Comrade Sam
Comrade Sam
Just keep on fighting. I have lost close friends to suicide and it leaves an unbearable hole that can never be filled. It's a f***ed up world that makes people want to just end it. But there's always something worth tomorrow!
[Albion] BHAFC saved my life
- Thread starter mrjon1976
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HangletonGull
Well-known member
- Apr 10, 2023
- 2,297
Brave post keep going
Vaughan Storm
Active member
Reading posts like this makes me sad but it's common. I heard a stat that 1 in 5 men feel suicidal at some point in their life so there's a very high chance that some of your friends or family have felt like this. My advice would be to work on yourself, identify what's good and bad in your life and try to eliminate as much of the bad as possible or make the bad things good. When I felt suicidal I did this and eventually got out of it somehow, if you put in enough effort, things will turn around. I must say though, your life won't change on its own. I posted earlier a quote from Steve Harvey: 'if you're in hell, why would you stop in hell?', whenever you're down, think about that, you will have some good or okay days even if they're rarer than they used to be, build on them.
Cotton Socks
Skint Supporter
- Feb 20, 2017
- 2,160
Sad to hear that you completely reached rock bottom. I'm really, really pleased that you're able to come back here & say that things are improving though. 
Slowly but surely the good days will outweigh the bad! You still have a lot of work to do on your opinion of yourself though! You're liked by people on here just for telling your story, you've probably helped others by showing that things can improve! Don't underestimate the positive effects you have on others!
Slowly but surely the good days will outweigh the bad! You still have a lot of work to do on your opinion of yourself though! You're liked by people on here just for telling your story, you've probably helped others by showing that things can improve! Don't underestimate the positive effects you have on others!
- Oct 20, 2022
- 6,942
Can I just add my tuppence worth too Mr Jon with regard to the therapeutic value of supporting our football club ( and feeling supported by them) as well as speaking out on NSC -:
As a few posters know, I reached rock bottom recently when in an isolation ward in hospital with Covid and later with post-Covid complications of heart, Lung and gastrointestinal disease - in complete transparency to NSC, more than once I phoned the Samaritans from hospital when in some very dark moments, I was feeling intensely alone and isolated.. I also posted on the MH thread and while I was physically unable to follow the advice given of eating well and going for walks, I was really touched by the kindness of all the NSCers that responded and some also sent messages which was incredibly touching.
Those dark feelings of despair still keep punching me in the gut every few days now when I struggle to chase healthcare providers as my physical health deteriorates daily while waiting for an op and with more and more concerning test results which has me mostly bedridden and alone at home (my family and friends all live in Brighton or London which doesn’t help) All that is pushing me at those low moments to wanting the pain and exhaustion just to be all over and feeling I literally can not carry on - And yet, supporting the Club and looking forward to next season has helped me keep going for weeks and weeks by both watching our matches from hospital beds and finally making it to the Man U match a few weeks ago. I was so ill by the time I got to the Amex that night from the effort of literally leaving my sick bed and traveling all day that the stewards had to help me out big time with wheelchairs etc and helping me get back home after the game - I later emailed the club to thank them and explaining how much it meant being there.
I’m sure I’m not the only one to have emailed the Club this type of thing over the years so I’m sure they know how much the Club can mean to some people, especially those who are acutely ill, either mentally or physically and I love the Club even more for helping me attend the match that night.
All that is by means of saying you are so not alone in needing and feeling very deeply that connection as a fan. I think there must be 1000s of football supporters with acute mental health struggles and everyone one of us ‘true’ fans value the therapeutic nature of supporting a team that we love whether having MH issues or not. And yes, having been accused on the Everton thread of having my feet so far up the @rse of RDZ my trainers were sticking out (
) like you I feel protective of ‘my‘ Club and it’s hard for me to resist coming vigorously to the defence of any of our players or manager/ executive staff or indeed any fans when they come under what I feel might be too much criticism or vitriolic scrutiny - they all mean so much to me but your words really express it so much better than I can.
Coming onto NSC and sharing what has been happening with you is a real positive step and it was met with a lot of support and love from an amazing number of fellow NSCers too which I hope has encouraged you.
Each time someone posts about their mental health struggles, I think even more what an important role the Forum has in providing a space where people feel safe to do that. (And thanks obviously to Bozza for all the hard work that goes into maintaining and running the site - without that, we wouldn’t even have a conversation or platform for people to unload)
I posted a link to Inside Matters on another thread today - you (or others ) may find it helpful to talk to a MH service that was specifically launched by the Premier League to help football players and supporters.
- help is always there in some capacity no matter how dark the tunnel gets - most of all, we all need to dig deep inside ourselves at those crisis moments and find the light that is inside each and every one of us which gives us the inner strength to live regardless of our physical and mental suffering.
Link on the Club website here
www.brightonandhovealbion.com
www.premierleague.com
As a few posters know, I reached rock bottom recently when in an isolation ward in hospital with Covid and later with post-Covid complications of heart, Lung and gastrointestinal disease - in complete transparency to NSC, more than once I phoned the Samaritans from hospital when in some very dark moments, I was feeling intensely alone and isolated.. I also posted on the MH thread and while I was physically unable to follow the advice given of eating well and going for walks, I was really touched by the kindness of all the NSCers that responded and some also sent messages which was incredibly touching.
Those dark feelings of despair still keep punching me in the gut every few days now when I struggle to chase healthcare providers as my physical health deteriorates daily while waiting for an op and with more and more concerning test results which has me mostly bedridden and alone at home (my family and friends all live in Brighton or London which doesn’t help) All that is pushing me at those low moments to wanting the pain and exhaustion just to be all over and feeling I literally can not carry on - And yet, supporting the Club and looking forward to next season has helped me keep going for weeks and weeks by both watching our matches from hospital beds and finally making it to the Man U match a few weeks ago. I was so ill by the time I got to the Amex that night from the effort of literally leaving my sick bed and traveling all day that the stewards had to help me out big time with wheelchairs etc and helping me get back home after the game - I later emailed the club to thank them and explaining how much it meant being there.
I’m sure I’m not the only one to have emailed the Club this type of thing over the years so I’m sure they know how much the Club can mean to some people, especially those who are acutely ill, either mentally or physically and I love the Club even more for helping me attend the match that night.
All that is by means of saying you are so not alone in needing and feeling very deeply that connection as a fan. I think there must be 1000s of football supporters with acute mental health struggles and everyone one of us ‘true’ fans value the therapeutic nature of supporting a team that we love whether having MH issues or not. And yes, having been accused on the Everton thread of having my feet so far up the @rse of RDZ my trainers were sticking out (
) like you I feel protective of ‘my‘ Club and it’s hard for me to resist coming vigorously to the defence of any of our players or manager/ executive staff or indeed any fans when they come under what I feel might be too much criticism or vitriolic scrutiny - they all mean so much to me but your words really express it so much better than I can.Coming onto NSC and sharing what has been happening with you is a real positive step and it was met with a lot of support and love from an amazing number of fellow NSCers too which I hope has encouraged you.
Each time someone posts about their mental health struggles, I think even more what an important role the Forum has in providing a space where people feel safe to do that. (And thanks obviously to Bozza for all the hard work that goes into maintaining and running the site - without that, we wouldn’t even have a conversation or platform for people to unload)
I posted a link to Inside Matters on another thread today - you (or others ) may find it helpful to talk to a MH service that was specifically launched by the Premier League to help football players and supporters.
- help is always there in some capacity no matter how dark the tunnel gets - most of all, we all need to dig deep inside ourselves at those crisis moments and find the light that is inside each and every one of us which gives us the inner strength to live regardless of our physical and mental suffering.
Link on the Club website here
Premier League launches Inside Matters mental wellbeing campaign
In 2020, the Premier League signed up to the 'Mentally Healthy Football Declaration', committing to make mental health a key priority at all levels of the game.
www.brightonandhovealbion.com
Physical & Mental Health Wellbeing Advice | Premier League
Keeping physically and mentally fit is important for positive wellbeing. For more information, visit the official website of the Premier League. #StayWell
www.premierleague.com
Last edited:
seagullwedgee
Well-known member
- Aug 9, 2005
- 3,070
Z, I don’t know how you found the strength to write that in your current position and condition, but it’s brilliant. You should be proud of that. And I’m sure many will be boosted by that.
Weststander
Well-known member
@mrjon1976 so glad you’re still here and were around for that special 6-0.
You need to learn to love yourself, you 100% can do that, it’ll change your life, your perspective of life for the better.
Don’t put everything on your shoulders. The events you describe with the US tour and money aspect, were 100% not your doing. Others can f*ck us up, especially family, Philip Larkin was correct. There are people even in this small nsc who I know for a fact who got through similar damage and are happy now.
I’d recommend counselling.
Your journey’s already started, you need to stick around for you and to witness the wonderful Albion future Tony Bloom has planned.
Take care.
You need to learn to love yourself, you 100% can do that, it’ll change your life, your perspective of life for the better.
Don’t put everything on your shoulders. The events you describe with the US tour and money aspect, were 100% not your doing. Others can f*ck us up, especially family, Philip Larkin was correct. There are people even in this small nsc who I know for a fact who got through similar damage and are happy now.
I’d recommend counselling.
Your journey’s already started, you need to stick around for you and to witness the wonderful Albion future Tony Bloom has planned.
Take care.
nicko31
Well-known member
I think in writing this post you've demonstrated how strong your are, keep fighting
UTA
UTA
Thanks for posting @mrjon1976.
I would add that asking one's self whether it is worthwhile carrying on, rather than being an alarm bell, can be quite instructive. On numerous occasions I have thought 'what's the f***ing point?' when finances, physical health, personal relationships and my general prospects are looking grim. Always there emerge numerous reasons that are a f***ing point, if I can put it like that. And every time I go through the cycle, I emerge stronger. Now, at my age, I am more concerned about being snatched off the planet against my wishes by disease (or more likely a tragic accident triggered by my carelessness) than pondering whether there is a point to it all.
Among the many reasons that have been a f***ing point to me, like you, The Albion has been right up there. Going on my own for the first time during the Gillingham years was the start of it. The shit football was never a problem, and back then the gritty determination of the club to survive inspired me to ensure I did the same. It wasn't the most important thing in my life, but it was important, and rather like the way Nabakov described art, in the context of the great sceme of things in a world that can be very shitty, following the Albion was like a '"cleaner room on a quieter floor". A gift that always gives, no matter the score.
With very best wishes. And... commiserations for living in a somewhat shittier part of Kent than Faversham
I would add that asking one's self whether it is worthwhile carrying on, rather than being an alarm bell, can be quite instructive. On numerous occasions I have thought 'what's the f***ing point?' when finances, physical health, personal relationships and my general prospects are looking grim. Always there emerge numerous reasons that are a f***ing point, if I can put it like that. And every time I go through the cycle, I emerge stronger. Now, at my age, I am more concerned about being snatched off the planet against my wishes by disease (or more likely a tragic accident triggered by my carelessness) than pondering whether there is a point to it all.
Among the many reasons that have been a f***ing point to me, like you, The Albion has been right up there. Going on my own for the first time during the Gillingham years was the start of it. The shit football was never a problem, and back then the gritty determination of the club to survive inspired me to ensure I did the same. It wasn't the most important thing in my life, but it was important, and rather like the way Nabakov described art, in the context of the great sceme of things in a world that can be very shitty, following the Albion was like a '"cleaner room on a quieter floor". A gift that always gives, no matter the score.
With very best wishes. And... commiserations for living in a somewhat shittier part of Kent than Faversham
Jackthelad
Well-known member
- Mar 31, 2010
- 1,075
It would be good to have a pinned thread on mental health support on The Big Board where people will actually see it and use it 24 hours a day; where anyone on the forum can encourage or offer help if needed or people could let out their frustrations or want advice.
I've been on other forums and there have been quite a few guys that I found out committed suicide. Most suffer in silence, it's a huge problem.
Also don't believe the lie about most people being c**ts, they aren't! I used to think in this nihilist manner and it's bs, there are people that will want to help and are strangers who you've never met. There are plenty that will even offer to meet up with you at games. Albion fans tend to be good at that, we are a community club.
I've been on other forums and there have been quite a few guys that I found out committed suicide. Most suffer in silence, it's a huge problem.
Also don't believe the lie about most people being c**ts, they aren't! I used to think in this nihilist manner and it's bs, there are people that will want to help and are strangers who you've never met. There are plenty that will even offer to meet up with you at games. Albion fans tend to be good at that, we are a community club.
Lenny Rider
Well-known member
- Sep 15, 2010
- 6,021
An amazing post, which strikes a chord with many, myself included.
Please remember Jon, you are not alone, and amongst the NSC family there is no end of number of people prepared to help you and equally as important listen.
For every gobshite on NSC there’s at least 50 good uns
Thank for sharing, and take care
Harty
Please remember Jon, you are not alone, and amongst the NSC family there is no end of number of people prepared to help you and equally as important listen.
For every gobshite on NSC there’s at least 50 good uns
Thank for sharing, and take care
Harty
Tom Hark Preston Park
Will Post For Cash
- Jul 6, 2003
- 72,377
Sorry, but...
'Please don't put your life in the hands
Of a rock and roll band'
Or a football team.
And I mean that genuinely.
Wishing OP all good things. Thanks for posting
'Please don't put your life in the hands
Of a rock and roll band'
Or a football team.
And I mean that genuinely.
Wishing OP all good things. Thanks for posting
The OP post has really affected me and I'm really sorry that things are feeling that way for you, and what you experienced with your dad. Please keep going. I am also slighlty worried you've not been on NSC since the day you posted this. I hope you are ok @mrjon1976!
jakarta
Well-known member
As Winston Churchill, who wrestled with his 'Black Dog' depression said 'when you are going through Hell, keep going'...