Just hire out a school canteen, put in a Fosters tap and crank up the strip lighting for the perfect 'mood lighting' and hey presto! An instant Dick's Bar.
Don't forget a framed shirt of a particularly forgetabble loan signing from the Withdean years (Jason Jarrett will do). Throw in a lovely photo of everyone's favourite forward Glenn Murray to greet you on the way in and there you have the particularly authentic Dicks experience.