Ernest
Stupid IDIOT
Wrongly I thought last nights GAME would be BELL end free so I had the idea I'd take my EIGHT year old nephew TUBBY to his FIRST AMEX game. People often THINK Tubby is my MINI me as we are like TWO peas in a POD and he was DEAD excited to see BURNO in his last game and I'd also heard a rumour SALTER was going to say FAREWELL as his contract was not RENEWED.
A couple of rows in FRONT of us were two SKINNY and very SPOTTY youths who had obvious had a pint of SHANDY before hand as they were acting like BELL ends and their SIGNING was TERRIBLE, I kept WARNING them they were signing too FAST and were not in TUNE but they IGNORED me all the time.
In the end I lost my COOL when they SANG 'Sussex by the SEA' so fast that they had already gone up and won the CUP before MOST people had got to Sussex by the Sea the second time. I EXPLODED with anger as they were upsetting TUBBY by SIGNING too fast and I didn't want his first AMEX experience to be such a BAD one.
I offered both of them OUTSIDE and told them I'd take both of their heads off and they wouldn't be able to SIGN fast ever again. As I was LOOSING my COOL I noticed some WEIRD looking chap STARING at me and next to him to my HORROR I saw the IDIOT whose Albion WINTER coat I ACCIDENTALLY took from DICKS a few years back and I didn't want to have to take his HEAD off as well so I grabbed TUBBY and said we better leave.
Still you'll be pleased to know TUBBY is OK and I'm taking him to the West Ham game as he ENJOYED last night so much.
A couple of rows in FRONT of us were two SKINNY and very SPOTTY youths who had obvious had a pint of SHANDY before hand as they were acting like BELL ends and their SIGNING was TERRIBLE, I kept WARNING them they were signing too FAST and were not in TUNE but they IGNORED me all the time.
In the end I lost my COOL when they SANG 'Sussex by the SEA' so fast that they had already gone up and won the CUP before MOST people had got to Sussex by the Sea the second time. I EXPLODED with anger as they were upsetting TUBBY by SIGNING too fast and I didn't want his first AMEX experience to be such a BAD one.
I offered both of them OUTSIDE and told them I'd take both of their heads off and they wouldn't be able to SIGN fast ever again. As I was LOOSING my COOL I noticed some WEIRD looking chap STARING at me and next to him to my HORROR I saw the IDIOT whose Albion WINTER coat I ACCIDENTALLY took from DICKS a few years back and I didn't want to have to take his HEAD off as well so I grabbed TUBBY and said we better leave.
Still you'll be pleased to know TUBBY is OK and I'm taking him to the West Ham game as he ENJOYED last night so much.