door to see an old man sitting in a wheelchair. He has no arms and no legs.
"I've come about the advert," he says.
"But how could you expect me to fall for you?" asks the woman. "Look at you. You've got no legs."
"That means I can never run away," he answers.
"But, but... you've got no arms either," says the old woman in horror.
"That means I can never hit you," says the man.
The woman thinks about this for a second and says: "But you're in a wheelchair. How could you be good in bed?"
The old man winks at her and says: "I rang the doorbell didn't I?"
"Woman seeking man. Must be similar age (75). Must never run away. Must never hit me. Must be good in bed. Apply in person."
Two days later there's a ring on the bell. The woman opens the front door to see an old man sitting in a wheelchair. He has no arms and no legs.
"I've come about the advert," he says.
"But how could you expect me to fall for you?" asks the woman. "Look at you. You've got no legs."
"That means I can never run away," he answers.
"But, but... you've got no arms either," says the old woman in horror.
"That means I can never hit you," says the man.
The woman thinks about this for a second and says: "But you're in a wheelchair. How could you be good in bed?"
The old man winks at her and says: "I rang the doorbell didn't I?"
Buffalo Seagull
Active member
Why did the chicken cross the road?
To get to the other side.
Why did the pervert cross the road?
Because his dick was stuck in the chicken
To get to the other side.
Why did the pervert cross the road?
Because his dick was stuck in the chicken