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Charging family for Xmas dinner







Bob'n'weave

Well-known member
Nov 18, 2016
1,972
Nr Lewes
Disclaimer: not read article, response being to thread title.

My ex proposed charging our kids £15 for Xmas dinner, starting the year after she'd given them the choice about whether they wanted to spend Xmas with me or her and they chose me. I shit you not. Oddly, they've never spent Xmas with her since she mooted the idea. They're all arriving today, 2 with boyfriends in tow; it's going to be messy.

Good luck with that one mate. Keep us posted. :thumbsup:
 


Postman Pat

Well-known member
Jul 24, 2007
6,973
Coldean
We used to have all the family around ours at Christmas, about 50 or so, three sittings etc...

My 6 aunties used to each pay £1 a week and that paid for everything including a barrel of beer, for Christmas and boxing day.

Now if we have our kids around we buy Turkey, veg etc... we ask them to bring some beef/gammon and what they want to drink.
 


wakeytom

New member
Apr 14, 2011
2,718
The Hacienda
The table is set, the champagne’s on ice and crackers sit by the plates.
All that remains is for the guests to arrive for Christmas lunch, where they will be welcomed with open arms.
As long as they have paid up in advance, that is.
This is the reality of Christmas Day festivities at the home of Leah Wright this year.
She has invited 12 people — all family — to celebrate with her and her partner, Andrew Fuller, at their comfortable home in South London.
Yet she has made it clear that guests can only attend if they pay her £60 per couple for the privilege.
And if you’re coming without a plus one?
Too bad.
Leah’s mother and sister are attending without partners and must still fork out £60 each.
Not only that, but Leah insists on having the money in advance — cash or a bank transfer directly into the couple’s account.
For providing the lunch, she has a budget of just over £400.
It’s a sum that will leave Leah with a profit from her guests’ contributions, and cover the cost of her own and Andrew’s Christmas lunch.
And her guests won’t even get a glass of wine for their £60 fee — they have been asked to bring a bottle with them.


This, absolute tosh, family traditional meal has gone out of the window.
In my grandparents day, we all used to go round (about 12 people), with each family chipping in with certain items of food and drink.
Too commercialised I'm afraid.

Exactly what we do, a while ago for family dinners we offered to take things to my parents and it has just come tradition - as a fat boy I get put in charge of puddings as I always seem to manage to crowd please with others bringing drink and cheese etc - my parents who host do all the cooking etc so supply the meal itself.

Works out well, no money changing hands and everyone is happy to chip in
 


Kellie

New member
Aug 11, 2014
66
I give [MENTION=29916]Kellie[/MENTION] some Christmas STUFFING and FESTIVE sausage for FREE

Not anymore you don't. Not after I caught you making a pigs in blanket with your sausage and one of my Mum's best back bacon rashers.
 




Shropshire Seagull

Well-known member
Nov 5, 2004
8,788
Telford
People who like to host for many are usually either show offs or want to be martyrs. The sort of people that do all the fun stuff like cooking, it is fun, delegate all the peeling and slicing to someone else and then when the shitty jobs like clearing and washing up are due, pour a large glass of something and flop onto a chair declaring "that's me, I'm not lifting another finger until New Year".

Would have to disagree with that - Mrs SS does all the prep & cooking and I happily do the clearing / washing up [cos I don't / can't cook] - its a team effort and each knows what there role is.
 


Shropshire Seagull

Well-known member
Nov 5, 2004
8,788
Telford
I've always felt a strange sense of privilege and extravagance at Christmas - I wouldn't consider myself particularly wealthy but I'm not skint either.

So when we fill our faces with food & drink and buy gifts for each other, I can't help but reflect and think of the many, many people who are unable to dip into such luxury, even for a special few days each year. I have always wanted to invite an under-privileged stranger to join my small family [Mrs + 2 grown up girls & partners] to make it a special time for them too. Whether that be a Syrian orphan, a Chernobyl child with a short life expectancy or a homeless teenager from the local area.

Has anyone else done such a thing as I don't really know how to go about it ....
 


Justice

Dangerous Idiot
Jun 21, 2012
20,677
Born In Shoreham
After reading the article she sounds like a ****ing nightmare to live with, the husband Is obviously embarrassed about the situation but hasn't the balls to stand up to his Mrs.
 




GoldWithFalmer

Seaweed! Seaweed!
Apr 24, 2011
12,687
SouthCoast
I've always felt a strange sense of privilege and extravagance at Christmas - I wouldn't consider myself particularly wealthy but I'm not skint either.

So when we fill our faces with food & drink and buy gifts for each other, I can't help but reflect and think of the many, many people who are unable to dip into such luxury, even for a special few days each year. I have always wanted to invite an under-privileged stranger to join my small family [Mrs + 2 grown up girls & partners] to make it a special time for them too. Whether that be a Syrian orphan, a Chernobyl child with a short life expectancy or a homeless teenager from the local area.

Has anyone else done such a thing as I don't really know how to go about it ....

If you cannot do that,perhaps you could assemble a hamper and take it to a homeless shelter....

Perhaps you could consider adoption agencies and maybe approach them...
 


fat old seagull

New member
Sep 8, 2005
5,239
Rural Ringmer
I would be so disappointed if any of my family sunk so low. We do things for each other (and others) without seeking reward. I can't get my head around that, as bad as the act is, the fact that they seem to think it's okay blows my mind.. feck off, said Tiny Tim!
 


Diablo

Well-known member
Sep 22, 2014
4,385
lewes
We have large gathering and most people chip in with sommething be it Drink,The Turkey or Gammon joint.

It does not seem very "Season of Gooodwill ish" to demand cash payment but each to their own.
 




Thunder Bolt

Silly old bat
I've always felt a strange sense of privilege and extravagance at Christmas - I wouldn't consider myself particularly wealthy but I'm not skint either.

So when we fill our faces with food & drink and buy gifts for each other, I can't help but reflect and think of the many, many people who are unable to dip into such luxury, even for a special few days each year. I have always wanted to invite an under-privileged stranger to join my small family [Mrs + 2 grown up girls & partners] to make it a special time for them too. Whether that be a Syrian orphan, a Chernobyl child with a short life expectancy or a homeless teenager from the local area.

Has anyone else done such a thing as I don't really know how to go about it ....

https://community.crisis.org.uk/christmas-2016/reserve-a-place
 


FatSuperman

Well-known member
Feb 25, 2016
2,922
So of the many, many people who are unable to dip into such luxury, even for a special few days each year. I have always wanted to invite an under-privileged stranger to join my small family [Mrs + 2 grown up girls & partners] to make it a special time for them too.
Has anyone else done such a thing as I don't really know how to go about it ....

Every year my mum would host us all (I've got 6 siblings), plus a few aunts etc, usually about twenty people. She'd also bring along someone from the village (Burwash) who didn't have anywhere to go that year. Initially a bit odd tbh but very quickly became an amazing thing to do. We tended to know these people though so not quite sure how you'd go about it with a stranger.
 


Da Man Clay

T'Blades
Dec 16, 2004
16,286
As the eldest son when my dear mum passed away and dad moved abroad it kinda fell to me and my other half to do it. Would never ask for a penny. My lot tend to end up spending a little more on gifts than I do. Got 7 this year as dad is back from Spain and my youngest brother is bringing his partner. Looking forward to it. Know how much it means to every one so that's more than enough payment for me. Just wish I was a slightly better cook!
 




The Clamp

Well-known member
NSC Patron
Jan 11, 2016
26,185
West is BEST
I think everyone bringing a dish/drink or whatever is the way to go. That way you get some input and not just someone else's idea of Christmas. Actually cooking a main course is not that expensive anyway once the meat is paid for. Spuds and veg cost **** all even in large quantities, what else is there? A few sauces and gravy. I reckon for a medium sized family, the main course should cost no more than £100 all in. If you can't treat your family to what is essentially a turbo charged Roast dinner, you're a tightarse who doesn't deserve to have such loyal family.
 


GoldWithFalmer

Seaweed! Seaweed!
Apr 24, 2011
12,687
SouthCoast
I think everyone bringing a dish/drink or whatever is the way to go. That way you get some input and not just someone else's idea of Christmas. Actually cooking a main course is not that expensive anyway once the meat is paid for. Spuds and veg cost **** all even in large quantities, what else is there? A few sauces and gravy. I reckon for a medium sized family, the main course should cost no more than £100 all in. If you can't treat your family to what is essentially a turbo charged Roast dinner, you're a tightarse who doesn't deserve to have such loyal family.

Thing is when there are birthdays and anniversaries at other hosting family members houses throughout the year it all gets paid back so to speak anyway,what with the summer BBQ's and so forth added in for good measure.
 


The Clamp

Well-known member
NSC Patron
Jan 11, 2016
26,185
West is BEST
Thing is when there are birthdays and anniversaries at other hosting family members houses throughout the year it all gets paid back so to speak anyway,what with the summer BBQ's and so forth added in for good measure.

Exactly. Totting up what one's family owes them per plate is crass, vulgar and shows zero class.

I personally hate being "hosted" so to be billed for the privilege would certainly get a "No" from me.

If one cannot afford to host a Christmas Lunch, fair enough, just don't host it.

I knew reasonable civilisation was over for good when I saw a row of modern wives sat at the back of the Remembrance Day service at my local church, nattering through the service, each one clutching a grande Starbucks takeaway cup.
 


GoldWithFalmer

Seaweed! Seaweed!
Apr 24, 2011
12,687
SouthCoast
Exactly. Totting up what one's family owes them per plate is crass, vulgar and shows zero class.

I personally hate being "hosted" so to be billed for the privilege would certainly get a "No" from me.

If one cannot afford to host a Christmas Lunch, fair enough, just don't host it.

Very much so.
Me too,personally i find it all a little (well a lot actually)odd....it matters not that it happens to be in the Daily Mail,for what it really highlights is the fact that it actually happens out there.
 




Springal

Well-known member
Feb 12, 2005
24,785
GOSBTS
All very odd. Only time I can remember money changing hands was contribution towards meat when my girlfriends mum hosted, which was fine.

Now it's all about bringing some food / drink. We're hosting Boxing Day and have sorted starter / main and just asked others to bring dessert & some nibbles for the evening.

And I'm in charge of beer when we go to my parents
 


The Clamp

Well-known member
NSC Patron
Jan 11, 2016
26,185
West is BEST
I've just seen there was more to the article, scrolling down I see Leah, the one in the top pic with the double chin and trotters smooshed into those shoes, insisted on Quiche as an option. Quiche? Get out.
 


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