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Our forwards fire more blanks than the Territorial Army

Ok Mr Fawkes, it's gonna be an explosive season though I can feel it

Hg You watch it all go up in smoke Guy Fawkes on the 7th August, no need to wait till November

That's not me talking, that'll be Peter Beagrie I'll be saying, " oh dear here we go again 1-0 down at home after looking promising for the first 20 minutes but then ran out of ideas, (then with 20 minutes to go) we don't look like scoring now if we played till midnight"

Can hear Peter Begrie's half sky analyst now, " Brightons tempo is far too slow, ok they've had 80% possession but when it comes to the final 3rd there's no cutting edge and a poor final pass, if Forest are patient in the 2nd half can see them nicking it 1-0"

Norwich fans were right after all, this man would send a room full of insomniacs on coke to sleep

Wer'e ****ing brilliant We're ****ing brilliant Goals galore exciting brand of football Brilliant high tempo play, strong squad that will be pushing for automatic promotion, got a crate of champagne on ice

Normal service is resumed, Albion 0-0 scoreline Looking at the starting 11 isn't far from who's gonna start against Forest, very underwhelmed Just ordered a crate of Doom for the opening weekend

Slovenia & Lithuania again in the group, yawn, plus the might of Malta, apart from the Scotland game the FA will have to come up with cheapish tickets to even half fill up WEMBLEY Slovakia will be tough currently topping their group above Spain, but at the end of the day all the hype & build up...

Just downloaded the classical version on iTunes, absolutely loving it,

Just got back from walking dog past training ground, no sky cameras no sing of Zamora either, all quiet on the western front today I'm afraid

It's also turned a few heads and make people sit up and notice the clubs ambitions for the future to bring in decent young players, with the excellent training facilities in place hopefully this is the beginning of what the club are aiming for, with Harper on board it can only attract other...

I'm bi polar so not sure which camp I'm in, on Monday I put £50 on being relegated the next day I woke up I put £50 on promotion

THE BRIGHTON GALACTICOS Bong Hemed Hambo Harper I won't be drinking any DOOM for a while

What's the opposite to a Pint of Doom? Just put £50 on us now for automatic promotion

Another Roland Bergkamp And another pint of Doom please

The first couple? I've written off the first 5 games Forest 0-0 D Fulham 0-1 L Huddersfield 0-1 L Blackburn 1-1 D Ipswich 0-2 L 2 points from 5 games at the September international break and into the bottom 3 Can't see many more points with current squad from playing against those 5...

You Dirty Birdy

A bit like Kathy Bates kidnapping Paul Sheldon to write another Misery Chastain novel

Yeah not really thought that one through, if I'm allowed a second day off I'm gonna go with the Kelly Brooke option after seeing that pic