[Humour] Entertaining Conspiracy Theories

[Van Cleef]

The mind controlling chip that Astra Zeneca injected into my bloodstream at my first covid jab has suggested I start this thread.


*apologies if I'm repeating past threads.

Sorry, should have added "patently untrue conspiracy theories. For entertainment purposes only"

 

[The Clamp]

Ugh.

 

[The Clamp]

Hmm. June 17 start join date.

When did that “Swedish” nut job get banned?

Anyway, this will likely be him.

 

[RandyWanger]

The mind controlling chip that Astra Zeneca injected into my bloodstream at my first covid jab has suggested I start this thread.


*apologies if I'm repeating past threads.

You're lucky you only got the chip version, not the one that caused death. It didn't stop covid though did it

 

[Harry Wilson's tackle]

Hmm. June 17 start join date.

When did that “Swedish” nut job get banned?

Anyway, this will likely be him.

No, the OP is sound.

 

[Harry Wilson's tackle]

OK. I was told that there is an underground submarine harbour in Shoreham (sort of under Shoreham harbour) with passageways to St Nicholas' Church and Easthill House in Portslade. This conspiracy has always intrigued me.

Mind you I was told this by a lad called Antony who also told me that his dad had 'titted-off' the queen.

We were six at the time (1964).

 

[Whitechapel]

Hmm. June 17 start join date.

When did that “Swedish” nut job get banned?

Anyway, this will likely be him.

March. Not quite seeing the link there, but it fits the thread quite nicely I guess

 

[Greg Bobkin]

Hmm. June 17 start join date.

When did that “Swedish” nut job get banned?

Anyway, this will likely be him.

I'm sure a mod can correct me, but I'm not sure the pizza-box-botherer has actually been banned from NSCo. Pretty sure his profile (I saw it when looking at another thread) said he was online within the past week or so.

Edit: here we go. Screenshot taken just now. Maybe that's a conspiracy theory on its own!

 

[Van Cleef]

Hmm. June 17 start join date.

When did that “Swedish” nut job get banned?

Anyway, this

Sorry. I have added another line to the OP to make it a bit clearer. It's not an attempt to stir things.


And I don't like pizza either

 

[METALMICKY]

My favourite one. They have a cure for the common cold but are never going to make it available! Of course they will say there are too many variants. The reality is that for the pharmaceutical companies etc it would be a financial disaster. Just look at what is spent on the huge range of cold remedies.

Not particularly entertaining but plausible?

 

[Bakero]

Sorry. I have added another line to the OP to make it a bit clearer. It's not an attempt to stir things.


And I don't like pizza either

Who doesn't like pizza? That's like saying you don't like sandwiches.

Anyway, two conspiracy theories to add:

1. Birds aren't real.
2. Van Cleef is an android.

 

[Sid and the Sharknados]

Hmm. June 17 start join date.

When did that “Swedish” nut job get banned?

Anyway, this will likely be him.

Is there any basis to the idea that he wasn't actually Swedish, or is that itself a conspiracy theory?

 

[Bakero]

My favourite one. They have a cure for the common cold but are never going to make it available! Of course they will say there are too many variants. The reality is that for the pharmaceutical companies etc it would be a financial disaster. Just look at what is spent on the huge range of cold remedies.

Not particularly entertaining but plausible?

I also think they're suppressing the hangover cure to stave off the irreparable liver damage it'd inevitably lead to.

 

[Gonzo BHA]

Plenty of fodder to choose from but my favourite has to be Australia is a made up place and Australians are all actors.

 

[Mellotron]

You know, a number of years ago conspiracy theories did used to feel more fun, more exotic, but most importantly, more harmless.

It feels like since the internet really came of age, certain groups of people have realised they can weaponise and monetise CTs for profit. So they’re not fun anymore.

They’re now dangerous in the hands of spectacularly thick people.

 

[Mellotron]

Plenty of fodder to choose from but my favourite has to be Australia is a made up place and Australians are all actors.

The upside down in MADE UP show Stranger Things was a clear nod WAKE UP SHEEP

 

[Happy Exile]

Not sure if it's a conspiracy theory but the legends of the Holy Grail being still hidden in Lewes and protected by a handful of people "in the know" are entertaining. The evidence is apparently: a Knights Templar church from the time of the Crusades being associated with the Grail being brought to the town, then when Thomas a Beckett was murdered the knights fled to the Bishop of Malling's house (the Lewes Malling, not the Kent one) and put their swords on a table, which threw them off because the Grail was on the table and rejected the murderer's weapons (the reputed table is in Anne of Cleves' house in the town). Supposedly it then ended up in the care of the priory, where it was hidden by the monks at the time of the dissolution of the monasteries, and a spring (Pinwell possibly?) that had always flowed clear started flowing red. It's said to be still there, or in the Masonic lodge, buried under the Town Hall and probably elsewhere too

 

[Goldstone1976]

I'm sure a mod can correct me, but I'm not sure the pizza-box-botherer has actually been banned from NSCo. Pretty sure his profile (I saw it when looking at another thread) said he was online within the past week or so.

Edit: here we go. Screenshot taken just now. Maybe that's a conspiracy theory on its own!

View attachment 163218

Defo banned. Can only assume that ‘last seen’ captures the last time that account logged in. But he can’t post. Under that account.

 

[Lenny Rider]

Plenty of fodder to choose from but my favourite has to be Australia is a made up place and Australians are all actors.

Not true, although it was a bloody long way, I've been there.

I wouldn't say favourite, but the one that sticks in my mind is Princess Di being murdered because she was pregnant with Dodi Fayed's child and the establishment couldn't have the future King, ie William, having a half sibling who was a Muslim.

Whether she was murdered is still open to conjecture, but I know of the person or persons who embalmed her on her arrival in his country and she wasn't pregnant.

 

[Gonzo BHA]

https://www.independent.co.uk/news/...eptance-of-pseudoprofound-bulls-a6757731.html

There's something deliciously ironic about a person who has watched a couple of YouTube videos telling others to "do your research!"