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[Misc] Joke du Jour



Eeyore

Munching grass in Queen's Park
NSC Patron
Apr 5, 2014
27,646
My dear friend and work colleague has told me he has just done a 'sample' for his bowel cancer testing kit.

He asked if he should send it first class or second class.

I told him to send it turd class.
 






hart's shirt

Well-known member
Jul 8, 2003
11,476
Kitbag in Dubai
Harry_3rdClass.jpg
 


ConfusedGloryHunter

He/him/his/that muppet
NSC Patron
Jul 6, 2011
2,559
You would think something as serious and time sensitive as bowel cancer testing would have been better handled by having your poor friend attend a clinic for this.

The NHS is really in trouble isn't it?
 






Man of Harveys

Well-known member
Jul 9, 2003
19,130
Brighton, UK
When I did it they stressed - and who can blame them! - that they only require a very small amount. Hardly a (William) turds worth.
 


Dick Swiveller

Well-known member
Sep 9, 2011
9,803
Results were back in a week for me using the Freepost provided so I would have thought that would render any benefits of paying for your own postage null and void. Although do the NHS get charged for for Freepost if the envelope isn't used? If not then I suppose he is doing his part for saving the NHS money.

It does have to be said though that this is a very important precautionary scan so if he is going to use his own postage method, he should use an actual class of postage and not a weak pun as he needs it to arrive for his own peace of mind.
 


DavidinSouthampton

Well-known member
NSC Patron
Jan 3, 2012
17,612
You would think something as serious and time sensitive as bowel cancer testing would have been better handled by having your poor friend attend a clinic for this.

The NHS is really in trouble isn't it?
Oh no it isn’t!!!!!

having done this several times Mrs DiS and I are both very happy with it.
it‘s not intrusive in the bottom area, and we like to talk of it as Pooh Sticks, thereby effortlessly transporting us from our dotage (well not quite there yet) to our childhood!
 






Dick Swiveller

Well-known member
Sep 9, 2011
9,803
Oh no it isn’t!!!!!

having done this several times Mrs DiS and I are both very happy with it.
it‘s not intrusive in the bottom area, and we like to talk of it as Pooh Sticks, thereby effortlessly transporting us from our dotage (well not quite there yet) to our childhood!
Please tell me you posted them back in the envelope provided and didn't take them to Ashdown Forest to drop in a river.
 


Happy Exile

Well-known member
NSC Patron
Apr 19, 2018
2,317
I'm concerned that your friend had the kit but it didn't come with clear instructions. Also that they provided the sample before identifying how to return it. I'm no doctor but I imagine there may be some time-sensitivity to the way it's done. This might be crazy, but I'm starting to question whether anything you describe actually happened?
 






Insel affe

HellBilly
Feb 23, 2009
24,957
Brighton factually.....
My dear friend and work colleague has told me he has just done a 'sample' for his bowel cancer testing kit.

He asked if he should send it first class or second class.

I told him to send it turd class.
I would have told him it's treated the same a summons letter, Hand deliver only.
 


Brovion

In my defence, I was left unsupervised.
NSC Patron
Jul 6, 2003
20,153
There is no such postal service as Turd Class. One could argue that the entire postal service is a privatised disgrace and is 'shit', but there is no specific turd class service.

The OP's advice is badly flawed. One might even say it is 'shit'
 




Jack Straw

I look nothing like him!
Jul 7, 2003
7,230
Brighton. NOT KEMPTOWN!
My dear friend and work colleague has told me he has just done a 'sample' for his bowel cancer testing kit.

He asked if he should send it first class or second class.

I told him to send it turd class.
So which one did he choose?
 






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