An open letter to the bloke that stole my pint

[Tom Hark Preston Park]

And im writing this still stuck in bloody Bennets field

You were still stuck in Bennett's field at 07:18 this morning?! No wonder you're a bit pee'd off!

 

[BrianWade4]

Go for a dirty pint. Urine wouldn't put me off

 

[portslade seagull]

If it was Guinness I think ( SIMMO SAYS ) took it as the pumps broke down in the Northstand

 

[piersa]

Dear head

You utter utter

I queued up for hours for that ing thing only for you to pinch it whilst my guard was down and going for a wizz

what sort of wit are you,im sure during the week you rob pensioners of their war medals and shag your sister after for a bit of celebration.

I bet you wear tight denim shorts you mong,the ones with the turn ups like a hipster Jimmy Saville,your Rolf Harris beard simply rounds of your utter prickknobishness.

I really hope you zip up your ,expose flesh and fall into a vat of chilli with 15 million on the scoville scale

I will now be wizzing in every pint i buy.........steal at your peril.....you have been warned!

Very, Very tasty. Helped to wash down a delightful pie. Thanks again.

 

[Phat Baz 68]

you are off the hook

i doubt they make denim shorts in your size

you'll be surprised

 

[Tom Hark Preston Park]

i am getting the feeling some of you jokesters are really not getting the seriousness of this blatant theft/beer mugging

Enough of your glass-half-empty attitude already. Oh.

 

[South Stand Rebel]

..Beer today, gone tomorrow?...

 

[AmexRuislip]

 

[pastafarian]

Having bought a lovely refreshing pint yesterday I had the terrible misfortune of knocking it over ,whilst looking down at my spillage with tears springing to my eyes my heart was suddenly gladden as I turned back to the shelf to see a sudden replacement , it must have been those wonderful catering staff seeing my utter hurt and despair must have replaced my spillage with a fresh one, boy did it taste good and cheers to warm human spirit, from a happy tear stained slightly greying gent.

a little birdy has just told me you didnt even bother turning up for the game Mr Season Ticket Holder Sten.......i have ruled you out as a suspect.

 

[Tim Over Whelmed]

Or, of course, an unattended pint may have been cleared up by a very diligent cleaner?

 

[sten]

a little birdy has just told me you didnt even bother turning up for the game Mr Season Ticket Holder Sten.......i have ruled you out as a suspect.

And which little birdy told you that

 

[Change at Barnham]

I always have difficulty in accepting that people steal other peoples drinks. I would suspect that it most often happens because of a mix-up and people picking up the wrong drink by accident. I find it surprising that anyone can get so angry over a drink. Life's too short to get so wound up.

 

[Tom Hark Preston Park]

I'd like to propose a toast to [MENTION=21401]pastafarian[/MENTION] (as soon as he's gone to the bogs, obviously)

 

[Hyperion]

I am still utterly lost at the "I queued up for hours" statement.

Bizarre. I very much doubt you did queue up for hours.

I don't think you ever purchased a pint and this is some kinda smart card discount scam.

 

[fat old seagull]

Dear head

You utter utter

I queued up for hours for that ing thing only for you to pinch it whilst my guard was down and going for a wizz

what sort of wit are you,im sure during the week you rob pensioners of their war medals and shag your sister after for a bit of celebration.

I bet you wear tight denim shorts you mong,the ones with the turn ups like a hipster Jimmy Saville,your Rolf Harris beard simply rounds of your utter prickknobishness.

I really hope you zip up your ,expose flesh and fall into a vat of chilli with 15 million on the scoville scale

I will now be wizzing in every pint i buy.........steal at your peril.....you have been warned!

Well to be honest, it tasted like you already in that one !

 

[Thunder Bolt]

Yes i did

And im writing this still stuck in bloody Bennets field.......what is your point.


(suspect no.3 emerges)

How did you get into Bennets field? It's fenced off because Mr Bennett won't let us use it.

 

[Worried Man Blues]

Have they started the Harveys in quart glasses yet? I realise one of these getting purloined would be twice as bad.