Did your ****ing suitcase buy a train ticket ?

[Seagull on the wing]

Siumple answer' Ask pokitely,Please.would you be as kind to move your bag/laptop so I might sit down.?
'Nah,got nowhere to put it!
Just plonk you arse on top of luggage and settle down.
If he asks you to move say,Nah...got nowhere to sit down.

 

[keaton]

Maybe we should have a poll about the most annoying things on trains.
I put my bag on the seat sometimes, but always put in the luggage rack if the train starts filling up.
My hates are:
Talking (unnecessarily)on the phone
Headphone leakage
People who have keypad noises dicking around on their phones

 

[Hiney]

Not strictly related, but these made me laugh

http://prosign.tumblr.com/post/33766157596/someone-has-made-fake-london-underground-signs-and

 

[Tom Hark Preston Park]

Maybe we should have a poll about the most annoying things on trains.
I put my bag on the seat sometimes, but always put in the luggage rack if the train starts filling up.
My hates are:
Talking (unnecessarily)on the phone
Headphone leakage
People who have keypad noises dicking around on their phones

People eating stinky cornish pasties.

 

[Hornblower]

On a related subject, I do like these 'Baby On Board' badges that pregnant women wear. Being a bit of a gent, I always give my seat up for a pregnant woman but it does peeve me when, having done so I come to the slow realisation that the woman wasn't pregnant at all, just overweight.

More badges please, perhaps even one that says: 'Don't Get Up, Not Pregnant Just Fat'.

 

[e77]

Men (and it always seems to be men) who stretch their legs out when sitting opposite someone.

 

[keaton]

People eating stinky cornish pasties.

When I used to commute from London Victoria every carriage seemed to have three of four people with Burger Kings

 

[Hove Seagull]

Not strictly related, but these made me laugh

http://prosign.tumblr.com/post/33766157596/someone-has-made-fake-london-underground-signs-and

Some of these are really funny Hiney

 

[Papa Lazarou]

Men (and it always seems to be men) who stretch their legs out when sitting opposite someone.

Do you mean all the time, or just every now and then? I only ask because I sometimes sit opposite you on the train, and due to a problem with my right ankle I sometimes need to change position and stretch my leg.

 

[sully]

I'd usually stick mine by the door but it's not surprising that some people are worried about doing that, especially if you can't get a seat nearby.

A couple of years ago, my wife had a suitcase stolen from the racks by the door. It's incredible the value of clothes and shoes that can be fitted in a case. This one also had a brand new, boxed digital SLR camera in it. Despite the culprit being caught and found guilty in court, we never saw a penny in compensation. We were totally broke at the time, too, so she spent the next 12 months with nothing decent to wear to work or out.

I can totally sympathise with anyone not wanting to use those racks. The security is non-existent and the rail companies couldn't care less as they say you leave it at your risk.


However, I also hate seat hogs!

 

[Badger]

Maybe we should have a poll about the most annoying things on trains.
I put my bag on the seat sometimes, but always put in the luggage rack if the train starts filling up.
My hates are:
Talking (unnecessarily)on the phone
Headphone leakage
People who have keypad noises dicking around on their phones

What makes this one worse is when the 20 minute conversation ends with "ok, I'll see you about 10 minutes". FFS, have the conversation when you see them

I'll add:
People who hold the newspaper wide open in front of them
People who take their coat off AFTER they sit down
Foot tapping
Sniffers. Blow you're f**king nose.

 

[Shropshire Seagull]

Not strictly related, but these made me laugh

http://prosign.tumblr.com/post/33766157596/someone-has-made-fake-london-underground-signs-and

Like !

 

[dazzer6666]

No particular order :

Sniffers (wot Badger said)
Cases on seats
Feet on chairs
Chomping noisy food, double bad if mouth open as well
Turn off your fecking keypad tones
Sitting in the outside seat then making huge harrumphing noises when someopne asks to sit on the inside one. If you don't want to move, sit on the inside you ****
Pointy elbows encroaching on my side
Big feet opposite too far across to my side
Bags in the aisle or by your feet - use the bloody racks above your head
Snoring (can be funny though)
Apple headphones (fecking useless, we can all hear your music)
Making a 3 minute delay sound like the worst thing that's ever happened (no you don't need to sigh twice and look at your watch three times then make a loud phone call to your missus saying how 'bloody awful' the trains are)
Pushing in front when we are all waiting at the station for the train
Sitting in that horrible middle seat of three in your great big padded jacket. Take your bloody coat off, there'd be more room for everyone
Chewing gum
Food wrappers left on tables
People who eat stuff then throw their rubbish on the floor, ESPECIALLY if they try to do it in a way they think no-one will notice
Stinky food (although I will confess to the odd late night post-pub Cornish pastie myself, the smell is only good if you have one of your own)
Announcements on train being too loud at 6am
Not moving down the aisle when there are problems and it's obvious more people need to get on
FirstCapital trains and their weeny seats (on first-knee terms with lost of other passengers)
Smelly on-train toilets
Laptop users who appear to have hammers for fingers and batter their way to London every morning

Well, that's made me feel better. Wouldn't want to drive to work, far less stressful by train.

 

[Tricky Dicky]

"Turn off your fecking keypad tones "

This, this and VERY this.

 

[Tom Hark Preston Park]

No particular order :

Sniffers (wot Badger said)
Cases on seats
Feet on chairs
Chomping noisy food, double bad if mouth open as well
Turn off your fecking keypad tones
Sitting in the outside seat then making huge harrumphing noises when someopne asks to sit on the inside one. If you don't want to move, sit on the inside you ****
Pointy elbows encroaching on my side
Big feet opposite too far across to my side
Bags in the aisle or by your feet - use the bloody racks above your head
Snoring (can be funny though)
Apple headphones (fecking useless, we can all hear your music)
Making a 3 minute delay sound like the worst thing that's ever happened (no you don't need to sigh twice and look at your watch three times then make a loud phone call to your missus saying how 'bloody awful' the trains are)
Pushing in front when we are all waiting at the station for the train
Sitting in that horrible middle seat of three in your great big padded jacket. Take your bloody coat off, there'd be more room for everyone
Chewing gum
Food wrappers left on tables
People who eat stuff then throw their rubbish on the floor, ESPECIALLY if they try to do it in a way they think no-one will notice
Stinky food (although I will confess to the odd late night post-pub Cornish pastie myself, the smell is only good if you have one of your own)
Announcements on train being too loud at 6am
Not moving down the aisle when there are problems and it's obvious more people need to get on
FirstCapital trains and their weeny seats (on first-knee terms with lost of other passengers)
Smelly on-train toilets
Laptop users who appear to have hammers for fingers and batter their way to London every morning

Well, that's made me feel better. Wouldn't want to drive to work, far less stressful by train.

Reckon this should be a poster put up in every carriage.
Maybe with the headline "DON'T BE A TRAIN WANKER"

 

[e77]

Do you mean all the time, or just every now and then? I only ask because I sometimes sit opposite you on the train, and due to a problem with my right ankle I sometimes need to change position and stretch my leg.

Some people do it all the time (more so in seats without a table in the middle for some reason).

I also add blokes who can't sit with their legs together to my list.

 

[e77]

Also:

Anyone reading a free paper who hasn't learnt to fold as they read.

Train Conductors who think they are the reincarnation of John Arlott and offer a full running commentary of your early morning journey.

People who suddenly go blind when someone on crutches or is pregnant gets on a train and there are no seats left (tends to be worse the nearer you get to London).

East Croydon station.

 

[Thunder Bolt]

Reckon this should be a poster put up in every carriage.
Maybe with the headline "DON'T BE A TRAIN WANKER"

There's plenty of those on uncrowded trains. Literally.

 

[Badger]

Apple headphones (fecking useless, we can all hear your music)

Someone really needs to file a lawsuit against Apple for this, they've caused misery to MILLIONS.

 

[worthingseagull123]

A couple of years ago, my wife had a suitcase stolen from the racks by the door. It's incredible the value of clothes and shoes that can be fitted in a case. This one also had a brand new, boxed digital SLR camera in it. Despite the culprit being caught and found guilty in court, we never saw a penny in compensation. We were totally broke at the time, too, so she spent the next 12 months with nothing decent to wear to work or out.

I can totally sympathise with anyone not wanting to use those racks. The security is non-existent and the rail companies couldn't care less as they say you leave it at your risk.


However, I also hate seat hogs!

If peoples possessions are valuable then stand with them by the doors. But on busy services, if they have them on seats, they will be challenged and will have to move them.