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In the not unlikely event that Prezza will actually say Yes, we all know that's just the signal for a lot of things to happen. Not least being some entirely predictable opinions - well, we've all had three years to get ready for the moment - from some of NSC's finest. Salivate as you...

Tony Blair will be attracting more criticism than ever before over the Butler Report - his latest, ill-advised wheeze to pull the wool over the eyes of the British public. But the feeling persists that none of the criticism will actually register on Teflon Tone. One section of the public has...

For giving it all up and... (your suggestions welcome)

Some group therapy for Henmaphobes. A chance to share openly what it is so many of us don't like about Timmy. I have to concede that of course he's actually a pretty good tennis player overall, but it's impossible to feel anything other than a pathological loathing for the guy. No single...

Or, maybe, "You're crap Tim?" Anyone know what would happen if someone in the crowd shouted that out? You can do it in footie, but what happens at Wimbledon? Do you get beaten to death with rolled-up Daily Mails? Anyone know? Henhaters watching Timmie serve could of course try adapting the...

Stop Press - New case confirmed (see para 5) Spin doctors advising Deputy Prime Minister John Prescott today admitted he’s been suffering for eighteen months from an extremely rare brain disorder. This compounds the dyslexia which for years has been at the root of his legendary difficulties...

Spin doctors advising Deputy Prime Minister John Prescott today admitted he’s been suffering for eighteen months from an extremely rare brain disorder. This compounds the dyslexia which for years has been at the root of his legendary difficulties with expressing himself. Termed Falmaphobia...

As everyone knows, all media organisations keep obituaries at the ready, to wheel out whenever a famous figure dies. The death of Reagan prompts the thought that, judging by her appearance today, his number one UK groupie and mourner in chief cannot herself have too long to go among mere...

... for the Tories. David Brent, Andy King, Tommy Mooney and now this latest humiliation. Turnip Town Torment - will it never end?

They really don’t give up, do they! This is from the Whingedon Town official site’s betting news column. “ Odds to win the Second Division outright have caused a stir within the gambling circle and Swindon Town have been set at 9/1 to claim the title. The outcome of Andy King’s close season...

The co-ordinated singing of 'Bubbles' today by Hammers fans was amazing, and really atmospheric. But Sussex by the Sea will be awesome tomorrow. As long as everyone remembers to start a bit lower and sing a bit slower than usual. See below!

To the chorus of Y Viva Espana Oh we're back in Division One again But give us our Falmer! We're fed up with singing in the rain So give us our Falmer! 62,000 people made it plain Just one site in Brighton! And if Prescott chucks it down the drain We'll vote Labour no more!

As long as we top the magic 22,374, does it really matter if we don't sell out? After all, what else would reasonable people expect from a club that's had to turn away 75% of its natural fan base, week in, week out, for seven... whole... years? The main point will still have been made: to...

Try this. Especially if you’re an official terrace song-starter. In your head - or out loud - pick the highest note you can sing comfortably. That's your GO, as in “GO-ing up and we'll win the Cup” That same GO note, but an octave lower - is the starting note for your Doo-Doos. It really...

This board has become disfigured by absurdly self-pitying whingers, ALL of whom will get in. Think how it felt with a minute to go on Thursday... I'm sure Swindon supporters would happily swap places.

Our club song is fantastic. Everyone loves it. But it's the only song we ALWAYS get wrong. Why? Let's get it right for tomorrow night - and crucially for the Millennium Stadium. How to sing it properly? Three changes needed:- 1 You've got to START LOWER DOWN - otherwise you get those TWO...

From their website today - (apologies if already posted here) See http://www.swindontownfc.premiumtv.co.uk/page/NewsDetail/0,,10341~525194,00.html " Unbelievably there are still just over 450 tickets left for tomorrow’s Sunday showdown with Brighton & Hove Albion in the first leg of the Play...

Separate items, but they're showing Prescott playing footie with kids - AND the Swindon "Eden Project or New Stadium - Prescott to decide" issue. On now! Watch it and comment / use tomorrow?

Scored after 3 mins

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