Do you think its right to smack kids?

[Dick Knights Mumm]

Funnily we were having this conversation with our now grown up children and we were saying we never smacked them.

And they were both convinced we had .....................

I don't know what that tells anyone - but anyway they seem to have survived.

 

[magoo]

SPANK ME!

 

[Simster]

Funnily we were having this conversation with our now grown up children and we were saying we never smacked them.

And they were both convinced we had .....................

I don't know what that tells anyone - but anyway they seem to have survived.

I've never smacked my daughter and I think I've smacked my 9 y/o son maybe 2 or 3 times, ever.

I don't think any sane parent would actually choose to smack their child because it really isn't very nice.

 

[Biscuit]

Shocked so many have voted no. Sometimes a little git needs a slap. End of. I'm not justifying beating them black and blue but knowing a physical consequence at a young age is better than growing up ignornat and finding out the hard way that actions have consequences.

 

[Dick Knights Mumm]

I've never smacked my daughter and I think I've smacked my 9 y/o son maybe 2 or 3 times, ever.

I don't think any sane parent would actually choose to smack their child because it really isn't very nice.

I suspect the term "smack" is not very helpful - meaning different things to different people.

As I say - I don't think I ever smacked our two - but they seem to think we did. That - as they say - is Lifebuoy.

 

[KneeOn]

Smack? No

A tap? Yes. Both me and my sister were given a tap as a child. Enough to sting on contact but that was it. Never left a mark, never hurt. An embarrassment and a defeat for us as young children. Never with a closed fist, never on somewhere dangerous. Used sparingly.

Maybe i'm just naturally aggressive but i can't see how it would have turned me aggressive because it was used so sparingly.

 

[glasfryn]

Yes and not only that but school holidays should be spent up chimneys and down mines ...............noisy little bastards.








































not mine though they are little angels

 

[Pot noodles for everyone]

Shocked so many have voted no. Sometimes a little git needs a slap. End of. I'm not justifying beating them black and blue but knowing a physical consequence at a young age is better than growing up ignornat and finding out the hard way that actions have consequences.

Maybe some parents are able to get the message across to their children without resorting to physical violence.

 

[Tim Over Whelmed]

To be honest I think we all are at risk of missing one very important point and that is to offer praise freely. We (and I include myself) are quick to focus on the negatives but how freely do we praise? I try to but on balance I would guess more "fuss" is made over naughty aspects rather than good positives?

 

[KneeOn]

To be honest I think we all are at risk of missing one very important point and that is to offer praise freely. We (and I include myself) are quick to focus on the negatives but how freely do we praise? I try to but on balance I would guess more "fuss" is made over naughty aspects rather than good positives?

Token Economy.

You do good things, you work, you get rewards. Fuss and payment. 20p is a lot when your a small child

 

[Tim Over Whelmed]

Token Economy.

You do good things, you work, you get rewards. Fuss and payment. 20p is a lot when your a small child

Bribery, now we're talking. Although Match Attx are the currency of choice in our house

Match Attax Football Cards ... one pack can get a tidy bedroom
Two Packs = Bed made and curtains opened every day
Five Pack Wonder Prize = Cats fed, shoes away and school stuff ready each am!

 

[Brovion]

Never ever smacked either of my two, but I HAVE used force. I remember one occasion we were in a toy shop and my son wanted a radio-controlled car. I said no (it wasn't his birthday or anything), so he took a car off the shelf and tried to leg it out of the shop. I grabbed him and told him him to put it back. He wouldn't, and after a bit of a stand-off with him making more and more noise I forcibly ripped it from his grasp, threw him over my shoulder and carried the yelling kicking screaming wriggling punching little brat out of the shop. I got quite a few looks but I didn't know what else to do,

The things they do when they're seventeen eh?

 

[SULLY COULDNT SHOOT]

Bribery, now we're talking. Although Match Attx are the currency of choice in our house

Match Attax Football Cards ... one pack can get a tidy bedroom
Two Packs = Bed made and curtains opened every day
Five Pack Wonder Prize = Cats fed, shoes away and school stuff ready each am!

I do that but its not 20p anymore..... lot more expensive. During the summer hols my daughter is saving up for strawberry shortcake bag thta costs 20 quid. Shes earning on avergae a pound a day. BTW, shes 4.

 

[Pavilionaire]

It depends on the child. Some kids get a smack and it's like water off a duck's back. Other kids will take ages to get over it.

I give my son a clip round the ear and after the initial shock / disappointment / embarrassment he's over it in 5 minutes. On the other hand my daughter is much less naughty so there's no need to get physical with her.

 

[tedebear]

Been there..done that... 14 barbies and a whole collection of DVDs later .... its all very well in theory but it depends on your child. My wife is stubborn... I am stubborn... ergo stubborn child who knows that toys coem and go.

I restate - hurting is out of order but parenting is a constant pursuit of finding the right method to discipline children without using the easy way out.

But you buy them toys? So they come and go by your hand - why give in when/if they have been naughty?

Our son has never been smacked, and he's a very good kid. He has learnt and continues to learn the difference between good and bad behaviour and the consquences of each. Restriction of Lego does happen everynow and then and it is tough for me to dish out and him to understand, but he now understands and now simply the threat of removal makes him smarten up what ever he is doing.

Stubborn is learnt and can be unlearnt, in the same way selfishness can be unlearnt. We do not yell at each other and we do not hit, respect in all dealings is paramount.

 

[Insel affe]

another point , i was smacked alot and over disciplined as a kid. did it do me any harm ? yes it did in my opinion . i wasnt very happy as a child and as an adult am probably more aggressive than most and more likely to resort to violence in an argument. this is something i hate but seem to be able to control the older i get (40 now). this i directly attribute to being harshly and excessively disciplined as a kid .

so think twice about the longer lasting effects on the child

This, although I got it under control alot younger.

I would never hit mine or anyones kids, You dont know what damage you are doing in the long run. I hate my father for what he did to me.

 

[Dick Knights Mumm]

Never ever smacked either of my two, but I HAVE used force. I remember one occasion we were in a toy shop and my son wanted a radio-controlled car. I said no (it wasn't his birthday or anything), so he took a car off the shelf and tried to leg it out of the shop. I grabbed him and told him him to put it back. He wouldn't, and after a bit of a stand-off with him making more and more noise I forcibly ripped it from his grasp, threw him over my shoulder and carried the yelling kicking screaming wriggling punching little brat out of the shop. I got quite a few looks but I didn't know what else to do,

The things they do when they're seventeen eh?

He should have shouted at the top of his voice "STRANGER DANGER" as per outnumbered.

 

[tedebear]

This, although I got it under control alot younger.

I would never hit mine or anyones kids, You dont know what damage you are doing in the long run. I hate my father for what he did to me.

Agreed...

And furthermore to my point above, yu can get dragged infront of the court for hitting an adult so why is it right to hit your child?

 

[cheshunt seagull]

I smacked my daughter twice when she was little. In neither case was it anything like a hard smack but in both cases I was stressed and short on patience. It didn't help the situation and my authority was all the less for doing it. Calm, assertive and consistent is the effective way IMO, but I won't pretend that is always easy.