What is it that you like/love about your girlfriend/wife????

[patchamalbion]

her FLANGE

 

[patchamalbion]

Who do you think you are - Tiger Woods ? [/QUOTE
A couple was on their honeymoon, laying in bed, about ready to consummate their marriage, when the new bride says to the husband, "I have a confession to make, I'm not a virgin."

The husband replies, "That's no big thing in this day and age."

The wife continues, "Yeah, I've been with one other guy." "Oh yeah? Who was the guy?"

"Tiger Woods."

"Tiger Woods the golfer?"

"Yeah."

"Well, he's rich, famous and handsome. I can see why you went to bed with him."

The husband and wife then make passionate love. When they get done, the husband gets up and walks to the telephone.

"What are you doing?" says the wife. The husband says, "I'm hungry. I was going to call room service and get some food."

"Tiger wouldn't do that. "

"Oh yeah? What would Tiger do?"

"He'd come back to bed and do it a second time."

The husband puts down the phone and goes back to bed to make love with his wife a second time. When they finish, he gets up and goes over to the phone.

"What are you doing?" she says. The husband says, "I'm still hungry so I was going to get room service to get some food."

"Tiger wouldn't do that."

"Oh yeah? What would Tiger do?"

"He'd come back to bed and do it one more time." The guy slams down the phone and goes back to bed and makes love to his wife one more time.

When they finish he's tired and beat. He drags himself over to the phone and starts to dial.

The wife asks, "Are you calling room service?"

"No! I'm calling Tiger Woods to find out what's par for this hole!"

 

[dahdevon]

everything....luckily she is my best friend.

 

[Set of Tracksuits]

Absence does make the heart grow fonder

... and the wrist grow stronger

 

[¤DãŃn¥ §êãGüLL¤]

She lets me stick matches in her shit

 

[El Presidente]

Who do you think you are - Tiger Woods ?

Crumbs.......does he like watching midget porn too?

 

[El Presidente]

She lets me stick matches in her shit

It beats having to buy her a birthday cake I guess Danny.

 

[SirDouglasLoft]

She goes like a pornstar...

Well this was my ex girlfriend anyway.

 

[mejonaNO12 aka riskit]

She makes me laugh like a drain, we can go to the pub together and talk bollocks for hours, and she's the mother of my child. There are others, but those 3 will do

That's well gay.

 

[User removed 4]

She goes like a pornstar...

Well this was my ex girlfriend anyway.

and you obviously didnt ?? is that why she's your ex ?

 

[Mackenzie]

She makes nice cakes and she doesn't moan all the time (especially between about midnight and seven in the morning).....

 

[John Bumlick]

her hairless, perfectly puckered arsehole.

 

[Taybha]

her hairless, perfectly puckered arsehole.

no no you have misread the thread, its not her description of her fella its your fav thing about her .

 

[Return of the Rev]

send me to coventry

She is a right filthy whore between the sheets

not arf!

 

[hoopy]

She makes nice cakes and she doesn't moan all the time (especially between about midnight and seven in the morning).....

really?my girlfriend moans fairly loudly between midnight and 7am

she earns 3 times my salary and is funny and looks amazing... i'm punching well above my weight

 

[Freddie Goodwin.]

She does all the Xmas shopping!

 

[MikeySmall]

That's well gay.

Why exactly? Im guessing you like being with someone who is dull as shit, doesn't like going out and is a mute. Idiot.

 

[John Bumlick]

no no you have misread the thread, its not her description of her fella its your fav thing about her .

her 'fella'? what is this? a f***ing episode of Eastenders?