What are your best office/workplace comedy gold moments?

[Muhammed - I’m hard - Bruce Lee]

im a service engineer, once after completing a repair on an appliance in a customers house, i put it on test to prove the repair (normally takes about 25 minutes).
i noticed a framed photo on the front room wall of jocky wilson.
to pass the time, i started chatting to the customer about darts....did he play? was he a fan? etc...etc.

after about 5 minutes of me waffling on he said..."mate...why dya keep goin on about darts?"
"well" i said "youve got a photo of jocky wilson on your wall"


you could've heard a pin drop (and it was the longest 15 minutes of my life) when he replied....."jockey wilson?.......thats my late wife"

 

[Psychobilly freakout]

im a service engineer, once after completing a repair on an appliance in a customers house, i put it on test to prove the repair (normally takes about 25 minutes).
i noticed a framed photo on the front room wall of jocky wilson.
to pass the time, i started chatting to the customer about darts....did he play? was he a fan? etc...etc.

after about 5 minutes of me waffling on he said..."mate...why dya keep goin on about darts?"
"well" i said "youve got a photo of jocky wilson on your wall"


you could've heard a pin drop (and it was the longest 15 minutes of my life) when he replied....."jockey wilson?.......thats my late wife"

thats gonna keep me chucklin away for hours...cheers

 

[repomanse25]

sent an apprentice to a local hardware shop with 10 quid to get some 20mm holes,he came back with a empty screw box and a reciept for £7.99!!! the old boy in the shop tucked us right up!

 

[Bry Nylon]

Got called out to a chimney fire at a semi-detatched barn conversion on a Sunday evening a few years back.

Officer-in-Charge and one of the crew went into the house to assess situation and empty out hearth etc. Meanwhile 2 other members of the of the crew pitched a ladder to the roof and climbed along the ridge tiles to the chimney stack, with a hose, and waited for the order to spray a cooling jet down the chinmey.

I was operating the pump at the back of the appliance. After a few minutes I heard the order over the radio for the crew on the roof to start spraying some water down the chinmey. After a minute the order came to increase water as nothing was happening inside. After another minute a further order to increase pressure again as still no sign of water...

It was at this point the couple from the adjoining property burst out of their front door in a right flap. I thought "f***! The fire has broken through to next door!" But no... they'd been quite happily watching Heartbeat, totally oblivious to the two morons on the roof, until a stream of high pressure water came bollocking down their chimney, put their fire out turned their front room into an instant sauna.... Ooops...

 

[Muhammed - I’m hard - Bruce Lee]

Got called out to a chimney fire at a semi-detatched barn conversion on a Sunday evening a few years back.

Officer-in-Charge and one of the crew went into the house to assess situation and empty out hearth etc. Meanwhile 2 other members of the of the crew pitched a ladder to the roof and climbed along the ridge tiles to the chimney stack, with a hose, and waited for the order to spray a cooling jet down the chinmey.

I was operating the pump at the back of the appliance. After a few minutes I heard the order over the radio for the crew on the roof to start spraying some water down the chinmey. After a minute the order came to increase water as nothing was happening inside. After another minute a further order to increase pressure again as still no sign of water...

It was at this point the couple from the adjoining property burst out of their front door in a right flap. I thought "f***! The fire has broken through to next door!" But no... they'd been quite happily watching Heartbeat, totally oblivious to the two morons on the roof, until a stream of high pressure water came bollocking down their chimney, put their fire out turned their front room into an instant sauna.... Ooops...

 

[Bry Nylon]

Was talking with my mate Neil, a local farmer, the other day.

He was telling me about the time a woman in the neighbouring village telephoned him and asked if he could dig a large hole in her paddock with his JCB. Her beloved and elderly horse wasn't expected to last much longer and she wanted a horse-sized grave dug, in anticipation of the vet deciding he could do no more.

The morning after the hole had been dug the woman telephoned Neil and asked if could come back and fill in the hole.

"Oh dear," said Neil. "I am sorry. I guess there was nothing the vet could do."
"No, the vet hasn't been yet," she replied. "The horse fell down the hole in the middle of the night and broke his neck."