Did your ****ing suitcase buy a train ticket ?

[PWA]

Got on a bus the other day to Streatham and there was a dog laid out on two seats on the top deck. I was pretty sure the fella in the seats behind was his owner. For a laugh I went up to the dog and said "Do you mind moving over?" There were a load of schoolkids on there who found it quite funny. The bloke was off his tits and it was about 8:30 in the morning. Quite depressing really but the kids thought this dog stretched out was hilarious. The dog was pretty well behaved too. But he wouldn't move over.

Brilliant. Excuse me Rover, would you mind moving over?

 

[Shropshire Seagull]

The classic is putting the bag by the window and sitting in the aisle seat. May I recommend that everyone targets these people even if there are other seats available. They know exactly what they are doing and it's always entertaining to watch them as they go through the same process: pretend they don't know you are there; look up and around as if they have just noticed you and to suggest that other seats should be used - easier for everyone; look perturbed when it is clear you want the seat their bag is using; watch them sigh and huff and puff as they slowly pick up the bag as if it is the density of star matter (7 tonnes per cubic inch btw) whilst hoping that you will cave and go somewhere else to avoid them having to make such a sacrifice; watch the look of seething resentment roll across their visage when they realise you're making them free up the seat because you have rumbled them; watch them struggle to look as if they wanted you to sit in the seat all along; enjoy their rictus grin for the rest of the journey knowing that they despise every cell in your body.

I'm loving commuting again. There is one of these on my route most days and by now she knows I'm coming for her. Must drive her mad.

7 tones per sq cm - we are talking the sun here [that is a star, yes?]
I thought the sun was made up of gasses? [predominately hydrogen = one of the lightest gasses]
Keen to learn how and when this was measured, and from which star. Do they all weigh the same?
Not saying you're wrong, just asking, like.

 

[User removed 4]

I don't see why commuters make such a big deal out of this. Some people don't commute every day and as a result don't know any better, just ask nicely and everything will be ok. I've seen it happen loads of times, getting arsey just makes you look like a moron. Feeling like you've been empowered to be rude to people just because you travel a long way to work is more a reflection that your life has become empty and meaningless, bereft of empathy or understanding. If the only joy you can experience during that journey is because you behaved in a sour, agressive manner then I feel quite sorry for you. The people leaving bags on the seat probably don't think twice about it.

do you commute billy ? I'd say it's about 50/50 in between people moving bags without a fuss and the other 50% Huffing and puffing and enquiring ' where to ?' when asked , I just suggest that they stand up while I sit next to their bag if they want it to have a seat that badly, that usually gets it moved , if there are no seats and they flatly refuse then I just move the bag or case myself.

 

[willyfantastic]

Just ask. What's the problem? I remember once getting onto a train at Kings Lynn, it's the first and last station so hardly ever busy. I put my bag beside me as it had bits and bobs I wanted to use during the journey in it. Just kind of drifted off into my own world and didn't notice the carriage filling up. Next thing I hear "Buy two tickets did you? BUY TWO TICKETS DID YOU?" Some big fat shaky woman with a cat in a basket needed the seat. She really got my back up. She was making a right fuss muttering at me under her breath as she arranged her cat and whatnot so I said to her, quite calmly

"I've freed up the seat so there's no need to keep on, sit down or **** off but either way, shut up"

Also true: about ten mins later her cat shit diareah in its basket down by her feet. Luckily it had a curbed solid bottom so didn't run out but is reeked. I'm trying to ignore it, gazing out the window with my headphones on when I get poked in the shoulder.

"You don't have to turn your nose up at her, it's not HER FAULT!!! SHE GETS NERVOUS"

Unbeknownst to me someone else had called the ticket bod and she was asked to take the cat off the train for H&S reasons at Cambridge. Thank god.

Anyway, yes, it's nice when people are a bit more aware, especially on a train that is bound to be packed.

sounds like one of those nutcase cat-women

 

[BBassic]

I never understood the putting of bags on seats. There are shelves above the seats, spaces under your feet and your own lap as well.

 

[Return of the Rev]

I never understood the putting of bags on seats. There are shelves above the seats, spaces under your feet and your own lap as well.

To stop smelly people sitting next to you?

 

[Billy the Fish]

do you commute billy ? I'd say it's about 50/50 in between people moving bags without a fuss and the other 50% Huffing and puffing and enquiring ' where to ?' when asked , I just suggest that they stand up while I sit next to their bag if they want it to have a seat that badly, that usually gets it moved , if there are no seats and they flatly refuse then I just move the bag or case myself.

Not that much any more because most of my work is in the suburbs and I tend to drive, but occasionally I still do.
If the people with bags make a fuss or refuse to do it then it's obviously a different story and they deserve to be put right a bit more firmly, but I've seen it a few times, usually at croydon, where someone has moved their bag straight away and the person asking has carried on at them afterwards. Croydon seems to be set up for it with people carrying luggage getting on a half empty train at Gatwick and then lots of passengers getting on at Croydon.

 

[Papa Lazarou]

Similar, but slightly different are the people who seemingly refuse to use the overhead racks for their bags and other sh*t. You end up with about a square cm or 2 to put your feet, with no chance to move or stretch.

 

[disgruntled h blocker]

I regulary ask people to move their bags and would in fact rather ask someone to move their bag than to sit in a seat which is vacant, primarily because they do that for a reason - to ensure no one sits next to them...

On a very busy Cross-Country service once I found the last spare seat on the train but it had someones suitcase on - I told him to move it, he said "where?" - my response "that's not my problem". He got rather peeved off when I told him I was just going one stop!

 

[BrianWade4]

I hear yer Wookiee. I make a beeline for those selfish *******s on purpose when I'm getting on a busy train.

This.

 

[CheeseRolls]

I have seen one particularly obese gentleman, travelling on the rammed West London line, brandish two tickets when challenged by fellow passengers. Kudos to the big fella, you have to admire his self-awareness, even if you question his lifestyle.

 

[Tom Hark Preston Park]

I feel really sorry sometimes for the innocent infrequent traveller/tourist on our rail network who happens to inadvertently fall foul of the twitching ball of neurosis that is a Metro-reading rush hour lifer commuter. Poor devil's got no chance against such thinly-veiled psychotic venom.

 

[pasty]

I feel really sorry sometimes for the innocent infrequent traveller/tourist on our rail network who happens to inadvertently fall foul of the twitching ball of neurosis that is a Metro-reading rush hour lifer commuter. Poor devil's got no chance against such thinly-veiled psychotic venom.

Nah, bollox to them. Infrequent travellers/tourists should only be allowed on off-peak trains

 

[Couldn't Be Hyypia]

Atom for atom hydrogen is one of the lightest gasses, like you said. However, if you pack the atoms very closely then you can make something heavier than if you loosely pack heavier atoms together (in the same space as the hydrogen). Stars are incredibly dense and so have very closely packed atoms. You can get some stars which are the size of cities but have the mass of several hundred thousand Earths, which is a lot of squashing!

I recall reading the 7T per cubic inch in a Patrick Moore book years ago. But it seems there are stars with mass far greater than that. Have a look here if you're interested - http://physics.uoregon.edu/~jimbrau/astr122/notes/chapter22.html

"A single thimbleful of neutron-star material would weigh 100 million tons or more, as much as a good-sized mountain on Earth"

 

[mejonaNO12 aka riskit]

Had on one of my journeys from London Bridge to Brighton a woman already on the train as I tried to get on. She was standing but about halfway down the carriage. I mean she had a GOOD 10 yards behind her. A LOT of room to move down. People were BANGING on the windows shouting at her to move down so we could get on. People IN the train were shouting at her. She wouldnt budge. "I've not got enough room" she said.

Eventually people just PUSHED HER and we got on.

Anyway at Croydon a lot of people got off as per usual. Suddenly there were two seats left and 3 of us standing. Me, HER and another gentlemen who got on when I did.

The gentelmen literally RAN to the first seat and sat down. He put his bag on the second seat and stared at the lady.

"Can I sit down?" she asked. "No". He replied bluntly. "I don't have enough room"

He then looked at me and said "would you like this seat?".

"Yes, that would be very kind" I said, and I sat down. The woman was FUMING a lot of peope applauded and certainly let her know what they thought of her.

 

[Puppet Master]

This is why I detest public transport. People are shit.

 

[Badger]

Nah, bollox to them. Infrequent travellers/tourists should only be allowed on off-peak trains

Indeed, the same applies to CHILDREN, I don't care if it is the school holidays there really is no need for you to subject your screaming 5-year-old to people who have spent the day at work and just want to get home.

 

[Badger]

Oh, and on a similar note to the OP:

Did your ELBOW pay for half of my seat?

 

[mikeyjh]

I particularly enjoyed this fine example today at Shoreham, this bloke clearly cares for his case. Needless to say, it got pride of place by the window on the train.

 

[Husty]

I particularly enjoyed this fine example today at Shoreham, this bloke clearly cares for his case. Needless to say, it got pride of place by the window on the train.

I go out of my way to sit next to and generally annoy people like this on trains.