Tossers in the office

[Bluejuice]

The Daily-Mail reading bigot sitting opposite me today is driving me f***ing nuts. He's just turned the radio off (from bland and inoffensive Radio 2) in order that we have to listen to his incessant Tory ramblings instead. I don't want to hear his voice but he seems to love it.

He went on for about an hour earlier about how this country needs Thatcher back in power. I nearly choked on my tea. Now he's belittling Guardian readers and raving about Elvis.

f*** OFF OFFICE TWAT

The worst part is he was retired but the company got him out of retirement to do his old job because they couldn't be bothered to train anyone new up.

Very tempted to go home sick, or just throw a brick in his stupid face

 

[Stinky Kat]

do both

 

[REDLAND]

eMail your post to him

 

[Schrödinger's Toad]

Sounds like a top man.

 

[D'Angelo Saxon]

Very tempted to go home sick, or just throw a brick in his stupid face

Take the brick home, and be sick in his face.

 

[Cheeky Monkey]

The Nine to Five. We were not put on this planet to spend the majority of our waking hours (commuting time included) in abject misery for 40 years until retirement. Even if you love your job it all becomes one tedious routine after a few years of the alarm clock going off, whether you're a porn star or a civil servant. My mates on the dole have a decent enough standard of living, are never short of dosh for a serious weekend in publand, could work but choose not to and seem very content with their lot. Where did I go wrong?

 

[3gulls]

Sounds like a great guy to me! Buy the man a pint after work.

 

[Biscuit]

Get a sharp tool and cut his tongue widthwise.

 

[Hampden Park]

roll up his newspaper and shove it up his arse

 

[The Large One]

Just remind him that Thatcher solely responsible for having destroyed entire communities, ways of life and encouraged civil unrest and civil disobedience and rioting (haven't had any full-blown riots under this government), Guardian readers have a vastly superior intellect (albeit lacking an aptitude for spelling), and that the Tories are a f***ing joke party - as is he.

Alternatively, just headbutt the c unt around the office for a couple of hours.

 

[The Large One]

Where is your office, by the way? Perhaps we could form an orderly queue to stamp on his face. That would be truly marvellous scenes.

 

[tedebear]

Totally agree with Cheeky Monkey we spend more time with idiotic work colleagues than the ones we choose to spend time with....

My employees are on the whole excellent - except one - daft, annoying, stupid and usually does explicitly the opposite of what I ask them to do.... why - because they think they know better than me!!

I'm currently looking for a new vocation where I'm my own boss.... I've tried playing the lottery but that hasn't worked...so I'm hatching a plan!!

Fell sorry for you Bluejuice - throw your monitor at him - I've seen it done before - its missed its intended target but on imploding put the fear of god into everyone from then on!!

 

[Dave the OAP]

whatcha looking to do Tede..

No smutty answers please

 

[tedebear]

all manner of things I can do Dave - its just trying to make a business out of it - loads of things I do (wedding cakes, dressmaking, piano teaching) are all ok for a hobby - but need a decent business to replace my Mon - Fri job!!

 

[Dave the OAP]

ooohhh. I may take you up on the piano teaching. That is something i have always wanted to do, and it will help me in my singing

 

[Hannibal smith]

I now work from home for the following reasons;

1. Mrs Loud (opposite) : Is louder than a jumbo jet taking off. Try concentrating with her shouting all day. God help her husband, he must be deaf.

2. Mr Whinge (next to me). Moans all day. The coffee dosen't taste nice, the water isn't right, This isn't my chair it feels wrong, Isn't the NHS in a bad state these days, I haven't got enough time to do my work. WELL IF YOU STOPPED F**KING MOANING YOU WOULD HAVE ENOUGH TIME TO WRITE WAR AND PEACE.

I swear if he worked in a strip joint the tits would be too small or the bear too warm.

3. Mr Ancedote. A typical conversation

''Here, Nik, you'll never guess what?
''What''
'Well, I went to the shop in the high street, the one in the centre, not the one just off it. Anyway, I buy my paper and the shop assistant says ' That's 48p please' and I say 'Shouldn't it be '50p' and he says ' We are selling papers with 2 pence off today' I tell you Nik if you need a paper go to the one in the high street, not the one just off it. Its a bargain, couldn't believe.....etc

That's 2 minutes of my life I will never get back.

Work from home I tell you. I get to watch the cricket today. and avoid all quite a few people I despise.

 

[Bluejuice]

TLO, it's Gatwick innit. Be my guest to come by and stomp on him.

And Hannibal, if I coud, believe me, I would.

I don't crave the attention of other people and could happily work entirely on my own. Other people just get in my way, there's a time and a place for them (the right ones anyway) but it isn't at work.

 

[Chesney Christ]

The Nine to Five. We were not put on this planet to spend the majority of our waking hours (commuting time included) in abject misery for 40 years until retirement. Even if you love your job it all becomes one tedious routine after a few years of the alarm clock going off, whether you're a porn star or a civil servant. My mates on the dole have a decent enough standard of living, are never short of dosh for a serious weekend in publand, could work but choose not to and seem very content with their lot. Where did I go wrong?

Great post.

There's something inherently wrong with the fact that we seem to spend the majority of our waking hours dedicated to working (or travelling to and from work), rather than pleasure. Why do people accept this?

Whenever I bring this up, people just call me lazy. Nonsense, we've come to accept this status quo and its slightly tragic.

Long live the dole "scroungers".

And before anyone says anything, I am in full time employment.

 

[Bluejuice]

I certainly miss my days of studenthood, bunking lectures and claiming benefits, never paying for anything but beer.

Ah marvellous days.

The way I see it though, I work and work for a year and then f*** off somewhere far away and warm to live peacefully for myself rather than for anybody else.

I am not going to spend my life as part of the machine

 

[Tooting Gull]

@?i]Originally posted by Bluejuice [/i]
The Daily-Mail reading bigot sitting opposite me today is driving me f***ing nuts. He's just turned the radio off (from bland and inoffensive Radio 2) in order that we have to listen to his incessant Tory ramblings instead. I don't want to hear his voice but he seems to love it.

He went on for about an hour earlier about how this country needs Thatcher back in power. I nearly choked on my tea. Now he's belittling Guardian readers and raving about Elvis.

f*** OFF OFFICE TWAT

The worst part is he was retired but the company got him out of retirement to do his old job because they couldn't be bothered to train anyone new up.

Very tempted to go home sick, or just throw a brick in his stupid face [/QUOTE]

I can't stand people who put the radio on at work, it's really annoying and makes it impossible to concentrate. And if his views are offensive, make him look a twat with your own arguments - if you've got any.

And let's face it, Guardian readers who slavishly regurgitate PC dogma on every issue are also very irritating.