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Your Valentines Day



S

Starry

Captain Of The Crew
Oct 10, 2004
6,733
The Large One said:
f*** Valentine's Day. Just an excuse for the greetings card industry to con gullible people out of money. f*** 'em.

I love my missus every day, anyway. I don't need some wet behind the ears card writer to tell her that.
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i made my own card. whipped it up in paint at about half eleven last night.
 




Beach Hut

Beach Hut

Brighton Bhuna Boy
Jul 5, 2003
72,220
Living In a Box
pasty said:
Beachy, Beachy. You didn't fall for that old chestnut did you.:nono:
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Yep, however just had a very pleasant lunch in Nia at Shoreham so now in her good books again
 


M

Mrs Coach

aka Jesus H. Woman
Jul 21, 2006
2,270
Lurking somewhere in East Sussex
If you want a great Valentines evening, follow this advice from one who knows the psycho workings of the female mind. Get the dinner and washing up out of the way as quickly as possible, bath the kids (or the dog if you dont have kids - or yourself, if you smell whiffy from the day's work) and get the kids to bed on the promise of a fiver if they stay in bed for the rest of the night.

Turn down the lights, shut the tv off and and put 'Liberian Girl' by Michael Jackson quietly on the stereo and beckon your women towards you seductively with the lure of a cadbury's wispa bar, with an eyebrow raise that would put the Rock to shame. Using 'Patrick Swayze' style knee sways (as in dirty dancing, or roadhouse) as you hold her in your arms hum quietly to the song, then when it finished, take her hand and head towards the bedroom (if it's got a lock on it, or the bathroom if not!)

Idiot-proof! Mrs Coach five star guarantee! That song (which I used to think was called 'Librarian Girl' in my youth!) was made to hypnotise women with seductive harmonies! Heheheheh.
 










M

Mrs Coach

aka Jesus H. Woman
Jul 21, 2006
2,270
Lurking somewhere in East Sussex
Mrs Coach said:
Turn down the lights, shut the tv off and and put 'Liberian Girl' by Michael Jackson quietly on the stereo and beckon your women towards you seductively with the lure of a cadbury's wispa bar, with an eyebrow raise that would put the Rock to shame. Using 'Patrick Swayze' style knee sways (as in dirty dancing, or roadhouse) as you hold her in your arms hum quietly to the song, then when it finished, take her hand and head towards the bedroom (if it's got a lock on it, or the bathroom if not!)
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The Wookiee said:
Did you bury the beef bayonet ?
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Please note the subtle differences between the male and female mind! :laugh:
 


Beach Hut

Beach Hut

Brighton Bhuna Boy
Jul 5, 2003
72,220
Living In a Box
Mrs Coach said:
If you want a great Valentines evening, follow this advice from one who knows the psycho workings of the female mind. Get the dinner and washing up out of the way as quickly as possible, bath the kids (or the dog if you dont have kids - or yourself, if you smell whiffy from the day's work) and get the kids to bed on the promise of a fiver if they stay in bed for the rest of the night.

Turn down the lights, shut the tv off and and put 'Liberian Girl' by Michael Jackson quietly on the stereo and beckon your women towards you seductively with the lure of a cadbury's wispa bar, with an eyebrow raise that would put the Rock to shame. Using 'Patrick Swayze' style knee sways (as in dirty dancing, or roadhouse) as you hold her in your arms hum quietly to the song, then when it finished, take her hand and head towards the bedroom (if it's got a lock on it, or the bathroom if not!)

Idiot-proof! Mrs Coach five star guarantee! That song (which I used to think was called 'Librarian Girl' in my youth!) was made to hypnotise women with seductive harmonies! Heheheheh.
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OK I've got the CD ready and the Wispa Bar so what time shall I call round ??????
 








Beach Hut

Beach Hut

Brighton Bhuna Boy
Jul 5, 2003
72,220
Living In a Box
Mrs Coach said:
And unless you've got some fetish for a lobster handed girl?........

Lol!
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Explain - what does a lobster handed girl do then ?
 












The Wookiee

The Wookiee

Back From The Dead
Nov 10, 2003
15,286
Worthing
Mrs Coach said:
Please note the subtle differences between the male and female mind! :laugh:
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Did you read my post about what I am doing tonight ?

Gave flowers and card this morning.

I am off for a five course meal this evening with an overnight stay here:

http://www.stanhillcourthotel.co.uk/

She knows nothing about it.
I have packed her overnight bag and will pick her up from work as normal and drive straight to the hotel !!
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C

csider

New member
Dec 11, 2006
4,497
Hove
got a card from an ex who stayed over week or so back, she hid it and called me yesterday to say where it was. nice jesture, only problem is she lives in france....for now!!

Probably get a hooker round later.
 








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