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Country folk - HOW do you cope?



Colossal Squid

Returning video tapes
Feb 11, 2010
4,906
Under the sea
This week I am house/dog sitting for my folks who have buggered off on yet another holiday. Their house is in the country and it's boring as f***.

The internet is SLOW, the telly only gets FIVE channels, there are no f***ing SHOPS, I have to DRIVE to get anywhere even remotely civilised and frankly I'm not a fan.

But it got me thinking, genuinely, in this day and age how do people cope with life in the sticks? Being unable to rely on public transport and having shitty internet are the big things for me. If I want to go out and get drunk then I have a choice of THREE pubs within walking distance and that's it, everything else requires me to DRIVE. Back home in Brighton I have over 300 pubs within walking distance and any number of local buses will take me to watering holes further afield should I so desire.

But THREE measly pubs?

This must be what it's like IN PRISON
 




Rusthall Seagull

New member
Jul 16, 2003
2,119
Tunbridge wells
This week I am house/dog sitting for my folks who have buggered off on yet another holiday. Their house is in the country and it's boring as f***.

The internet is SLOW, the telly only gets FIVE channels, there are no f***ing SHOPS, I have to DRIVE to get anywhere even remotely civilised and frankly I'm not a fan.

But it got me thinking, genuinely, in this day and age how do people cope with life in the sticks? Being unable to rely on public transport and having shitty internet are the big things for me. If I want to go out and get drunk then I have a choice of THREE pubs within walking distance and that's it, everything else requires me to DRIVE. Back home in Brighton I have over 300 pubs within walking distance and any number of local buses will take me to watering holes further afield should I so desire.

But THREE measly pubs?

This must be what it's like IN PRISON

by going to one of the 3 pubs with my mates.... and not relying on the internet to entertain me outside of work.
 


The Antikythera Mechanism

The oldest known computer
NSC Patron
Aug 7, 2003
8,090
I live in a hamlet, no pubs or shops. Nearest pub is a 30 minute walk along bridleway. Lovely on a summer evening, but a bit muddy in the winter.
 


Commander

Arrogant Prat
NSC Patron
Apr 28, 2004
13,562
London
This week I am house/dog sitting for my folks who have buggered off on yet another holiday. Their house is in the country and it's boring as f***.

The internet is SLOW, the telly only gets FIVE channels, there are no f***ing SHOPS, I have to DRIVE to get anywhere even remotely civilised and frankly I'm not a fan.

But it got me thinking, genuinely, in this day and age how do people cope with life in the sticks? Being unable to rely on public transport and having shitty internet are the big things for me. If I want to go out and get drunk then I have a choice of THREE pubs within walking distance and that's it, everything else requires me to DRIVE. Back home in Brighton I have over 300 pubs within walking distance and any number of local buses will take me to watering holes further afield should I so desire.

But THREE measly pubs?

This must be what it's like IN PRISON

Having lived in London for 5 years I cant understand how you cope with living in Brighton.
 


Falkor

Banned
Jun 3, 2011
5,673
i like it in the sticks, that sad im not really im about a 2min walk from the countryside but in Ashford im about 20min walk from the country side.

I love down here a million times better to anywhere else i have lived
 




Superphil

Dismember
Jul 7, 2003
25,679
In a pile of football shirts
How do I cope. Well, it doesn't stink here. There is very little traffic, few cars, and almost no commercial vehicles. There are no gulls pecking at bin bags. There are no bin bags. The air is clean. It is quiet and dark at night. There are 3 excellent pubs within walking distance. There is never any trouble in the 3 pubs. I almost never hear a siren. There are no chuggers. There is never any sick on the pavement. There is no rubbish strewn all over the place. There are no posters stuck up all over the place. Banksy (or his copycats) have not vandalised anywhere here. There is no other graffiti either. I have a garage. I have a driveway. I can park my car anywhere I like with no fear of traffic wardens. There are no yellow lines on the road. My neighbours talk to me. There is a field with a horse in it less than 25 yards from my front door. I have a woodpecker nest in a tree in my garden. I have loads of trees in my garden. I have the internet. I have 6000kbps internet. I have satellite TV. I have never got stuck in traffic here. There is a shop which sells pretty much everything. There is a butchers next door to the shop. There is a farm shop that sells fresh produce, at sensible prices. I am working with the patio doors open with plenty of the fresh air flooding in. I just heard the horse neigh.

Oh, and I can get in my car, or hop on a bus and get to the coast in no time at all.

Apart from that, I struggle.
 


Biscuit

Native Creative
Jul 8, 2003
22,320
Brighton
You should be asking how do city folk cope?

Bad air, no greenery, poor light, strikes, over crowded tubes/buses, gridlock and stress. Give me the country any day.
 


Digweeds Trousers

New member
May 17, 2004
2,079
Tunbridge Wells
I hate town bars now - I love small village pubs. Becuase I look like a ham-fisted in-bred whose been banging next doors donkey, I fit in a treat. I feel part of the fabric of the community.
 




fruitnveg

Well-known member
Jul 22, 2010
2,256
Waitrose. Veg aisles
You should be asking how do city folk cope?

Bad air, no greenery, poor light, strikes, over crowded tubes/buses, gridlock and stress. Give me the country any day.
Absolutely this. I love it in the country. Its quiet.

Clear nights are especially entertaining for me, Love staring into space, tis bloody marvelous.
 




Gritt23

New member
Jul 7, 2003
14,902
Meopham, Kent.
This week I am house/dog sitting for my folks who have buggered off on yet another holiday. Their house is in the country and it's boring as f***.

The internet is SLOW, the telly only gets FIVE channels, there are no f***ing SHOPS, I have to DRIVE to get anywhere even remotely civilised and frankly I'm not a fan.

But it got me thinking, genuinely, in this day and age how do people cope with life in the sticks? Being unable to rely on public transport and having shitty internet are the big things for me. If I want to go out and get drunk then I have a choice of THREE pubs within walking distance and that's it, everything else requires me to DRIVE. Back home in Brighton I have over 300 pubs within walking distance and any number of local buses will take me to watering holes further afield should I so desire.

But THREE measly pubs?

This must be what it's like IN PRISON

"only gets FIVE channels"?

So, satellites fly around the whole planets beaming pictures around from one side of the WORLD to the other in fractions of a second, and yet you are telling me the technology cannot reach a country village? I think that's more to do with the owners not wanting any more than 5 channels, rather than it being in the country.
 




Falkor

Banned
Jun 3, 2011
5,673
"only gets FIVE channels"?

So, satellites fly around the whole planets beaming pictures around from one side of the WORLD to the other in fractions of a second, and yet you are telling me the technology cannot reach a country village? I think that's more to do with the owners not wanting any more than 5 channels, rather than it being in the country.

we cant get freeview were i am in nehaven
 


Colossal Squid

Returning video tapes
Feb 11, 2010
4,906
Under the sea
Well I guess it's different strokes for different folks but I'm DEFINITELY a city boy.

Some of the things other people quote as negatives from the city I actually miss. I like seagulls and I like the hustle and bustle on the streets outside. The buses may be crowded but I'd still rather have them than NOTHING. And as for bad air, I live by the sea which has lovely FRESH air which the Victorians swore by. If I lived in downtown Croydon I'd see your point perhaps, but I dont think it's fair to moan about the quality of air in Brighton given how much open space there is.

At least one of the few channels I can get is BBC 1 so I can enjoy tonight's Apprentice. Suppose that's something
 


Commander

Arrogant Prat
NSC Patron
Apr 28, 2004
13,562
London
More restuarants, more bars, more money, no need to drive everywhere, better transport links, closer to airports, more people, more friends, more to do generally, Thursday night drinks after work, more culture, more diversity, less country bumbling idiots, no buses that take an hour and a half to do a 20 minute journey, better social scene, etc etc.

All that said, 5 more years of London town and I'm moving back to the countryside again. I cant see how anyone would want to live in a big city forever.
 




Colossal Squid

Returning video tapes
Feb 11, 2010
4,906
Under the sea
"only gets FIVE channels"?

So, satellites fly around the whole planets beaming pictures around from one side of the WORLD to the other in fractions of a second, and yet you are telling me the technology cannot reach a country village? I think that's more to do with the owners not wanting any more than 5 channels, rather than it being in the country.

Well yes, if they really WANTED lots of channels they could PAY for satellite TV but I'm used to living in the city where you don't NEED to rely on a dish to have multi channel telly.

I can use the computer to try and stream telly of course, but it's f***ing hard work due to the piss poor quality of the internet connection (which isn't something you can pay to improve)
 


How do I cope. Well, it doesn't stink here. There is very little traffic, few cars, and almost no commercial vehicles. There are no gulls pecking at bin bags. There are no bin bags. The air is clean. It is quiet and dark at night. There are 3 excellent pubs within walking distance. There is never any trouble in the 3 pubs. I almost never hear a siren. There are no chuggers. There is never any sick on the pavement. There is no rubbish strewn all over the place. There are no posters stuck up all over the place. Banksy (or his copycats) have not vandalised anywhere here. There is no other graffiti either. I have a garage. I have a driveway. I can park my car anywhere I like with no fear of traffic wardens. There are no yellow lines on the road. My neighbours talk to me. There is a field with a horse in it less than 25 yards from my front door. I have a woodpecker nest in a tree in my garden. I have loads of trees in my garden. I have the internet. I have 6000kbps internet. I have satellite TV. I have never got stuck in traffic here. There is a shop which sells pretty much everything. There is a butchers next door to the shop. There is a farm shop that sells fresh produce, at sensible prices. I am working with the patio doors open with plenty of the fresh air flooding in. I just heard the horse neigh.

Oh, and I can get in my car, or hop on a bus and get to the coast in no time at all.

Apart from that, I struggle.

That has got to be the best description of country life i've ever read.

apart from the horse bit, I hate the things.
 


Colossal Squid

Returning video tapes
Feb 11, 2010
4,906
Under the sea
I hate town bars now - I love small village pubs. Becuase I look like a ham-fisted in-bred whose been banging next doors donkey, I fit in a treat. I feel part of the fabric of the community.

Now I do sort of see where you are coming from here because despite this rant I am actually quite a fan of the quaint and rustic country pub BUT there are still plenty of quieter pubs in Brighton town that don't have to conform to the rowdy, sticky, crowded, smelly city bar template. In fact my local in Kemp Town is a fantastic little place that's as far away from a West Street Yates' as anything the country has to offer
 


Commander

Arrogant Prat
NSC Patron
Apr 28, 2004
13,562
London
Well I guess it's different strokes for different folks but I'm DEFINITELY a city boy.

Some of the things other people quote as negatives from the city I actually miss. I like seagulls and I like the hustle and bustle on the streets outside. The buses may be crowded but I'd still rather have them than NOTHING. And as for bad air, I live by the sea which has lovely FRESH air which the Victorians swore by. If I lived in downtown Croydon I'd see your point perhaps, but I dont think it's fair to moan about the quality of air in Brighton given how much open space there is.

At least one of the few channels I can get is BBC 1 so I can enjoy tonight's Apprentice. Suppose that's something

Brighton's not really a city though, is it? Well alright, it is, but you get my point. It's not exactly Hong Kong or somewhere
 




Commander

Arrogant Prat
NSC Patron
Apr 28, 2004
13,562
London
I hate town bars now - I love small village pubs. Becuase I look like a ham-fisted in-bred whose been banging next doors donkey, I fit in a treat. I feel part of the fabric of the community.

Now I do sort of see where you are coming from here because despite this rant I am actually quite a fan of the quaint and rustic country pub BUT there are still plenty of quieter pubs in Brighton town that don't have to conform to the rowdy, sticky, crowded, smelly city bar template. In fact my local in Kemp Town is a fantastic little place that's as far away from a West Street Yates' as anything the country has to offer

I love nice country pubs as well. But is it me, or is it getting harder and harder to find a really good one? You know, those ones that are just perfect to sit in on a Sunday afternoon and have shoulder of lamb and 12 pints of Guinness by a crackling log fire. More and more seem to be getting a bit chainy, or just not as nice as they used to be. Maybe I'm just getting old.
 


Superphil

Dismember
Jul 7, 2003
25,679
In a pile of football shirts
That has got to be the best description of country life i've ever read.

apart from the horse bit, I hate the things.

:blush:

We do occasionally hear the alpacas in the field just beyond the horses field, and the sheep. I don't like cows, but we do hear them too, but I do like cows when they are dead and cut into ribeye steaks, which I buy from the butchers.
 


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