[Albion] Crimes against the Albion

[GJN1]

There have been an increasing number of threads recently demanding a variety of punishments ranging from loyalty points deductions to execution for 'crimes' such as leaving early and non-attendence by ST holders.

I think we should compile a list of these, each with a suitable punishment so we can clear it all up once and for all.

As the late Ron Pickering used to say at the end of We Are The Champions... AWAY YOU GO!

 

[Return of the Rev]

Not attending Palace game brings the punishment of having to wear a tin pot on your head whenever we play a top 6 side.

 

[Brian Munich]

Thinking that Piglets Pies are not actually that special and that the pastry is drier than Caroline Lucas's fanny.

 

[neilbard]

Thinking that Piglets Pies are not actually that special and that the pastry is drier than Caroline Lucas's fanny.

Surely not that dry?

 

[Worried Man Blues]

Execution's too good for them, just a stoning will do.

 

[Baker lite]

Early leavers should be branded, A large E L Seared into their forehead,awful shite that they are.


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[Tom Hark Preston Park]

Anyone leaving their seat on 35-44 minutes to buy a pint should be forced by bye-law to buy a pint of Fosters.

 

[Stat Brother]

Anyone leaving their seat on 35-44 minutes to buy a pint should be forced by bye-law to buy a pint of Fosters.

If you're the sort of person to leave between 35 & 44, I bet you're also the sort of person who drinks Fosters.

 

[Tom Hark Preston Park]

If you're the sort of person to leave between 35 & 44, I bet you're also the sort of person who drinks Fosters.

Good point, well made.

 

[el punal]

Thinking that Piglets Pies are not actually that special and that the pastry is drier than Caroline Lucas's fanny.

And you know that for a fact?

 

[el punal]

OMG!! WTF!! What will happen to those fans with half n' half scarves?

 

[Hampster Gull]

For those “fans” who incessantly moan about our players throughout a season, not just the odd moan but incessant moaning, their loyalty points will be cancelled and distributed to those more rational fans within listening distance.

 

[sully]

OMG!! WTF!! What will happen to those fans with half n' half scarves?

That one’s easy.

Summary execution. No exceptions.

 

[A1X]

Clapping the away fans for coming when the attendance is announced - horse-whipped on the seafront

 

[neilbard]

For those “fans” who incessantly moan about our players throughout a season, not just the odd moan but incessant moaning, their loyalty points will be cancelled and distributed to those more rational fans within listening distance.

Rational fans? Best of luck with your search.

 

[Thunder Bolt]

Bans from starting threads on Nsc, for those who moan about fellow Brighton fans.

 

[Yoda]

If you're the sort of person to leave between 35 & 44, I bet you're also the sort of person who drinks Fosters.

How about they should be made to pay for everyone's drink in that stand/tier?

 

[cjd]

Bans from starting threads on Nsc, for those who moan about fellow Brighton fans.

The only sensible post on this thread so far.

Thunder Bolt will obviously have to be stoned.

 

[Brian Munich]

And you know that for a fact?

I heard it gets moist in the presence of fat men with beards.

 

[GJN1]

Clapping the away fans for coming when the attendance is announced - horse-whipped on the seafront

They've stopped doing this now, haven't they?