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I started going into pubs at 13. Watneys mild in the Cricketers, Portslade.

If he genuinely thinks he's good enough for a test place he should have signalled his intent by piling up runs for Surrey instead of lining his pockets in St Lucia and then sprawling on a beach. Utter cock!

His scoring record is not too shabby for a short arse. But he's still a foot taller than Clunger. Could do worse ..... and we have.

Give him 3 games and if we aint got 9 points then bring in Steve "Arbuckle" Evans.

Colunga was absolute sh!te. Showed about as much interest as a vegan in a Dewhurst shop.

Cant believe i paid to watch that.

My lady friend and I will be at the Dripping Pan this afternoon.

Lord Lucan is a prime example.

Humble apologies. Is your husband called "Lightning". Could have been very very frightening.

He was screaming.

Roman Anatolyevich Pavlyuchenko Could do a job - if sober......

Radiators Tripadvisor

McCavity is the better prospect.

Stephen Hawking is technically gifted.....

Scrap National Insurance. Return of National Service with free Uni Tuition fees for those completing 2 years service. Cycle ban on A-Roads.

Excellent.

Scorchio!

No one's come up with a song yet.

Yeh - Dream Team!