As I was walking past I saw Delia howling "Lets be 'avin you!" at a coach load of ukelele players.
A George Formby lookalike took offence when Ms Smith offered him one of her homemade chicken balti pies.
Banjo the police dog got a whiff of Delia's crust and bit a fat steward. 42 coppers waded in...
He was a test tube baby, produced from the sperm of Nobby Stiles and the ova of Marcia Williams, then implanted in the womb of Barbara Windsor who was then granted immunity from Sid James.