[Help] Child mental health

[atomised]

Really going through it at the moment with my 8 year old stepson. A large part of it relates to a criminal matter I won't disclose on here. He has expressed suicidal thoughts and as a result was admitted last week to hospital for his own safety. Unfortunately 2 days later the child and adolescent mental health service decided discharging to the community was his best option. Home he came with a pocketful of calming exercises and some work to do with him.

Fast forward 3 days and my partner and I aren't sleeping because he is still expressing those thoughts and we have had a complete meltdown this evening. Much hitting and scratching himself and refusing to try his calming methods because they don't work.

Where to next. Hopefully we will start to get some more professional backing but for now it's a daily battle.

NSC is usually so good at advice so I figured I would put it out there.

 

[Weststander]

Really going through it at the moment with my 8 year old stepson. A large part of it relates to a criminal matter I won't disclose on here. He has expressed suicidal thoughts and as a result was admitted last week to hospital for his own safety. Unfortunately 2 days later the child and adolescent mental health service decided discharging to the community was his best option. Home he came with a pocketful of calming exercises and some work to do with him.

Fast forward 3 days and my partner and I aren't sleeping because he is still expressing those thoughts and we have had a complete meltdown this evening. Much hitting and scratching himself and refusing to try his calming methods because they don't work.

Where to next. Hopefully we will start to get some more professional backing but for now it's a daily battle.

NSC is usually so good at advice so I figured I would put it out there.

Very sorry to hear that, for you all.

Does his school and CAMHS know? From my recent experience, the moment “suicidal thoughts” are mentioned, the system worked remarkably fast and very well to potentially protect a young life.

 

[AmexRuislip]

Really going through it at the moment with my 8 year old stepson. A large part of it relates to a criminal matter I won't disclose on here. He has expressed suicidal thoughts and as a result was admitted last week to hospital for his own safety. Unfortunately 2 days later the child and adolescent mental health service decided discharging to the community was his best option. Home he came with a pocketful of calming exercises and some work to do with him.

Fast forward 3 days and my partner and I aren't sleeping because he is still expressing those thoughts and we have had a complete meltdown this evening. Much hitting and scratching himself and refusing to try his calming methods because they don't work.

Where to next. Hopefully we will start to get some more professional backing but for now it's a daily battle.

NSC is usually so good at advice so I figured I would put it out there.

I really do feel for yourself and your family.
If you are not getting anywhere with the local authorities, you need to keep pushing them for help.
Be open with them, tell them how its affecting all of you.
I've had similar with a family member, and from the start we were basically palmed off with drugs, which didn't really work.
After much badgering from me up here to the local authorities in East Sussex, I got somewhere, and now my relative is being cared for by professionals.
Anytime for a chat, just PM

 

[Poojah]

Wow, really sorry to hear that. It's not really on the same scale, but my niece of the same age has suffered from a range of sensory and anxiety based issues which were serious enough to pretty much grind her life to a halt. Leaving the house became a huge ordeal.

My sister's been taking her to a private psychotherapist for about six weeks now, and has already made significant progress (that even I've noticed from a distance). The lady she's been seeing has been open and up front enough to say that she isn't really qualified for one or two of specific issues, but knows the right specialist to refer her to which is now in progress.

I think it costs about £50 per session, but it's enabled everyone to really understand what's going through her mind and deal with it accordingly. Kids can be incredibly complex beasts but also often incredibly simplistic too - it's sometimes easy to overlook those simple things. In my neice's case it's been a real mix complex, deep seated issues and things which seem so obvious now it's hard to believe we all missed them.

I obviously don't know about the specifics of your stepson's situation so I can't really comment any further, other than to say may I wish you and your family all the best in coming through this.

 

[atomised]

Very sorry to hear that, for you all.

Does his school and CAMHS know? From my recent experience, the moment “suicidal thoughts” are mentioned, the system worked remarkably fast and very well to potentially protect a young life.

His school are well aware. CAMHS assessed him at the hospital and it was they who said he could be looked after at home. The CAMHS worker at the hospital pretty muchsaid because of his age he was unlikely to act on those thoughts. We have a temporary plan whilst waiting for a follow up call from CAMHS

 

[timbha]

Can’t offer any help other than to say how I feel for you, hope you and your other half can support each other, and to wish you good luck.

 

[LamieRobertson]

I have no ideas sorry....but Its my sincere hope is that all of you get help TOMORROW

 

[Weststander]

His school are well aware. CAMHS assessed him at the hospital and it was they who said he could be looked after at home. The CAMHS worker at the hospital pretty muchsaid because of his age he was unlikely to act on those thoughts. We have a temporary plan whilst waiting for a follow up call from CAMHS

Needless to say good luck. At least he has two parents looking out for him 24-7. Your angst is normal, an expert said on R2 not so long ago that “we (parents) are only ever as happy as our unhappiest child”.

On a small positive, at that young age there’s plenty of time and free resources to work with him, to make the lad a far happier person. It will be counsellors and hopefully child pschologists.

 

[Poojah]

Wow, really sorry to hear that. It's not really on the same scale, but my niece of the same age has suffered from a range of sensory and anxiety based issues which were serious enough to pretty much grind her life to a halt. Leaving the house became a huge ordeal.

My sister's been taking her to a private psychotherapist for about six weeks now, and has already made significant progress (that even I've noticed from a distance). The lady she's been seeing has been open and up front enough to say that she isn't really qualified for one or two of specific issues, but knows the right specialist to refer her to which is now in progress.

I think it costs about £50 per session, but it's enabled everyone to really understand what's going through her mind and deal with it accordingly. Kids can be incredibly complex beasts but also often incredibly simplistic too - it's sometimes easy to overlook those simple things. In my neice's case it's been a real mix complex, deep seated issues and things which seem so obvious now it's hard to believe we all missed them.

I obviously don't know about the specifics of your stepson's situation so I can't really comment any further, other than to say may I wish you and your family all the best in coming through this.

FYI, there are a few in the East Sussex area if it was something you might like to explore:

https://www.psychologytoday.com/gb/...east-sussex-county?sid=5f5fe007ab175&spec=325

 

[atomised]

Needless to say good luck. At least he has two parents looking out for him 24-7. Your angst is normal, an expert said on R2 not so long ago that “we (parents) are only ever as happy as our unhappiest child”.

On a small positive, at that young age there’s plenty of time and free resources to work with him, to make the lad a far happier person. It will be counsellors and hopefully child pschologists.

Thanks. Will be another day of countless phone calls. My positive side thinks his age gives him ample opportunity to bounce back. It hurts so much knowing a child that age can feel so hopeless.

 

[atomised]

FYI, there are a few in the East Sussex area if it was something you might like to explore:

https://www.psychologytoday.com/gb/...east-sussex-county?sid=5f5fe007ab175&spec=325

Thanks. Will look into that

 

[Doc Lynam]

Really going through it at the moment with my 8 year old stepson. A large part of it relates to a criminal matter I won't disclose on here. He has expressed suicidal thoughts and as a result was admitted last week to hospital for his own safety. Unfortunately 2 days later the child and adolescent mental health service decided discharging to the community was his best option. Home he came with a pocketful of calming exercises and some work to do with him.

Fast forward 3 days and my partner and I aren't sleeping because he is still expressing those thoughts and we have had a complete meltdown this evening. Much hitting and scratching himself and refusing to try his calming methods because they don't work.

Where to next. Hopefully we will start to get some more professional backing but for now it's a daily battle.

NSC is usually so good at advice so I figured I would put it out there.

Speak to your GP and see if you can get a referral for you child to be assessed and a if passed a plan and team should support you each with there own part to play. Mental health is very tough on everyone concerned but its great that you’re talking and reaching out next stop your GP.
https://www.nhs.uk/using-the-nhs/nh...-young-peoples-mental-health-services-cypmhs/

CAMHS is the service I think you’ll need.

You guys aren’t alone with this there are services designed to support you and if you don’t like the answers you are getting ask to be seen by someone else get a second opinion, change GP etc.

 

[Weststander]

Thanks. Will be another day of countless phone calls. My positive side thinks his age gives him ample opportunity to bounce back. It hurts so much knowing a child that age can feel so hopeless.

I found the school, hopefully you have a caring person there taking control, do the work for you in getting the CAMHS ball rolling.

 

[atomised]

Speak to your GP and see if you can get a referral for you child to be assessed and a if passed a plan and team should support you each with there own part to play. Mental health is very tough on everyone concerned but its great that you’re talking and reaching out next stop your GP.
https://www.nhs.uk/using-the-nhs/nh...-young-peoples-mental-health-services-cypmhs/

CAMHS is the service I think you’ll need.

You guys aren’t alone with this there are services designed to support you and if you don’t like the answers you are getting ask to be seen by someone else get a second opinion, change GP etc.

Been begging for a GP referral for a while CAMHS assessed him at the hospital and it's only because we pushed they have passed it to the community team. Hopefully we will finally get somewhere with that

 

[Harry Wilson's tackle]

Stay on it and stay strong. All my best wishes. HWT.

 

[Insel affe]

Good luck Automised, my Nephew went through something similar last year, heartbreaking when someone so young thinks taking your own life is an option. Best wishes to you and your family x

 

[Doc Lynam]

Been begging for a GP referral for a while CAMHS assessed him at the hospital and it's only because we pushed they have passed it to the community team. Hopefully we will finally get somewhere with that

Keep pushing, but also be aware that Covid has kicked some waiting times back. Work practises having to change, catching up with existing clients base and ever expanding one, but do explain your needs.

 

[atomised]

I found the school, hopefully you have a caring person there taking control, do the work for you in getting the CAMHS ball rolling.

We do now. The previous person very definitely worked against us but someone else has taken it on board now

 

[Originunknown]

Sorry to hear this. As a parent this must be an extremely difficult situation. Try to create more positive distractions and focuses for him, more positive outlets and uses for his energy and time.

 

[Insel affe]

Sorry to hear this. As a parent this must be an extremely difficult situation. Try to create more positive distractions and focuses for him, more positive outlets and uses for his energy and time.

Definitely keep him away from NSC then.