[Help] A Wee Issue...

[jonnyrovers]

Ate asparagus at lunch.

Completely forgot.

Went to the loo.

Pungent piddle, mild confusion, moment of clarity as I remember, followed by total confusion as to how the heck it happens.

Can also be experienced with strong coffee (smells like rice krispies), beetroot (looks like Ribena), Berroca (orange syrup).

This is what it has come to. I've completed Netflix & Prime. The international break was boring as hell. I can't bear The News.

Anyone got any more I can try?

 

[AmexRuislip]

[MENTION=1200]Harry Wilson's tackle[/MENTION] is your go to for all things asparagus

 

[Peteinblack]

Way, way, too much information. You do realise that over-sharing is a thing?

 

[Poojah]

Had the pleasure of wiping my little girl’s bum the other day. Imagine my horror as I found myself confronted with a bowlful of loose, lime green stool, floating gently amidst a slimy pool of diarrhoea, equally psychedelic in colour.

I’m not lying when I say genuine panic ensued as my mind raced to work out what kind of terrible illness might be afflicting my poor daughter, until I remembered that supper the night before had consisted of lashings of my son’s bright blue birthday cake.

I’m not quite sure of the chemical reasons that blue food colouring maketh green poo, but there you go. I guess you learn something every day.

Panic over.

 

[Jim Van Winkle]

Had the pleasure of wiping my little girl’s bum the other day. Imagine my horror as I found myself confronted with a bowlful of loose, lime green stools, floating gently amidst a slimy pool of diarrhoea, equally psychedelic in colour.

I’m not lying when I say genuine panic ensued as my mind raced to work out what kind of terrible illness may be afflicting my poor daughter, until I remembered that supper the night before had consisted of lashings of my son’s bright blue birthday cake.

I’m not quite sure of the chemical reasons that blue food colouring maketh green poo, but there you go. I guess you learn something every day.

Panic over.

Remember the colour wheel. Sounds like she mixed in some yellow.

 

[darkwolf666]

Had the pleasure of wiping my little girl’s bum the other day. Imagine my horror as I found myself confronted with a bowlful of loose, lime green stools, floating gently amidst a slimy pool of diarrhoea, equally psychedelic in colour.

I’m not lying when I say genuine panic ensued as my mind raced to work out what kind of terrible illness may be afflicting my poor daughter, until I remembered that supper the night before had consisted of lashings of my son’s bright blue birthday cake.

I’m not quite sure of the chemical reasons that blue food colouring maketh green poo, but there you go. I guess you learn something every day.

Panic over.

Now we are on little one's bums!

Changed my little one's nappy and found what I thought was a tape worm, split second of panic, then remembered he eats his towel after a bath and was poohing out threads from that...

Oh the joys of caring for a child with pica!

 

[Poojah]

Now we are on little one's bums!

Changed my little one's nappy and found what I thought was a tape worm, split second of panic, then remembered he eats his towel after a bath and was poohing out threads from that...

Oh the joys of caring for a child with pica!

I don’t know very much about pica, and I’m really not sure about laughing, but that did trigger a genuine LOL.

 

[Mr Bridger]

If we’re talking arses then we need natures toothbrush, or the projectile of choice for the casual during the 80’s.

 

[WATFORD zero]

Now we are on little one's bums!

Changed my little one's nappy and found what I thought was a tape worm, split second of panic, then remembered he eats his towel after a bath and was poohing out threads from that...

Oh the joys of caring for a child with pica!

Once had a cat that had eaten the string from a Sunday joint and ran round the kitchen with that hanging out it's arse. No real stories about the kids that I can remember

 

[Guinness Boy]

If you eat asparagus in November you deserve everything you get you Philistine!

 

[Palacefinder General]

What about Johnny Eck, lived to the age of 80 with no bladder, genitalia or arse. How is that even possible? To quote his Wikipedia page “Apart from having no lower half, he was otherwise completely healthy”

 

[Is it PotG?]

Once had a cat that had eaten the string from a Sunday joint and ran round the kitchen with that hanging out its arse.

Wow, that's GOOD.

Ever considered stand-up?

 

[METALMICKY]

Had the pleasure of wiping my little girl’s bum the other day. Imagine my horror as I found myself confronted with a bowlful of loose, lime green stool, floating gently amidst a slimy pool of diarrhoea, equally psychedelic in colour.

I’m not lying when I say genuine panic ensued as my mind raced to work out what kind of terrible illness might be afflicting my poor daughter, until I remembered that supper the night before had consisted of lashings of my son’s bright blue birthday cake.

I’m not quite sure of the chemical reasons that blue food colouring maketh green poo, but there you go. I guess you learn something every day.

Panic over.

The same colourant used in bubble gum flavour ice cream will produce a slimy green stool.

 

[Knocky's Nose]

I can eat a bowl of Sugar Puffs, then around three hours later my pee smells exactly like Sugar Puffs. I have zero idea why...

I no longer eat Sugar Puffs.

 

[jonnyrovers]

If you eat asparagus in November you deserve everything you get you Philistine!

What if I live in Morrocco

 

[zefarelly]

Once had a cat that had eaten the string from a Sunday joint and ran round the kitchen with that hanging out it's arse. No real stories about the kids that I can remember

Over 20 years ago visiting my brother on a farm in Kent, there was a dog , had eaten some crap our of a bag of rubbish apparently, kept licking its arse . . .. someone spotted something sticking out . . . . A bit of plastic . . . Someone got the dog and tugeed, and tugged . . . .and tugged . . . . A complete carrier bag! The dog didn't half pull some funny faces

First day we got our dog from the rescue place he laid an egg in the back garden, resplendant with a shiny blue button in it. Flouro tennis ball fluff ued to be a common sight too

 

[WATFORD zero]

Over 20 years ago visiting my brother on a farm in Kent, there was a dog , had eaten some crap our of a bag of rubbish apparently, kept licking its arse . . .. someone spotted something sticking out . . . . A bit of plastic . . . Someone got the dog and tugeed, and tugged . . . .and tugged . . . . A complete carrier bag! The dog didn't half pull some funny faces

First day we got our dog from the rescue place he laid an egg in the back garden, resplendant with a shiny blue button in it. Flouro tennis ball fluff ued to be a common sight too

In my experience, after many years of trying to raise kids and pets, it is the major difference. The pets output is slightly less predictable

*edit* And, I forgot, pets are quieter and cost less

 

[Dick Swiveller]

Had the pleasure of wiping my little girl’s bum the other day. Imagine my horror as I found myself confronted with a bowlful of loose, lime green stool, floating gently amidst a slimy pool of diarrhoea, equally psychedelic in colour.

I’m not lying when I say genuine panic ensued as my mind raced to work out what kind of terrible illness might be afflicting my poor daughter, until I remembered that supper the night before had consisted of lashings of my son’s bright blue birthday cake.

I’m not quite sure of the chemical reasons that blue food colouring maketh green poo, but there you go. I guess you learn something every day.

Panic over.

I had that in Florida. They did Monsters Inc Ice Cream at McDonalds and the Blue dye did the same to me.

 

[Arthritic Toe]

What about Johnny Eck, lived to the age of 80 with no bladder, genitalia or arse. How is that even possible? To quote his Wikipedia page “Apart from having no lower half, he was otherwise completely healthy”

And not a lot of people know that he is the Eck referred to in the term "Flippin Eck".

 

[Guinness Boy]

What if I live in Morrocco

Morrocco Road, Shoreham-by-sea?