[Misc] A bit of good news - albeit personal. The moral - never give up.

[Eric the meek]

My son, now 23, has suffered from depression and anxiety for 5-6 years. It has been quite a journey, with some dark days. But he is now off the Sertraline - it was his decision, as he thought, quite correctly, that it wasn't actually helping him.

This week, he went for a trial for a job (his first job ever), and has kind of fallen into it. The trial turned into a full shift, and when he got home, he had a huge smile on his face, something that I had forgotten he was capable of. Today, he has completed another shift. I know he has every intention of sticking at it. He has discovered motivation. He is motivated to keep his new employer happy, and understands the value it will be on his CV. It is still early days of course, and there will be setbacks. I am used to them.

I just thought I would share this with you all. Partly to share the utter relief after years of worry. But also to offer a message of hope to those of you who suffer from mental health issues. Things do change, and sometimes they do get better. We, his parents, never gave up on him, despite being advised to throw him out by another family member.

Tonight, I think....I think.....he is going to be OK. My task is to reacquaint myself with, or perhaps get to know, the articulate, intelligent, astute young man that I didn't know was in there.

Thank you all for taking the time to read this.

 

[hart's shirt]

He has discovered motivation. He is motivated to keep his new employer happy, and understands the value it will be on his CV.

Attitude affects altitude.

The good thing is you don't need qualifications, experience or a so-called perfect past to turn up on time with a positive approach.

Very happy to hear that your son's enjoying his work and coming home with a smile.

Regardless of the occupation, a sense of purpose and achievement helps so much with self-esteem.

I wish him well for the future.

 

[Superphil]

Fantastic to hear this, everything crossed here for continued success.

 

[Eric the meek]

Attitude affects altitude.

The good thing is you don't need qualifications, experience or a so-called perfect past to turn up on time with a positive approach.

Very happy to hear that your son's enjoying his work and coming home with a smile.

Regardless of the occupation, a sense of purpose and achievement helps so much with self-esteem.

I wish him well for the future.

Thank you for your wise words!

I will try and incorporate them into conversations with my son. I'm still learning how and when, and for how long, to do it before it becomes a lecture!

 

[drew]

Mental health is an absolute shit storm. For those suffering from it and those close enough who have to try and help them navigate through it. My best mate from childhood, ages 5 to about 20, committed suicide in Feb this year. Unexpected. Hadn't seen him for 40 odd years and was due to return to this country for a meet up and was looking forward to it. A week later my daughter had issues and her school counsellor told me she had reported being suicidal including how she was planning to do it. The very worst year of my life and we're still working through. In a better place now but you always live with the fear that when they exit the door that could be the last time you see them.

Sounds like your son, as with my daughter, is on the right track and I wish you both well.

 

[Herr Tubthumper]

Obviously excellent news regarding your son, but also well done to you for your continued belief in him

 

[Bansko Seagull]

Thanks for sharing your experience. It’s tough for everyone and well done for hanging on in there and continuing to support your son. I hope others also gain hope and support from this.

 

[chickens]

My son, now 23, has suffered from depression and anxiety for 5-6 years. It has been quite a journey, with some dark days. But he is now off the Sertraline - it was his decision, as he thought, quite correctly, that it wasn't actually helping him.

This week, he went for a trial for a job (his first job ever), and has kind of fallen into it. The trial turned into a full shift, and when he got home, he had a huge smile on his face, something that I had forgotten he was capable of. Today, he has completed another shift. I know he has every intention of sticking at it. He has discovered motivation. He is motivated to keep his new employer happy, and understands the value it will be on his CV. It is still early days of course, and there will be setbacks. I am used to them.

I just thought I would share this with you all. Partly to share the utter relief after years of worry. But also to offer a message of hope to those of you who suffer from mental health issues. Things do change, and sometimes they do get better. We, his parents, never gave up on him, despite being advised to throw him out by another family member.

Tonight, I think....I think.....he is going to be OK. My task is to reacquaint myself with, or perhaps get to know, the articulate, intelligent, astute young man that I didn't know was in there.

Thank you all for taking the time to read this.

First, really glad that your son appears to be taking positive steps. The background psychological worry that is lifted when you feel you don’t have to worry to the same degree about someone you love and are concerned for is huge.

Second, thank you for sharing this, it does feel a bit as if the whole world is on fire atm, between Putin, tech bro’s throwing their weight around, strikes, and a political class absolutely divorced from reality. It’s genuinely uplifting to hear about victories, regardless of scale.

Hope your son’s progress is sustained and that direction of travel continues.

 

[Eric the meek]

Mental health is an absolute shit storm. For those suffering from it and those close enough who have to try and help them navigate through it. My best mate from childhood, ages 5 to about 20, committed suicide in Feb this year. Unexpected. Hadn't seen him for 40 odd years and was due to return to this country for a meet up and was looking forward to it. A week later my daughter had issues and her school counsellor told me she had reported being suicidal including how she was planning to do it. The very worst year of my life and we're still working through. In a better place now but you always live with the fear that when they exit the door that could be the last time you see them.

Sounds like your son, as with my daughter, is on the right track and I wish you both well.

Thank you for your comment, and I'm so sorry for the loss of your best mate.

It sounds like your daughter is on the path to recovery. I can relate to your fear, but our fear of suicide has been replaced with wondering what will happen next. Our experience with our son has been one long process of learning. What we have discovered is the mental health services within the NHS are fragmented and don't really talk to each other. So when we have used one service, had an unsatisfactory result, and want to try another, we have to start again. They are all under pressure due to demand of course, and so seek to get patients off their books asap. You can understand it from their perspective, in that they need to focus on those patients who want to be helped, i.e. where they are most likely to get a result. But this doesn't help people, especially young people like my son, who are depressed and don't turn up for appointments and don't let them know. Signing him off because he failed to make an appointment is just another rejection to him.

However, one service stood out head and shoulders above the rest.

Brighton

The Spear Programme is transforming employment by supporting unemployed young people facing different challenges and barriers getting into work or education. We equip them with confidence, motivation and the vital skills they need to succeed in long-term employment.

resurgo.org.uk

They run courses from St. Peters church.

The best of luck to you and your daughter. Perhaps it is just time, changing circumstances, talking, and a safe and stable home environment that are the best therapy.

 

[Greg Bobkin]

Fantastic. What a brilliant story and well done to your son for cracking on and getting that smile back on his face.

Good luck to him - and you - in the future

 

[DavidinSouthampton]

My son, now 23, has suffered from depression and anxiety for 5-6 years. It has been quite a journey, with some dark days. But he is now off the Sertraline - it was his decision, as he thought, quite correctly, that it wasn't actually helping him.

This week, he went for a trial for a job (his first job ever), and has kind of fallen into it. The trial turned into a full shift, and when he got home, he had a huge smile on his face, something that I had forgotten he was capable of. Today, he has completed another shift. I know he has every intention of sticking at it. He has discovered motivation. He is motivated to keep his new employer happy, and understands the value it will be on his CV. It is still early days of course, and there will be setbacks. I am used to them.

I just thought I would share this with you all. Partly to share the utter relief after years of worry. But also to offer a message of hope to those of you who suffer from mental health issues. Things do change, and sometimes they do get better. We, his parents, never gave up on him, despite being advised to throw him out by another family member.

Tonight, I think....I think.....he is going to be OK. My task is to reacquaint myself with, or perhaps get to know, the articulate, intelligent, astute young man that I didn't know was in there.

Thank you all for taking the time to read this.

We’ve had a similar (but lesser) experience with our daughter this week. Off work 6 months with mental health issues, now diagnosed with ADHD, she’s a doctor, a qualified surgeon but now final stages of training as a GP, she has found a workplace that is supportive and now seems to be brimming with confidence.

fingers crossed, but she has also bitten the bullet and sorted it all out herself for the most part. Sorted out the best thing to do and gone for it.

 

[Normal Rob]

Great news.

 

[Norman Potting]

I identify with many of the comments here. Hats off to those who have "opened up" and every best wish for continuing progress.

 

[jakarta]

We’ve had a similar (but lesser) experience with our daughter this week. Off work 6 months with mental health issues, now diagnosed with ADHD, she’s a doctor, a qualified surgeon but now final stages of training as a GP, she has found a workplace that is supportive and now seems to be brimming with confidence.

fingers crossed, but she has also bitten the bullet and sorted it all out herself for the most part. Sorted out the best thing to do and gone for it.

Sadly the Medical profession seems to have issues. I did a presentation years ago to a Day Meeting of the Faculty of Occupational Medicine about what I do for a living (Occupational Hygiene).

The subsequent presentation (from a Doctor) was about was about the amount of self medication, addiction, self harm and in some cases suicide amongst Medical Professionals.

 

[timbha]

A great story to wake up to today. Well done!!

 

[Eric the meek]

Thank you to everyone for your replies, thumbs up and good wishes. They are very much appreciated.

 

[Reddleman]

Thanks for sharing. Lovely to read such nice news rather than the usual doom and gloom.

 

[5Ways Gull]

You sound like brilliant parents

 

[Eric the meek]

You sound like brilliant parents

Thank you for the sentiment but I haven't told you about the failures!

As you would expect, the last five years have seen a mixture of successes and failures. We've made mistakes, but we are learning all the time.

Onwards and upwards!

 

[Thunder Bolt]

Thank you for the sentiment but I haven't told you about the failures!

As you would expect, the last five years have seen a mixture of successes and failures. We've made mistakes, but we are learning all the time.

Onwards and upwards!

Every parent feels they've failed at times but the reality is, nobody is perfect, and we learn from failure. Like you said, never give up. It's so good your son has found a purpose, which in itself, gives him confidence.
All the best.