Etiquette question

[Gwylan]

I was in Japan a few weeks ago and forgot to tell my bank. When I tried to get money out at Tokyo airport, my account was blocked, and I couldn't get any cash for the train into town. Fortunately, I'd been sitting next to someone going to the same hotel and he paid my £3 fare for me. I looked to pay him back (once I'd told the bank where I was) but I didn't see him again.

We've just hooked up on social media and I'm debating what to do: should I offer to pay the money back? Offer to give to charity? Forget about it? It's such a low amount, would he feel insulted if I mention it?

I'll be guided by the wisdom of NSC?

 

[skipper734]

Send him a small gift as a thank you.

 

[el punal]

Send him some of the money-off vouchers for the club shop. Convert him into an Albion fan, invite him to the next available home match, buy him a beer and then have a party. Win, win, all round!

 

[Goldstone1976]

Offer to pay it back. Any mild shock he feels (if any) at your offer should be outweighed by pleasure that he's met an honourable person who remembers his debts. If he declines, accept the gift with good grace.

In addition - do as @el punal suggests!

 

[Herr Tubthumper]

Asking for his home address and or bank details to send a repayment or gift might feel a little uncomfortable. I'd send a brief message to offer to repay but also give the donation to charity option. This puts the ball in his court if he wants to offer up his personal details.

 

[Nibble]

Offer a quick hand job. Any awkwardness about the cash should pale into insignificance.

 

[drew]

Surely it's obvious that you need to offer and ask him whether he wants the money sent or transferred online. If he is the sort of person who will lend a stranger money then it's likely his response will be to say something along the lines of 'thanks for the offer but don't worry'. You can then make a contribution of, say, £10 to a charity and let him know you did it because of his generosity.

 

[drew]

Offer a quick hand job. Any awkwardness about the cash should pale into insignificance.

You can do that on social media?

 

[Gwylan]

Surely it's obvious that you need to offer and ask him whether he wants the money sent or transferred online. If he is the sort of person who will lend a stranger money then it's likely his response will be to say something along the lines of 'thanks for the offer but don't worry'. You can then make a contribution of, say, £10 to a charity and let him know you did it because of his generosity.

That's what I was going to do before I asked people. I was just concerned that he might feel insulted. I do like the idea of sending a small gift but I'd have to send it to his home address which means asking for it or looking it up (I'm certain I could find it, he's a Pole so he's not got a common name and I know what town he lives in - but it would make me look like a stalker)

 

[severnside gull]

Offer to pay it back. Any mild shock he feels (if any) at your offer should be outweighed by pleasure that he's met an honourable person who remembers his debts. If he declines, accept the gift with good grace.

In addition - do as @el punal suggests!

I'd go with that and if he says no pop £3 in a charity box and let him know

 

[Igzilla]

Maybe in the charity offer, ask him if he has any personal preference?

 

[Peteinblack]

Offer a quick hand job. Any awkwardness about the cash should pale into insignificance.

I do love a story with a happy ending

 

[Gwylan]

Maybe in the charity offer, ask him if he has any personal preference?

I thought of that but what if it's something I didn't like. He could be a rabid Catholic and want money given to a religious charity.

Or to the Crystal Palace youth development fund.

 

[JBenno]

I thought of that but what if it's something I didn't like. He could be a rabid Catholic and want money given to a religious charity.

Or to the Crystal Palace youth development fund.

If that turns out to be the case then just pay back the debt at 1p for every £1.....

 

[Barham's tash]

Who do you bank with? Most have the MPay function now so you can text him the money. Specifically designed for low value transactions.

 

[The Antikythera Mechanism]

Just offer sincere thanks that he was kind enough to help out when you were in a fix. It's all about respect in Japan

 

[Gwylan]

Thanks for all your advice (well, except Nibble ) You may be interested to know that he told me to forget it but give to charity if I wished

 

[Wellesley]

Easy, just blank him and you're three quid up.





Edit: **** it, too late.

 

[Shropshire Seagull]

Maybe too late now but I've paid someone I owed a small amount to via PayPal ....

 

[Prince Monolulu]

Buy him 3 tracks off of the new Adele album.