[Cricket] (Dickheads in) club cricket.

[Guinness Boy]

Our Group Director in the Channel Islands obviously used to be a cricketer in his time and asked if he could play for the office team. He was a half-decent spin bowler as it turned out but in his 50s. We had a decent team at the time and were pretty competitive.......

I was opening the bowling once against our fiercest rivals, bounced the opening bat who gloved it straight to him at gulley, whereupon he obviously dropped it.

Shouting “FFS you useless ******g t***t” wasn’t a career-progressing comment on my part.

I was ran out in all of my first five innings of 1998.

I'm not sure that isn't a record.

 

[ForestRowSeagull]

I played village cricket for Hartfield for years. Just wondered if I might have played against any of you?

Suspect so! They don't have a Saturday team anymore though.

 

[Mr Putdown]

Suspect so! They don't have a Saturday team anymore though.

I’m not sure what’s happened to Hartfield CC, seems to have really gone downhill. Several of the players I’m still in touch with, now play for Colemans Hatch.

 

[ForestRowSeagull]

I’m not sure what’s happened to Hartfield CC, seems to have really gone downhill. Several of the players I’m still in touch with, now play for Colemans Hatch.

Colemans Hatch were struggling too a few years back but seem ok now. Most clubs around are struggling to be honest - Turners Hill announced they're folding yesterday. When I worked in The Gallipot a few years back the Colemans Hatch team used to have their post match beers in there, a nice bunch of blokes.

 

[Eric Youngs Contact Lense]

I came across a fair few of those "neutral" umpires playing in Sussex. Special mention to the old guy who umpires the Burgess Hill 2nd XI. His finger would be up before the bowler had even considered appealing. There was a game I played where we were something like 23/5 with 4 of the dismissals being very suspect LBW decisions.

Then there's the teams who try to cheat their way to wickets when they see there's an inexperienced umpire. If the ball goes anywhere near the pads or the keeper takes a catch, the whole team goes up screaming their appeal at the umpire.

I remember that happening to me.. as a 16-17 year old, (used to field well, which says everything you need to know about my overall cricketing prowess!) but was asked one week to open the umpiring whilst "my" team were in the field - I had popped up to watch the game as it was a good place to get a beer under-age. I said yes and was told that it would just be about counting how many balls were bowled and making a call on run-outs. I accepted, donned the white coat and went out, happy to help out. The very first over and the opening bowler, rattled the pads, and went up in a huge, aggressive appeal. Everyone looked at me.. I thought "well I think the ball was going to hit the wicket" and put my finger up. Suffice to say the opening bat was horrified and furious, storming off. I sought solace with the other opening bat, who said its a little more complicated , something involving left-handed bowlers and batsmen. At tea, I approached our opening bowler who laughed and said it was never out, but he knew I would give it to which I told him to "f*** off" and never umpired again!

 

[hans kraay fan club]

Not thread on Sussex cricketing bell cheeses would be complete tales of Mayfield cricket and importing south African near internationals to bowl 95mph at spotty teens and gentlemen whose reflexes are at best somewhat dulled by age and beer.

Meyrick Pringle steaming in on the variable track at Victoria Park, Portslade, anyone?

 

[Moshe Gariani]

Meyrick Pringle steaming in on the variable track at Victoria Park, Portslade, anyone?

Sounds like fun...

Everyone who has played recreational cricket will have their own stories about cheating umpires, cheating players, delayed declarations, general bellendery, "ringers" or whole team mis-matches badly handled...

About 30 years ago I played for Barns Green in the Gullick Cup against "Horsham Hockey Club"... turns out one of Horsham's finest stickmen at the time, Tim "Ken" Dodd, was also a Minor Counties seam bowling allrounder..!! Great. His decision to bowl at full speed against us village batsmen in the evening gloom was an interesting one... I notice he is still playing now for Wisborough Green and is probably a lovely bloke and gentleman cricketer.

 

[dazzer6666]

Sounds like fun...

Everyone who has played recreational cricket will have their own stories about cheating umpires, cheating players, delayed declarations, general bellendery, "ringers" or whole team mis-matches badly handled...

About 30 years ago I played for Barns Green in the Gullick Cup against "Horsham Hockey Club"... turns out one of Horsham's finest stickmen at the time, Tim "Ken" Dodd, was also a Minor Counties seam bowling allrounder..!! Great. His decision to bowl at full speed against us village batsmen in the evening gloom was an interesting one... I notice he is still playing now for Wisborough Green and is probably a lovely bloke and gentleman cricketer.

Speaking of mis-matches, have a look at Michael Gould's record this season in Division 6 West of the SCL. The league insisted on RMU starting at the bottom about 4 years ago when they took over another team's registration, so week after week they are mostly battering whoever they come up against, and have done for the last 3 seasons. When we played them (our 2nds) we got him out for about 110, in the 12th over.

http://rmu.play-cricket.com/website/web_pages/161936

 

[hans kraay fan club]

Speaking of mis-matches, have a look at Michael Gould's record this season in Division 6 West of the SCL. The league insisted on RMU starting at the bottom about 4 years ago when they took over another team's registration, so week after week they are mostly battering whoever they come up against, and have done for the last 3 seasons. When we played them (our 2nds) we got him out for about 110, in the 12th over.

http://rmu.play-cricket.com/website/web_pages/161936

He's the lad allegedly on £2/run, yes?

 

[Eric Youngs Contact Lense]

Speaking of mis-matches, have a look at Michael Gould's record this season in Division 6 West of the SCL. The league insisted on RMU starting at the bottom about 4 years ago when they took over another team's registration, so week after week they are mostly battering whoever they come up against, and have done for the last 3 seasons. When we played them (our 2nds) we got him out for about 110, in the 12th over.

http://rmu.play-cricket.com/website/web_pages/161936

Highest score of 223!!! At what stage in Village cricket does someone "retire" from an innings

 

[Moshe Gariani]

Speaking of mis-matches, have a look at Michael Gould's record this season in Division 6 West of the SCL. The league insisted on RMU starting at the bottom about 4 years ago when they took over another team's registration, so week after week they are mostly battering whoever they come up against, and have done for the last 3 seasons. When we played them (our 2nds) we got him out for about 110, in the 12th over.

http://rmu.play-cricket.com/website/web_pages/161936

Not very clever stuff, is it.

Cricket as a sport faces a huge challenge to maintain its position as mass participation activity and important in the fabric of modern community life.

There is so much good work being done in Sussex by passionate individuals, clubs, schools and organisations such as the Sussex Cricket Foundation, and the Arundel Castle Cricket Foundation, to promote cricket in all areas of the community and especially amongst children and young people. But the good work is easily undermined by negative early experiences of adult cricket.

The days when youngsters would happily run from fine leg to fine leg in exchange for a bag of crisps and a bottle of pop after the game are long gone..

 

[dazzer6666]

He's the lad allegedly on £2/run, yes?

Apparently......quite a few clubs in the league have a paid player or two though - we did 2/3 years ago. At £2/run, with his scoring rate, he'd end up with a similar amount to what I understand we paid our 'Director of Cricket' (it was a one-season experiment, not since repeated). Gould was close to county standard - ridiculous that he's playing in basically village cricket (he's the son of Ian, former Sussex keeper). I've never seen the ball hit so hard, so often in any game I've played.

 

[hans kraay fan club]

Highest score of 223!!!

Highest score THIS year.

2017 it was 207, 2015 - 273, 2014 (RMU for season in the lowest league) - 275n/o...

http://rmu.play-cricket.com/website...ing_stats/1898446?from=stats&rule_type_id=179

 

[Moshe Gariani]

This looks like a particularly good game of cricket. No doubt enjoyed by all...

http://rmu.play-cricket.com/website/results/2121226

 

[dazzer6666]

Highest score of 223!!! At what stage in Village cricket does someone "retire" from an innings

Not in the league......the team, for half the season, can declare a bit early and give their overs to the other team (game is max 90 I think, first innings 47). Rest of the season (first and final quarters) is 40/40

Not very clever stuff, is it.

Cricket as a sport faces a huge challenge to maintain its position as mass participation activity and important in the fabric of modern community life.

There is so much good work being done in Sussex by passionate individuals, clubs, schools and organisations such as the Sussex Cricket Foundation, and the Arundel Castle Cricket Foundation, to promote cricket in all areas of the community and especially amongst children and young people. But the good work is easily undermined by negative early experiences of adult cricket.

The days

Absolutely correct. When I was say 14, playing in something like Div 5/6 of the Sussex League would have been a great test and good development. Now, any kid doing so is going to be sworn at, sledged, intimidated and might spend 2.5 hours having someone like Gould slamming their bowling into the nearby road ball after ball. No surprise a lot decide to pack it in. Such a shame.

 

[Eric Youngs Contact Lense]

Highest score THIS year.

2017 it was 207, 2015 - 273, 2014 (RMU for season in the lowest league) - 275n/o...

http://rmu.play-cricket.com/website...ing_stats/1898446?from=stats&rule_type_id=179

So, apart from last years anomaly, he's getting worse ... needs to get his head down and concentrate..

 

[dazzer6666]

So, apart from last years anomaly, he's getting worse ... needs to get his head down and concentrate..

Nah, he's just finding things MUCH more difficult as they move up the leagues

 

[Rodney Thomas]

Speaking of mis-matches, have a look at Michael Gould's record this season in Division 6 West of the SCL. The league insisted on RMU starting at the bottom about 4 years ago when they took over another team's registration, so week after week they are mostly battering whoever they come up against, and have done for the last 3 seasons. When we played them (our 2nds) we got him out for about 110, in the 12th over.

http://rmu.play-cricket.com/website/web_pages/161936

Haha I recognise some proper dickheads who I played with/against in that list.

 

[BensGrandad]

We've discussed this before - I've described how I turned my back on League cricket years ago, due to the proliferation of dinlows taking themselves too seriously.

Spotted this on the BBC, from over the weekend.

Opposition batsman on 98 - two runs short of his first ever ton, with two runs needed to win the game. So the opposition bowler chucks a deliberate no-ball to the boundary to finish the game. What an utter, utter prick.

https://www.bbc.com/sport/cricket/45075013

Just read his league have banned him for 9 games. not sure if its been mentioned.. if it has sorry.

 

[blue-afro-man]

Sounds like fun...

Everyone who has played recreational cricket will have their own stories about cheating umpires, cheating players, delayed declarations, general bellendery, "ringers" or whole team mis-matches badly handled...

About 30 years ago I played for Barns Green in the Gullick Cup against "Horsham Hockey Club"... turns out one of Horsham's finest stickmen at the time, Tim "Ken" Dodd, was also a Minor Counties seam bowling allrounder..!! Great. His decision to bowl at full speed against us village batsmen in the evening gloom was an interesting one... I notice he is still playing now for Wisborough Green and is probably a lovely bloke and gentleman cricketer.

I opened the batting for Barns Green that match. Was on the artificial wicket too. I remember “Ken” removed my middle and leg stump from the ground in near darkness.


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