Vegan advice, please

[Trufflehound]

Vegans are best served char-grilled with a red wine reduction sauce and a julienne of vegetables. Hope that helps.

I suggest a pork pie each as a starter.

 

[zefarelly]

a very good freind of mine met a lovely lady, who was vegetarian, and less than three months before she was a vegan, less than 5 years later theyre still blissfully happy together and she is now a confirmed carnivore, bloody good work I say.

there may be hope for them yet.

 

[Billy the Fish]

and she is now a confirmed carnivore, bloody good work I say.

Unless she doesn't eat any veg at all, she is technically an omnivore

 

[glasfryn]

VEGAN= great
GREEN PARTY= great but will they ever get in
ANTI-FALMER=MUST BE FROM ANOTHER PLANET.

go for a then give it to them both barrels,then say and go screaming up the albion.

 

[Rusco]

My advice would be ......

Vegetarians coming to dinner? Simply serve them a nice bit of steak or veal. Since they're always going on about how tofu, Quorn, meat substitute. etc., 'tastes exactly like the real thing', they won't know the difference.

Invited by vegetarians for dinner? Point out that since you'd no doubt be made aware of their special dietary requirements, tell them about yours, and ask for a nice rare steak.

 

[Easy 10]

a very good freind of mine met a lovely lady, who was vegetarian, and less than three months before she was a vegan, less than 5 years later theyre still blissfully happy together and she is now a confirmed carnivore, bloody good work I say.

there may be hope for them yet.

Bet I know what meat she's started eating then.

*snigger*

 

[Marc]

Bet I know what meat she's started eating then.

*snigger*

*snort snort*

 

[Kylies Stunt Arse]

*snort snort*

Only if it goes up her nose.


This is your chance to kill two birds with one stone. Correct the treehuggers about Falmer and ensure you never get invited back, ridding you and your other half of such pain in the arse "friends".

Oh, and take a couple of rashers of bacon and leave them behind their radiator in the shitter. They'll stink nicely in a couple of hours.

 

[Lady Bracknell]

I remember having a vegan for dinner once - well not literally, since there's not enough meat on them to feed a rabbit. Anyway, if being a vegan wasn't enough of a challenge, the miserable fucker waited till the grub was served and then told me that he didn't eat vegetables either.

 

[Hampden Park]

I remember having a vegan for dinner once - well not literally, since there's not enough meat on them to feed a rabbit. Anyway, if being a vegan wasn't enough of a challenge, the miserable fucker waited till the grub was served and then told me that he didn't eat vegetables either.

kin hell Roz i didnt realise you f***ing swore

what did he have to eat by the way?

 

[Eggmundo]

I remember having a vegan for dinner once - well not literally, since there's not enough meat on them to feed a rabbit. Anyway, if being a vegan wasn't enough of a challenge, the miserable fucker waited till the grub was served and then told me that he didn't eat vegetables either.

Wow, what is left?

Sweets?

 

[Easy 10]

kin hell Roz i didnt realise you f***ing swore

Thats De VECCHI'S fault, that is.

 

[nobody's dupe]

Early in the pre-dinner conversation, tell them that you had a vegetarian Christmas. When they are looking all pleased with you, tell them that you stuffed the turkey with sprouts. If you're not shown the door straight away, I'll guarantee you will not get another invitation to dinner.

 

[REDLAND]

Veggies Rule

FACT !!

 

[HampshireSeagulls]

Vegans? Make sure you have leather shoes, belt, jacket, hell, even underpants if you can get them in time. Spray yourself with something that smells of Yak musk, and make sure you bring up animal laboratories at some point. Like how we plan to install a branch of Huntingdon Life Sciences under the main stand at Falmer.

Then beat them to death with the soggy end of a roadkill badger.

Could you not arrange for a chinese meal for four to be delivered while you were there, explaining that whilst nut roast is ecologically sound, it's like eating your way through the bottom of a fcuking parrot's cage?

 

[Ned]

If they start on you about the impact on the environment you should take them to task about the amount of green house gasses they produce from their backsides. It is a well known fact that vegetarians and vegans produce more gaseous emitions than their omnivorous counterparts. As evidence of this point to how global warming has massively increased as more people have converted to vegetarianism. If they then change tack and go on about this being due to the rise in automobiles point out that the average household creates ten times the carbondioxide per annum than the most gas gusling vehicle.

 

[The Large One]

Guys, what can I say? Meat-eating stars the lot of you.

Sadly, it won't buy me out of going to the emaciated bores' house, but I will have a good time sniggering under my breath as I eat the most nutritious part of the meal - the packaging.

 

[The Large One]

Well, despite all your wise words, I actually went, and reasonably enjoyed myself, although, as Fourteenth Eye will testify, I did make a necessary stop in the Evening Star first.

Not once did we mention the F-word, and there house remain free of charred remains and ageing kippers in their wardrobe. I did learn one thing. Did you klnow Keith Taylor, the 'convenor' (that's leader to you) of the Green Party used to be a long-distance lorry driver with his own haulage company? Blimey, how the worm has turned. Not only is he a tree hugger, he's a born-again tree hugger.