What animal would you most like to be?

[¤DãŃn¥ §êãGüLL¤]

I'd go for a duck. Not just cos it would be sick being able to walk, swim AND fly but think of the lifestyle.

Rape, orgies, necrophilia, homosexuality and ultra-violence... all in a day's work for your common drake.

What about you punks?

 

[Tricky Dicky]

I'd go for a duck. Not just cos it would be sick being able to walk, swim AND fly but think of the lifestyle.

Rape, orgies, necrophilia, homosexuality and ultra-violence... all in a day's work for your common drake.

What about you punks?

... and very nice with a fruity piquant sauce. I reckon cats have it best, they can go pretty much anywhere and don't have to do very much.

 

[¤DãŃn¥ §êãGüLL¤]

You wouldn't wanna eat me, I have crotch rot.

 

[Mellotron]

Yeah I'd be a cat. Do whatever you want, when you want, and still get waited on hand and foot.

 

[¤DãŃn¥ §êãGüLL¤]

Not very macho though.

I'd like to be a ladybird, they mate for something crazy like 20 hours.

 

[The Antikythera Mechanism]

Not very macho though.

I'd like to be a ladybird, they mate for something crazy like 20 hours.

As you seem obsessed with reproductive and defecatory equipment, surely you would want to be a dog. That way you get to lick your own arse & balls

 

[¤DãŃn¥ §êãGüLL¤]

I wouldn't wanna lick my arse knowing woss been in it.

 

[pasty]

Definite cat. All they do is eat, sleep, shit and shag.

 

[Titanic]

I think being a dolpin would be quite good fun... or a Hawksbill Turtle - they are fantastic!

 

[Uncle Spielberg]

A White Tiger

 

[hart's shirt]

A fox in the box.

 

[Jimmy Grimble]

An uber fly.

 

[Zesh Rehman]

Sabre Tooth Tiger

 

[Jahooli]

A seagull of course...same benefits as a duck but being harder with more shagging and being able to target-squirt buckets of noxious shit on Selhurst.

 

[Trigger]

A Cat, how lazy, and cool.

 

[Tricky Dicky]

Sabre Tooth Tiger

so, you want to have been extinct for several hundred years ??

 

[NMH]

I'd go for a duck. Not just cos it would be sick being able to walk, swim AND fly but think of the lifestyle.

Rape, orgies, necrophilia, homosexuality and ultra-violence... all in a day's work for your common drake.

What about you punks?

You would eventually mate for life, while occasionally having your missus gang-raped by single males, occasionally to death. Then (if she lived through it) you'd be raising kids that you are clueless to know who's they actually are.
Shot at and eaten by humans, like me, who would find you delicious (there's a first!)

Cat - only hunts for fun because it's fed and revered, free rent, sleep all day and whenever you like, sunbathe, shag but don't raise the kids - and sometimes gets to eat duck.

 

[¤DãŃn¥ §êãGüLL¤]

You would eventually mate for life, while occasionally having your missus gang-raped by single males, occasionally to death. Then (if she lived through it) you'd be raising kids that you are clueless to know who's they actually are.
Shot at and eaten by humans, like me, who would find you delicious (there's a first!)

Sorry to go all David Attenborough on yo' ass but ducks (or Mallards anyway) do not pair for life, nor do they help with raising of young.

Plus I'd live in Falmer Pond away from all those nasty murdering, chanting hoolies............oh

 

[withdeanwombat]

Surely you would want to be a dog. That way you get to lick your own balls

Only if you've kept that little jar from the vets.