Does this make me a bad person?

[Digweeds Trousers]

I used to think I could make a difference. I used to think I could help. I can't though. Not really.

I give money to charity, to Africa but still people are dying. I give to childline and still children are abused.

I think all the right things, I'm a moral person, and I do care, but just not enough.

I leave work in the evening and head for the station. The weight of the world is on my shoulders. Commission hasn't been paid, pissed too much away at Christmas, and have'nt been to the gym.

Lightng up my fag, I step over a person slumped against a wall, wrapped in an old coat, balaclava covering his face. Shivering. I think its so wrong the governement do so little to help the homeless.

The fiver I drop helps him to his next fix. what's the point? I should pick him up and take him home, feed him, give him a bath, a bed for the night.

But I wont. Ever. I get home and turn on the TV. the news is on. People are dying across the world. I do care, but just not enough. Crack open a can from the fridge, and run a hot bath.

No clean water and lack of food is killing thousands of people a day.........................and I ease myself into the bath. Lovely. It feels good. I feel good and thats important.

Lying back on the couch, full of curry, naan bread and beer the late news comes on. Quick. Turn that off, its just so depressing in the world. I have done my bit. I gave money. Why should I pack up my job and go build a school in africa. I do care............just not enough.

I talk the talk, i say the right things. Poor bastards, poor sods. Look at that, it's terrible. God help them. whose God? Mine? Theirs? Anyones?

I give a bit more cash. A Screwed up tenner in a bucket in the pub, a fiver to the old bird from the Sally Ann. There you go love, keep up the good work. would I help her take the bucket round town on a Friday night? f*** off! It's the weekend and I'm out with mates spending more on one round than would feed someone for a month.

I feel bad. I would do more, I do care...............just not enough. If opinions saved the the world you'd call me Mother f***ing Theresa. But it's action we need. And I'm so busy. I would help. I really would. But it will put me out. It'll mean I'll have to get off my indolent fat arse and do something. And I won't.

But when it's too late, and my cosy flabby world is rocked to the core. You'll see me out there in the rain. Screaming for help, crying out for someone to hear me. I know people do care...........just not enough.

 

[Barnet Seagull]

no

 

[Easy 10]

And then Scotland go and lose to Morocco.

 

[Brighton Breezy]

Is that an extract from a book or something?

 

[Digweeds Trousers]

No Richie, it's just how I felt last night whinging in the pub about all the problems in my life and then watching the news. I am the first one to get on my high horse and tell people the rights and wrongs of this world. what have I done about it? f*** all. Absolutely nothing in the great scheme of things. And it makes me feel utterly inadequate. Utterly useless.

 

[Lokki 7]

That's why they invented beer

 

[Brighton Breezy]

No Richie, it's just how I felt last night whinging in the pub about all the problems in my life and then watching the news. I am the first one to get on my high horse and tell people the rights and wrongs of this world. what have I done about it? f*** all. Absolutely nothing in the great scheme of things. And it makes me feel utterly inadequate. Utterly useless.

Dont beat yourself up.

I am sure you do lots for your family and friends just by being yourself.

Giving some money etc is more then a lot of people do as well.

 

[John Dorian]

no mate, you give your money (quite a lot by the sounds of things) and thats enough i think ... no-one is expected to turn all the worlds problems around by themselves. so ,loong as you give the occasional fiver to the homeless guy on the street then i feel your doing your bit !!

 

[Biscuit]

You got issues. Go and see a shrink you nutcase.

 

[Digweeds Trousers]

Cheer Biscuit.

 

[Parson Henry]

Diggers you summed my thoughts up so well.

 

[Biscuit]

Glad I could help.

Your not a bad person, you help people out.. thats good. You'd only be a bad person if you went out of your way to hinder someone do a good thing.. does that make sence?

 

[Easy 10]

If you spend your life worrying about every other poor sod who's less fortunate, you'll lead no life at all. Lose the guilt - its not your fault, and its not your responsibilty. Do what you can within reason, which is what you ARE doing, and your concience should be clear.

Its YOUR life to live how YOU choose - you have no moral responsibilities or obligations towards anyone else in this world other than your loved ones.

Thats my way.

 

[sleepynick]

No, but if the weight of all this is on your shoulders than maybe you should try to see if yoou can do more than just offer money. Maybe look to volunteer for your local oxfam shop or homeless centre etc. Even if its once in a blue moon.

Sure - one person's actions can't solve all the world's problems, but one day of action is worth more than a lifetime of thought.

 

[RickofBHAFC]

Bloody hell mate - that's 20 notes you gave away in those few paragraphs! That's a damn site more than a lot of others do - chill mate, don't have a cow!

 

[Chesney Christ]

I can sympathise with how DT feels - its so difficult to not feel guilty about how little we all do.

The point is that we, as society, can help a little but even people who give thousands and thousands of pounds of money to charity a year are only able to help a tiny amount in the grand scheme of things.

It is up to the GOVERNMENTS of the richer countries such as our own to sort this out, and anything the people can do to help is merely a bonus.

But when our Prime Minister spends billions of pounds on an unjust and illegal war in Iraq rather than putting that money towards solving third world hunger and famine then what f***ing hope have we got.

The Americans had the chance to vote Bush out and didn't. The blood of dying Iraqi's and starving Africans is on the hands of every last C*NT who voted for that evil scumbag.

If the most powerful nation in the world wasn't also the stupidest then perhaps we wouldn't be in this mess.

 

[Yorkie]

DT you sound perfectly normal to me.

There are those who can give it all up to go and work with the homeless, ill, starving and poor.
There are those who donate money so that those who have that 'calling' can go and do it and be funded by those donations.

 

[Gully]

DT, you think about problems and are prepared to talk about them, at least you aren't part of the callous set who just ignore them completely.

 

[Lady Bracknell]

If you were a bad person, DT, it wouldn't occur to you to ask yourself that question.

 

[jonogulls]

DT - When I left the army many moons ago, I felt exactly the same. I'd seen some pretty shit stuff, so decided to do something about it.

Ended spending 2 years in India working for CAFOD (I'm not actually Catholic by the way) - wasn't entirely volountary but, put it this way, I never brought any money back when I came home every year - was living expenses, that kind of thing. Spent time in an orphanage for 6 months, before doing general aid work (ended up a lot of building etc). It was perhaps the most emotionally fulfilling time of my life - I stayed another year after that working as freelance as both a translator and a bodyguard (as well as working back at the orphanage a couple of times a week).

In the end I came back (mainly 'cos I'd hadn't had a proper relationship for FUCKIN' AGES) - but I'm glad I did it. It's hard to get over there in the first place (you have to raise a couple of grand yourself) but I feel like my life has been worth something now. I couldn't go back now (I tell myself) due to family commitments etc - but hope that me and the missus will be able to do something when we get a bit older.

PS - I'd NEVER let a homeless person sleep in my house