What's this? Is there no-one on NSC for whom their evening menu of choice is:-
(1) A self-destructing, collapsible 'pie' containing mechanically recovered abbatoir sweepings in an evil, glutinous gravy , or
(2) A stale, bleached roll tasting of cardboard, inadequately sheltering a nauseous 'frankfurter' sausage flavoured with pigshit, or
(3) A grease-packed 'burger' containing 4% 'meat products', and 96% bonemeal, cereal, saturated fats and salt?
No-one?
But I thought that those fragrant catering vans at Withdean had 'menus' designed around the carefully-researched tastes of a cross-section of 21st century football supporters.
Maybe not. Maybe NSC-ers are a just lot of simpering nancy boys, fully justifying Brighton's legendary reputation.
But I do hear there will be a Pret a Manger and Sushi bars at Falmer....
Wouldn't touch one with a barge poll, but the burgers at Withdean on Saturday looked shocking.
A very strange colour.
There nothing more apetising than the site of a mixture of raw, half cooked and well cooked burgers cooking on the same platter. I'm sorry - that just isn't food. Not fit for consumption in this human I'm afraid.
I'm extremely fussy about what I eat.
Beyond pre-prepared salads and things like ketchup I rarely eat anything out of a packet.
But, the standards are shocking. I laughed at the industrial vat of vinegar on the table next to the van. Or the metal teaspoons in a cup of brown water that I suspect was trying to act as a kind of cleansing agent.
I've already had this conversation with Gilliver's Travels, I would gladly pay 3 quid for a good sandwich at the game.
This ISN'T the fault of the club, but I think it could be improved. The standards seemed to have dropped recently.
Bring on Falmer, I'll look forward to my Pret BLT, but you'll have to prise my flask off me.