Tommy Elphick needs help with women

[severnside gull]

just to lighten the mood.........



Tommy posted on Twitter today

"I need help. I'm lacking confidence with women right now"

Any advice for young Tommy from NSC's (vastly experienced) great and good?

 

[Emily's Mum]

Tommy doesn't know this, but that young man needs ME!

If a young man called Matthew reads this, please don't give me any abuse, your mother is perfectly capable of getting abuse from everyone else, and yes, your mother does have a life of her own!

 

[The Large One]

Don't have a horse gimp mask in your bedside cabinet.

Or have gay porn stories by the side of your bog.

 

[Triggaaar]

Tommy doesn't know this, but that young man needs ME!

If a young man called Matthew reads this, please don't give me any abuse, your mother is perfectly capable of getting abuse from everyone else, and yes, your mother does have a life of her own!

Run Tommy, run!

 

[SK1NT]

Maybe point him to NSC and he can also be bombarded with... russian girls, ebony girls, cougars and men in uniform.. enouigh there to tickle his fancy...

 

[Mellotron]

Don't have a horse gimp mask in your bedside cabinet.

Or have gay porn stories by the side of your bog.

Ahh, the richly complex and multi-layered humour of Charles Oatway.

 

[Mellotron]

Maybe he could ask a few of the other youngsters at the Albion for their tips and experiences?

Matter of time. Didn't think it'd be you though.

 

[SK1NT]

cant they have a players and gullys girls disco?

 

[mejonaNO12 aka riskit]

*Queue slanderous comments*

I'm leaving this WELL alone

 

[S'hampton Seagull]

Nooney probably hacked his account.

 

[severnside gull]

In all seriousness, he's young, fit and healthy and rich, but without any real fame or intrusion (or professional commitments for the last year for that matter). Are we meant to seriously think he's got a problem securing the ladies?

Indeed although I guess wearing a plaster cast for much of the last year then having to spend hours in the gym might be part of the story

 

[Billy the Fish]

The best advice I can give is to only put in one finger on a first date, don't try for any more or they'll think you're being too pushy.

 

[Knightsworld]

The best advice I can give is to only put in one finger on a first date, don't try for any more or they'll think you're being too pushy.

Shit, that's where I went wrong then.